Worn

Worn

173 Reads 8 Votes 6 Part Story
Lotte By lotte_buzz Updated Mar 19, 2013

When a girl arrives in East End, London the move gives her more drama than expected when she meets a certain boy band.

  • british
  • hazza
  • horan
  • liam
  • louis
  • malik
  • niall
  • onedirection
  • payne
  • styles
  • tomilinson
  • zayn
WritePerfectMemories WritePerfectMemories Feb 15, 2013
@lotte_buzz I like it a lot better now! A lot of writers write a flashback without much detail, which in most cases is not a bad thing, but when you need to describe emotions it's best to write more about them. So thumbs up and keep writing! 
                              Love, Jerina
lotte_buzz lotte_buzz Feb 15, 2013
I changed some of the flashback so it had more information :) @WritePerfectMemories
WritePerfectMemories WritePerfectMemories Feb 15, 2013
Hi there, the flashback could use a little more detail and emotion but I like the 'present' part. It's nice and it shows her discomfort. But the flashback part isn't really good, or even sad, which you would expect as is goes about her families death. 
                              Love, Jerina
- - Feb 15, 2013
Really good so far. She should definatly continue with this story. cant wait for the next update!