Does He Love Me For Me Or Because Ima Whore And Pleasure Him Nicely (Love Story)

Does He Love Me For Me Or Because Ima Whore And Pleasure Him Nicely (Love Story)

42.6K Reads 201 Votes 6 Part Story
Ki Ki <3 By makemebreakmebabe17 Updated Sep 23, 2010

An Old Fashion Story  Between To Old Lovers Will Love Finds It Way Or Will Hatred?

xXxJoJoBeanxXx xXxJoJoBeanxXx Apr 19, 2011
spell check!
                              Its good, but remember make new paragraphs before and after somebody speaks and make it clear when maryanna is thinking something because it was sort of like you were going from 3rd person to 1st person which confused me.
                              I think the story line is great. :)
                               
xXxJoJoBeanxXx xXxJoJoBeanxXx Apr 19, 2011
I like it! 
                              
                              To improve you could pace out the paragraphs to make it easier on the eyes and always do a new paragraph when u start to talk about something else.
                              
                              But im lovin the story so far :D x
                              keep it up!
just_Gonna_be_Me just_Gonna_be_Me Jul 06, 2010
poor maryann!!!
                              she is a lady tht is just lost and forgotten