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Rejection kills

Rejection kills

109K Reads 3.1K Votes 22 Part Story
Hannah Jones By _Rose_Gold Completed

"No you're not!" he shouts "You'll live... You have to! You're my mate" 

"Yes I am and the sooner you get that through your head the easier it will be when I do go! You rejected me Mase and I know you didn't know what would happen but you still did. I pleaded you not to but you still did it"  it started out as a shout but it turned in to a whisper.  

What happens when you are rejected by your own mate? 
No one knows. Until now. 
My name is Emma Williams and this is the story of how I died

kieran_grace kieran_grace Sep 01, 2016
You really need to try to make this more interesting because you have literally nothing to draw the reader in. You just list your characters and give a ton of info, and people won't remember this. There is also nothing interesting about it when there is no action or detail but just an info dump.
InTheSc3n3Crowd InTheSc3n3Crowd Jul 30, 2016
The amount of mispronunciations of the word Worcestershire will be immense.
- - Aug 12, 2016
This is really good! i like the tone you have sounded like a typical student in this xD maybe try for more description (more showing than telling)
KeyaiiLeKawa KeyaiiLeKawa Aug 22, 2016
She has school for six hours?! I have to go to school for eight hours! Fml