Percy Jackson and the Department of Mysteries
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- Votes 5,286
- Parts 147
- Time 16h 7m
Ongoing, First published Oct 17, 2021
Percy Jackson faced his worst summer yet when traversing the Labyrinth, and he's ready for a school year of relaxation. With one of his friends roaming the hallways with him, he should've known he wouldn't be so lucky.
This friend is Harry Potter.
During their fifth year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, the Ministry sends in a tyrant to make sure the school is run as it should be. Percy isn't a fan of Dolores Umbridge's new way of running things.
Follow Percy as he deals with magic, monsters, and a tyrannous pink toad in his fifth year at Hogwarts.All Rights Reserved
#572percyjackson
- 0.5) Introduction
- 1) Buttocks: The Best Way to Start a Book
- 2) Imagine Writing a Chapter When You're Supposed to be Working
- 3) Kids, Do Not Toast (Microwave) Forks
- 4) I'm In Me Friend's Car, Broom Broom
- 5) Grim and Old Grimmauld Place
- 6) Capslock is a Godsend
- 7) I Bet Ears Aren't The Only Things That Are Extendable *Winky Face*
- 8) I Think There Are 16 'Percy's In This Chapter
- 9) Walburga, Walburga, On The Wall, Who's The Purest Of Them All?
- 10) I Screw With Ron, But Not In The Dirty Way
- 11) Good Soup
- 12) They Argue Almost As Much As The Author's Parents Before Their Divorce
- 13) Voldemort Ate My Chocolate Frog Cheesecake
- 14) I Get Chased by Traffic Cones
- 15) If I'm Afraid of Walburga, Can I Eat A Walburger to Make Walburga go Away?
- 16) Percy Jackson's Guide to De-Doxying the Weird Curtains
- 17) Seriously, Kreacher, You Make Sirius Serious (what an original joke)
- 18) I Don't Run On Spite, I Run On Sprite
- 19) BREAKING NEWS: This Chapter Contains Breaking News
- 20) Snape Comes, Insults Me, Then Leaves
- 21) Blue Pancakes - That's It, That's The Title
- 22) You Must Listen To The Disembodied Voice (not the one in your head)
- 23) Sure, The Statue Is Pretty, But Its Personality Is Trash
- 24) Infreno: The Story Of Dante's Journey Through The Ministry (AKA Hell)
- 25) Luigi Is Hot And I Can't Be Convinced Otherwise
- 26) Allen
- 27) Taradiddle - Okay, That Really Is A Weird Word
- 28) ^^^ God Gave Me That Picture And Now I Share His Word With You
- 29) Good News! Wait, No, Now There's Malfoy
- 30) He Got Off
- 31) Guys, Please Take S.P.E.W. Siriusly
- 32) Harry Potter: Tournament of Champions Is A Disaster
- 33) Ron Might Be Unloved
- 34) I Have A Sirius Talk With Harry (But It Has Nothing To Do With Sirius)
- 35) It Sounds Like Fred and George Are Doing Drugs
- 36) RIP Ron
- 37) The Author Remembers Nugget Exists
- 38) There's A Plot Twist At The End Of The Chapter
- 39) Cho Talks Porcupines
- 40) Laughing, and Laughing, and More Laughing, and Probably More Laughing
- 41) Hermione Is Kind Of Unkind
- 42) NOTICE: No Loitering Allowed On Or In Front Of These Premises
- 43) Harry's Horse Headache
- 44) Luna Scares Ron (Wuss)
- 45) What A Nice, Happy, Warming Song
- 46) I'll Need Speech Therapy After This
- 47) Humuhumunukunukuapua'a
- 48) I Do Lines - You All Know What That Means
- 49) I Kidnapped a Chair Once
- 50) This Coffee Tastes Like Dirt, It Must Have Been Ground This Morning
- 51) We Call This a Filler Chapter
- 52)
- 53) He's Creepy, But He's Nice, I Think
- 54) R-E-S-P-E-C-T Take Care, TCB (Read In Aretha Franklin Voice)
- 55) Hermione Gets Defensive About Defense
- 56) Fifty Shades of Pink
- 57) Ever Heard Of The Knife Game?
- 58) We Had A Bonding Moment! I Cradled You In My Arms!
