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Pen Your Pride
From Chaos Comes Order

From Chaos Comes Order

73.7K Reads 8K Votes 41 Part Story
Jimi Rodriguez By highpost1388 Updated Jun 09

Surviving in a school of magic and murder is not easy! *2015 Watty Award Winner*

Jacob Titus is a forgotten boy from Eslor Island. With an absent father and a mother who battles Alzheimer's disease, Jacob has long learned to care for himself. When he is discovered by a magical talent hunter, Jacob makes the difficult choice to leave his home and enter the Valcrest School for the Promised.

As his school years go by, Jacob has to spend as much time trying to stay alive as he does finding a cure for his mother. As violence and blood lust at the school escalate, Jacob must learn to figure out who he can trust. 

All he wanted was to save his mother, and now he must save himself.

  • alzheimers
  • badboy
  • comingofage
  • fantasy
  • fantasy-romance
  • featured
  • fighting
  • love
  • lovetriangle
  • magic
  • magicschool
  • newadult
  • romance
  • youngadult
SallyMason1 SallyMason1 7 days ago
Intriguing start and overall improvement. There are still a couple of sentences to smooth out, but the overall concept reads much better.
SallyMason1 SallyMason1 7 days ago
Maybe something like "His smile was as fake as his apology, both simply designed to get ...." That way, you draw a clearer picture in the reader's mind.
Goprobro12treexD Goprobro12treexD 4 days ago
Well time to start reading, I loved when we read this in your class. I knew it was a good book. 2017 was a fun year
holy crap. I can already tell this is an improvement from the previous version - very strong opening /w questions presented to the reader!!
VioletSun5 VioletSun5 Mar 23, 2017
This just crushed me because we're going through it with my grandmother right now.
SallyMason1 SallyMason1 7 days ago
Let's see what you did with this (though I have to warn you, it will be a long while before I get through this).