*My twin sister*Brothers conflict

*My twin sister*Brothers conflict

61.6K Reads 1.5K Votes 29 Part Story
Ksenija By kiki_kom Completed

Ema Hinata now Asahina,was living with her 13 brothers. One week before her father and Miwa-san's wedding, Ema receive letter thet will change their life. Read and find out what will happen. I'm not good at descriptions.

Pastelz2Pastelz Pastelz2Pastelz Aug 03, 2016
The story is progressing well, but your use of conjunctions and prepositional words is lacking therefore making the flow of the story choppy and confusing.....
Kawaiikuroneko96 Kawaiikuroneko96 Dec 12, 2016
Woah woah because she was smart and pretty she had to move? Wat kind of logic is that?
Pastelz2Pastelz Pastelz2Pastelz Aug 03, 2016
In addition, there are plot holes which make the story confusing and hard to follow.....
Kawaiikuroneko96 Kawaiikuroneko96 Dec 12, 2016
For her nickname spelling u should put 'Angie' it sounds cuter that way. But of course that's just my opinion u don't have to do it if you don't want to
igot17sugakookies igot17sugakookies Feb 29, 2016
How is she her adopted TWIN sister?! I don't get it at all..