Let It Flow

Let It Flow

142K Reads 6K Votes 31 Part Story
Elizaema By Elizaema Completed

Vampire King Jason Fear was standing by her door, weak and covered in blood.

-Y-Your Highness! gasped Stacey in horror

Panicking, Stacey lied him down on her bed.

-You are bleeding! Oh my! What should do???

The King grabbed her wrist from touching his wound.

-Stacey, do you love me? he asked

His eyes were sorrowful and hopeless. Stacey was in shock, the truth was inevitable.

-Yes, she whispered

For the first time of his life, a tear escaped from his eyes.

-I love you Stacey, since the moment I laid my eyes on you. But I thought you would never love a monster like me.
But you must know, that as long that you will love me, nothing can kill me.

Saying those words, Jason's wounds instantly closed, leaving only dried blood on his smooth and pale skin.

Her love had saved him.

..................................................
Copyright @Elizaema - PG-18

  • vampire
  • wattys2014
Men is plural . Man is singular. So when you use men, no need to add 's' behind it 
                              
                              
                              
                              
                              
                              Just helping, no hate please
Ladybugg20 Ladybugg20 Apr 04
I mean, seriously? I can't read this book. Not without quotations, anyway. I'll come back when you do that, Author. Or if you do it....
But can't vampires erase memory, hypnotize and some other stuff that vampires can do. And he's a king so since he's a royal, he can have this powers right? 
                              
                              But I understand if those powers doesn't exist in this book, just giving my opinion
This book needs quotation marks. And to be more descriptive. Cause tight now it's a little too rushed
Ladybugg20 Ladybugg20 Apr 04
Where are the quotation marks? They let people know that there is conversation going on. You should put some in, just saying.
ILuvToRead52 ILuvToRead52 Jul 23, 2016
It sounds rushed and I don't understand the beginning of the paragraph.  There are no details to explain what and why things are happening plus the grammar is very distracting.