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The Kivilirozan Mind Link: The Assassin's Clan

The Kivilirozan Mind Link: The Assassin's Clan

900 Reads 32 Votes 5 Part Story
Tristian (AKA super blanket man -,-) By Sekirei107 Updated Jun 07, 2011

Siliviak.
A young man,  taken from home. Taken from Earth.
Taken to the planet; Anim.
Kalimn, the one who brought him taught him the ways of fighting, the ways of stealth, the ways of the Assassin.
He has become cold, hard, and cruel.
He remembers little of compassion.
In fact, he remembers little of anything.
He acts on what he is told, and on instinct. For one year he has learned to do this.
But what happens when the kingdom of Hanuis sends assassins to kill him? 


Rikoziam.
Cocky. Arrogant..Stubborn. Each of these words could be used to describe this person.
His father, killed, one year before. Later that day, he starts receiving visions.
The role of his father was hereditary, a bond forged long ago by the king and Rikoziams ancestor.
He heads the army, and leads the imperial guard. but that isnt all. He is Advisor to the king.
The visions make him irritable. He loses his temper constantly.
But their worth it. He knows of an assassins clan, who has been the only one able to stand up to the indefinitely.
lead by the Elusive NM...
(picture: one on left with blue hair: Rikoziam. One on Right: Siliviak

ashIey ashIey Oct 18, 2011
This was good.  A lot of the sentences started with "I." I don't think it really flowed. Don't get discouraged.   This is a quick fix, so don't sweat it!  The idea is really good, and has lots of potential, so keep at it!
icecubegirl icecubegirl Oct 03, 2011
I hope the mysterious girl takes him to Disney world! :D now on the serious side, your story might not be prefect, but it's still good! *vote*
Lamizaisme Lamizaisme Mar 23, 2011
 Pretty good for a first chapter, not a lot of detail but that's alright since the chapter flows nicely. A few minor grammatical errors so just make sure to check it over, other than that its not a bad first chapter. 
purplegirl14 purplegirl14 Mar 07, 2011
Very cool! Just read over it to catch a few mistakes, but I really want to know what's gonna happen!!!
Sekirei107 Sekirei107 Feb 03, 2011
@Catluver2121 hmm just so you get an idea, i am going to post my chapters in parts.
Sekirei107 Sekirei107 Feb 03, 2011
@Catluver2121I am working on it now and thnx. I came up with it when creating a character for a game. his hair was silver- sil and the rest was random