What a Strange Occurence

What a Strange Occurence

5K Reads 124 Votes 11 Part Story
Jill By StandUpJ Updated Jun 01, 2014

   Once upon a time in a faraway time there was a little girl, only 3 years old, but she was already beautiful; more beautiful than any living creature. She had fluffy blonde curls, rosy red cheeks, a happy demeanor, knowing eyes, an old soul, and her touch could light one on fire. her dreams showed her the beauty she would soon see, but also the pain and suffering to come. The pain that would leave her alone. You see it hadn't always been that way; she was born to Melody and Jacob Pond in 1663, Italy. The couple was visiting friends in Italy, but were so enchanted they left England for the Holy Land; to soon have a child under the Italian moon. But one night when the family was riding home in their carriage parade everything changed.

   "Mama are we home?" I whimpered with drooping eyelids.

   "I am sorry my sweet, but we are very far away." My mother chimed smoothing blonde curls.

   "Oh Papa!" I whimpered throwing myself onto the cushions of the carriage.

   "Just rest here chil...

Randomnyl Randomnyl Sep 08
Guiseppe makes me thinkof the salvatore brothers from vampire diaries
Csteptoe Csteptoe Mar 03, 2014
Great last line.  I like the name Zarah so unique. I also like how this little human has already it seems won the hearts of these vampires.
LSU_Burrito73 LSU_Burrito73 Feb 23, 2014
definitely not a twilight fan! that withstanding, this was really good! its very descriptive and damn was it sad! the dialogue was fantastic, natural and flowed well. you really draw the reader in with a great first chapter, good job!
Csteptoe Csteptoe Feb 20, 2014
StandUp you've done a brilliant job.  This chapter is so descriptive and devastatingly sad.  You really captured the reader and pulled on my hearts strings. 
                              Poor child.  
                              
                              I believed I was seeing the scene through. The childs eye.  Girl you did an amazing job.
EvaReigns EvaReigns Feb 19, 2014
Nice last line for this chapter.  Wonder if she'll last, indeed.