Our Universe (Alien Story)

Our Universe (Alien Story)

22 Part Story 16.9K Reads 374 Votes
Jennifer By SuffocatingHugs Completed

Jas is a simple girl who would give her whole brain to study and get straight A's.
    When she wonders home from having a great time with her friends she finds a boy: Xavier. Since she lived on her own with no parents to say what to do, she takes Xavier under her wings and realizes he isn't what He seems.

shinee13 shinee13 Feb 18, 2013 08:32AM
In all honesty you need to edit this and also some parts did not make sense and I was not able to read it. Just some feedback.
Ella12648 Ella12648 Aug 26, 2012 05:50PM
Sorry, I'm sure it's actually a good read, but it needs some serious editing. I could barely read the first few sentences. :/
dcrazygalz dcrazygalz Jun 04, 2012 09:31PM
Hmm. You really need to edit this. It has promise, but the errors in your sentence structures take away from the book. It makes it hard to read.