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To Have Rosaline

To Have Rosaline

32.6K Reads 1.8K Votes 38 Part Story
It's Out There By BelieveNUnbelievable Updated Apr 08

She's different.

Born with a gift she could bring any man she wished to their knees. 

At a young age she was told to never sing in front of others inorder to prevent the worse from happening. 

Rosaline's life was perfect ....
That is until her father doesn't return home from work one day.

Her quest to find him has her coming face to face with one of the worlds most dangerous creatures hidden in the dark. 
Battling life and death, evil forces trying to rip her apart at every turn, her bewitching voice that is more trouble than it is beneficial and two men fighting for her love, it's all she can do to hold herself together and pray for a happy ending. 

Will she be able to survive through it all? Moreover will she find love at the end of a dark, dark tunnel?

* * * * * * * EXCERPT * * * * * * * 

She was frozen in fear, shaking from head to toe as she watched Rhyvos's skin ripple in a way that looked as if his bones were shifting into place. Hair began to grow out of his revealed skin and his face became deformed. She blinked and there stood exactly what you would see in every scary werewolf movie. It was just what Abellon called it. A beast. Nothing of the King's body was left. Only a monster. 

It stood on it's hind legs and slammed it's front feet into the ground when it was only feet from her before letting out a ferocious roar. 

Her sight went black and she felt herself fall. 

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *


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MollyIveson MollyIveson 2 days ago
sorry if i over step boundries with suggestions.. 'her job is being' could be replaced by 'she is a' or 'she works as a' which, imo are a bit smoother x
Wolfgirl5729 Wolfgirl5729 Jul 25, 2016
This book is very good so far, but I do see some grammatical mistakes! I suggest proof reading before you punish a chapter!
WriterKellie WriterKellie Apr 05, 2016
Again, I think this is a nice, interesting story that's different from usual~ This chapter is actually a lot better than your prologue!
                              It could use an edit though; in particular, there is some switching of verb tenses (past vs present) that could use some cleaning up.
monkeymehehe monkeymehehe Mar 08, 2016
This is so good. Its like a real novel. Smooth and silky sentences throughout.
spiritbooks78 spiritbooks78 Jul 05, 2016
5'7 is not petite, that's average.  Now 5'3, my height, is petite.
WriterKellie WriterKellie Apr 05, 2016
Interesting premise here! I think it's a bit tell-y and could use an edit, but overall, I really enjoyed the story concept in the prologue. :) Just needs some help on the technical end, but that's nothing too hard to fix!