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What's a Smosh?(A Smosh Games Fanfiction)

What's a Smosh?(A Smosh Games Fanfiction)

43.1K Reads 1.5K Votes 49 Part Story
... By The_Nameless_Writer_ Completed

"Ian," I breathe out. He smiles and hugs me. He spins me around. 
"How's my favorite cousin been?" I ask. 
"I'm your only cousin," he says with a laugh. I laugh. 
"Com'on let's go to my house," he says. Ian drives to his house. We sing songs that come on the radio all the way there. We pull up to a small white house. He grabs my large suitcase. I sling my backpack over my shoulder.
"You didn't have to grab that I could've-" 
"I wanted to," he says. We walk inside and I see another guy sitting on the couch. 
"Hey, Ian," He says. He notices me. "Who's this?"

Already loving the fact it starts in Michigan we don't get enough recognition
Not to sound rude but as an aspiring English teacher I'd like to give you some friendly criticism. You say I too much. To make a good story with a nice flow you need to vary the first word more.