- 59) I Should Just Vanish From Class
- 60) Stick Bug :(
- 61) Rad-ish Earrings
- 62) Keeper Tryouts - and Seeker Tryouts - Are Boring
- 63) The Ill Quill - Because It's Sickening
- 64)
- 65) The Clamorours Owl, That Nightly Hoots and Wonders. At Out Quaint Spirits
- 66) Sturgy Gets Caught
- 67) Dope Worms, Bro
- 68) Katie Probably Liked The Nose Bleed. Weird Little Masochist
- 69) <---Nice
- 69.5) ;)
- 70) This Girl Is In Fire (Sirius Is The Girl)
- 71) Sirius Takes On Harry's Daddy Issues
- 72) This Is A Really Long Article
- 73) 'T' Stands For Terrific Essay, Right?
- 74)
- 75) Umbridge's Confidence Vanishes... Yay
- 76) I Really Like The Name Grubbly-Plank
- 77) Happy Easter, My Little Reader Eggs
- 78) Harry Yells Again - That Seems To Be A Recurring Theme
- 79) Yeah, Yeah, Yeah
- 80) Highlighter Humpers
- 81) So Many Subjects, All In One Chapter
- 82) A Yorkshire Conversation
- 83) Several Sets Of A Couple Of Students Walk Into A Bar
- 84) Zacharias Can't Shut His Mouth
- 85) We Figure Some Stuff Out - Not A Lot Of Stuff Though
- 86) Almost Forgot A Title Again
- 87) Sorry, Umbridge
- 88) I Pray To... Someone?
- 89) Draco Gets Hit On
- 90) Your Mom
- 91) Speaking of Sacrifices
- 92) Umbridge Gropes
- 93) I Am Beneath
- 94) Connor Doesn't Wash His Robes
- 95) Unorthodox Uses of Jellybeans
- 96) The Jellybeans Have Arrived
- 97) I Got Mad Whistling Skills
- 98) Sword VS. Pants - Who Will Win?
- 99) Funny Chapter Title
- 100) Weasley Is My King - Really, I Adore Him
- 101) Draco Gets Hit On By Two Sports Guys - Lucky
- 102) Hagrid Got Hit On, Too
- 103) Hagrid's Journey Of Self Discovery - He Discovered Nothing
- 104) Hagrid Presented Presents
- 105) More Giant Talk
- 106) The Wicked Witch Arrives
- 107) Umbridge Plays Good Cop, Bad Cop, But Forgets About Good Cop
- 108) Hagrid's Lesson - Bad Idea, But I Like It
- 109) Crude Sign Langauge = Bird
- 110) Umbridge = Hera = Terrible
- 111) Umbridge Hates Math - The One Thing We Can Agree On
- 112) The Cho/Harry Kiss Was Wet
- 113) The AN Is Longer Than The Chapter
- 114) Dean Finally Has A Moment!
- 115) Dumbledore Looks At Everyone (Harry Excluded)
- 116) Some Sirius Stuff Went Down
- 117) I Finally Get to Sleep
- 118) 2000s Fashion Trends Haunt Me
- 119) Doctors Use Lighter Fluid
- 120) Yay Hermione (:
- 121) Big Snake Man
- 122) A Bad Teacher Approaches - He Comes With Autographs
- 123) Playboy: HEILF Edition
- 124) Netflix and Kill
- 125) Daddy-o
- 126) He Only Resurrected Him a Little Bit
- 127) Insert Sirius Pun Here
- 128) Bad News From The Newspaper
- 129) I Am Percy - Hope You've Figured That Out Five Books In
- 130) Harry Murders His Love Life, and Draco Nearly Murders A Person
- 131) I Can't Think Of A Chapter Title, Comment Your Ideas Please
- 132) Quidditch Is A Quidbitch Sometimes
- 133) Justin, Oh Justin, How I Yearn To See Your Egg Throwing Skills
- 134) Watch for Awesome Alliteration
- 135) Ari978
- 136) Humans Bad, Centaurs Good
- 137) Fudge Fell Down A Well - That Rhymed!
- 138) Dumbledore's A Drachma (;
- 139) A One-Handed Fight
- 140) Watered Down Milk
- 141) Harry Does A Bad Thing (Again)
- 142) I Get On My Knees For Umbridge
- 143) I'm Gonna Let Harry Make A Mistake
- 144) ALMOST FORGOT A TITLE AGAIN
- 145) This Chapter Was Written Out Of Spite
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