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Risky Temptations

Risky Temptations

531 Reads 23 Votes 4 Part Story
Alice By hello679 Updated Oct 22, 2012

Jen has everything going for her; a great boyfriend, a great best friend, poularity, good grades, a bright future, but will a new guy at school change all of that?

Author's note: Please comment on what you think! or opinions on what u think shud happen next, and stuff like that. thanks!!!

hello679 hello679 Dec 02, 2012
@DesLovexx thanks for the advise. you see, i had a lot more description in it, then someone commented telling me to get more straight to the point so i dont really know what to do. lol
kAckRssI kAckRssI Dec 01, 2012
Great story! It's a great start. I just hope that as you go on with the story you'll make the chapters longer
DesLovexx DesLovexx Dec 01, 2012
The tenses are a bit mixed up, which well it happens. I get confused between them too! :) You have a great idea of the story, and I think maybe a bit more description would be good? Great start, honestly! Voted x
meccabartin meccabartin Dec 01, 2012
Awww. This is seriously cute, the interactions between both couples. & The fact that all four of them are friends with each other is also very adorable! Love it! :)
raindrops_ raindrops_ Dec 01, 2012
I like the interactions between your characters. Several grammatical errors found-- I hope you can edit them. :)
xLauraAnne xLauraAnne Dec 01, 2012
This is a really nice start to this story, and I really like that it's in first person. The descriptions are good. Overall it's pretty good. I may actually continue reading this. (: