"I've always had this feeling that I wouldn't live to see past 30. Life has always been hard for me and I know that one day, it'll kill me." I put down my pen and slash my wrists, painting the paper a beautiful red. I look at the note and tuck it in a book for safe keeping. I look down at my thighs and see the words "die" and "you won't be missed" etched in to my skin, glowing in the lamp light. I reach for the Advil on my desktop and open the bottle, throwing my head back and gulping down as many as my throat would allow. I sigh and stumble to my bed, a wicked smile on my face and an excited feeling in my stomach. Awaiting death makes me feel alive.