World Eclipse [UNDER CONSTRUCTION]

World Eclipse [UNDER CONSTRUCTION]

2.7K Reads 71 Votes 9 Part Story
Mufasa :) By swimchick26333 Updated Sep 19, 2010

This story is about a girl named scarrlotte who gets dragged off to this school where the kids have a magical power when she gets there she realizes a lot of her old friends are there. She soon gets her powers and is having fun at the school when something horrible happens. Her and her 6 friends are now running for their lives trying to get away from a evil scientist/genius who trying to take over the world by creating a World Eclipse.

FrozenDreams FrozenDreams Jul 06, 2011
i like the idea your getting at in this book [chapter] 
                              but it reallly seams you just rushed it? usually, the first chapteer is the chapter that will make people want to continue reading or not, so maybe try editing it?
FrozenDreams FrozenDreams Jul 06, 2011
i loooveee your prol.!!! 
                              its really unique haha ;D 
                              [ btw, i told you id read your book.] ;D
missy_aurora missy_aurora Jun 29, 2011
The intro is engrossing.  Although I think you need to reword this first chapter  so that it sounds more professional.  It felt rushed and immature with things like anyhow starting with  Hi and somewhat run on sentences.    Story idea looks promising though.  
Safalia567 Safalia567 Jun 29, 2011
interesting shortness :0 if this weren't finished I'd beg you to go onto the next ch. but its already posted... :0 heheheheehehheheheheheheh <3
                              
                              *voted*
NahDeesession NahDeesession Jun 24, 2011
very shprt....a few mistakes .......otherwise Awesome ness. 
NahDeesession NahDeesession Jun 24, 2011
..........This is kinda reminding me of that show that i'm totally obsessed with. What was it called...OH YEA! Heroes. hahahahahahaha now i wanna read more.