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Alice's Baby girl

Alice's Baby girl

43.9K Reads 1K Votes 12 Part Story
punkbarbie By punkbarbie Updated Dec 12, 2016

What if Bella and Edward had twin's but Gave the other child away due to Bella only wanting one. she still loved the other child but could only care for one. Read and find out what happens to this child.

And I found another piece that didn't make sense, I don't want to point out just things I find. It's a really good I just kind of want to make sure it's at it's best. When Alice said "Bella don't care" it should be "Bella doesn't care"
When you said "Paul go with her and Jacob and fix" it doesn't really sound right. I think it'd sound a bit better if you had said "Paul go with her and Jacob so you can fix the mess you made, Jared you can go help." But this is just my opinion but I thought I wanted to tell you anyhow.