Loving A Chinese Boy (S1 COMPLETED )
"Can you remember everything now? Every thing? All of it?" she asked me again and I nodded. Besides the sound of the recorder beeping, and my steady breathing there is no one else you can hear unless one of us will talk.
I am remembering everything, and all that I could see is the flower vase on her desk. "I remember these things... he betrayed me. I can't forgive him. I can't, Stella. How his lips moved, his eyes tearing up, my heart pounding so hard inside my chest. How it feels like to have it pounding like that inside me, it was painful. Like as if my heart's breaking and my rib-cage slowly cracking up. I hate that I loved him. I hate how he made me laugh so hard but even worse when he made me cry. I hate how he push me out and then pull me in afterwards. How he treated me whenever he knew I was his possession and whenever I broke our chains and how he tried to tie it again. That's our cycle. I just...." I breathe out heavily, my chest contracted as I do that. And a woeful sob came out of my mouth. I didn't even realize I am crying. "I want to mend my shattered heart. What should I do?"
"What's keeping you from doing it?" She asked.
My lips trembled. "him."
"What do I say whenever this happen?" she sighed and shook her head, "if you really want it, drop it. Drop the unnecessary baggage. And in this situation, it's him. I know it's hard. But you can't mend a broken heart when it keeps on breaking."