Forever..

Forever..

1.3K Reads 22 Votes 4 Part Story
@JulieM819 By YouHadMeAtHello Completed

Nikki hates change. Every day, everything's always the same. It's just--well--usual. She has two best friends, Lindsay and Ally, an amazing boyfriend, Blake, the cutest little sister, Kylie, amazing parents. Everything in her life seems perfect. Except for when the one person closet to her, her grandmother, gets sick. Then, Nikki's world turns upside down. Everything changes. Her family has to move across the country to be with her grandmother. She has to leave her perfect life behind her. This is one change that Nikki has to learn to accept.

tianajade tianajade Feb 24, 2011
A good start. Make sure to separate your dialogue though. Have a new line each time a character talks. A few grammar and punctuation errors here and there, as well. Some more detail would be good to add too (: It was a good read though, so keep writing!
YouHadMeAtHello YouHadMeAtHello Feb 21, 2011
exactly,
                              well read my new story, it's called 'tonighs the night i'll fall for you again'
astoriapike astoriapike Feb 21, 2011
i kno. sometimes you forget the storyline and it becomes a big blob of words that are going nowhere
YouHadMeAtHello YouHadMeAtHello Feb 21, 2011
no, i completely agree. I'm not sure if i'm continuing with this one. It's really old, i found this on my computer from a few years ago, and my writing has definitly matured a lot over those years. You're not being harsh at all, I agree completely! It's just hard to go back and re-write stories. 
YouHadMeAtHello YouHadMeAtHello Feb 21, 2011
oh, it's not the same paragraph, just the line. Yeah, i did that as repition, it was intentional.
YouHadMeAtHello YouHadMeAtHello Feb 21, 2011
wait, where? i can't find what you're talking about? what page?