Shadrach

1987: I had nothing good to say about the time I lived in. I was bored. I wanted something new to happen, but, surely I would have picked boredom over my neighbor's death, or the monster loose in the cold Northwestern night.

This isn't some "careful what you wish for" cautionary tale. I just want to tell you what happens when you're a complete IDIOT, as I was when I decided to take on a mystery I wasn't cut out for, or when I put all my trust in some baseball player too coked up to remember my name.

I should have trusted my friends who told me I was nothing but an ambitionless stoner, I'm sure my high school experience would have been so much better if I just stuck to that. But wouldn't you know, little Marcia here thought it would be "fun" to play detective.

WINNER OF THE WATTY'S 2016 WRITER'S DEBUT! I also showed it to a friend once and she said it was "not too bad".