barried in lies

2 Part Story 112 Reads 5 Votes
amber247 By amber247 Updated 4 years ago
a group of girls... one outsider....several lies.....
Okay I like the idea for the story its definitley going to be good! Because I know the story lol ;) I cant wait to her it from your point of veiw. Theres alot of grammer mistakes which is okay not everyone is awesome about that. There just simple things like captalization using the right word and some spelling. Another thing it would make it much easier to read if it was broken up into small paragraphs because its hard to read a huge clump :) Also try to add more into the different things it feels like your going really fast try to add more with each problem and lie. How you felt what was going on. The idea is awesome just some editing and it will be even better. Hope this was helpful ;D
Okay I like the idea for the story its definitley going to be good! Because I know the story lol ;) I cant wait to her it from your point of veiw. Theres alot of grammer mistakes which is okay not everyone is awesome about that. There just simple things like captalization using the right word and some spelling. Another thing it would make it much easier to read if it was broken up into small paragraphs because its hard to read a huge clump :) Also try to add more into the different things it feels like your going really fast try to add more with each problem and lie. How you felt what was going on. The idea is awesome just some editing and it will be even better. Hope this was helpful ;D
Okay I like the idea for the story its definitley going to be good! Because I know the story lol ;) I cant wait to her it from your point of veiw. Theres alot of grammer mistakes which is okay not everyone is awesome about that. There just simple things like captalization using the right word and some spelling. Another thing it would make it much easier to read if it was broken up into small paragraphs because its hard to read a huge clump :) Also try to add more into the different things it feels like your going really fast try to add more with each problem and lie. How you felt what was going on. The idea is awesome just some editing and it will be even better. Hope this was helpful ;D