Virtual Attraction (New)

Virtual Attraction (New)

17.9K Reads 887 Votes 24 Part Story
StarrySky By inastarrysky98 Updated 2 days ago

Seventeen-year-old Blaze Allen just wants to get through her last few years of high school trouble-free, after spending the past two years in a correctional program for Juvenile Delinquents. It's a long story. Now she's the new student at Manhattan Dalton Academy, an upstate school for rich kids. With a chronic stutter and zero social life, she's spent one too many Friday nights home alone watching I Love Lucy re-runs. But when she stumbles upon a popular writing website called Fable, she finds a whole community of introverts just like her. And more specifically, a strange guy, who just won't leave her alone...maybe she doesn't really want him to.

  • anxiety
  • featured
  • fiction
  • hilarious
  • humour
  • introvert
  • justinbieber
  • love
  • lovestory
  • one
  • passion
  • rich
  • romance
  • rudeboy
  • summer
  • teen
  • teenagers
  • teenfiction
  • teenlove
  • writers
cassiebatt cassiebatt 8 hours ago
 #bbc
                              
                              I enjoyed this chapter, I think it’s a great opening to the story. I noticed a couple of issues with the tenses but other than that it was good. Make sure you proofread your work or even read it aloud to see how it sounds. Overall very good first chapter!
Alicia20M Alicia20M 5 days ago
I'm not entirely sure if it was your intention, but I think you have one too many "is an F's" in there. xD
                              
                              Also, after that first dialogue, it should be a period:
                              
                              "An F is an F is an F." She smiled.
Alicia20M Alicia20M 5 days ago
I believe quotation marks should be at the beginning. :)
                              
                              Oh, look! My name is at the end of this list. c: xD
Alicia20M Alicia20M 5 days ago
You're missing a quotation mark on the end of this paragraph. ;)
Laronce Laronce Dec 01
There’s a lot going on in this chapter. It was over all good however there was a few things I wish were explained. There were a few jumpy areas where you moved topic to topic. I can’t wait to see what happens
*war flashbacks to when random ppl would make out in front of my locker*