Caught In The Middle With My Boyfriend and His Friend?!

Caught In The Middle With My Boyfriend and His Friend?!

1.3K Reads 33 Votes 2 Part Story
xomusicluvr16xo By xomusicluvr16xo Updated Apr 09, 2011

A girl named Jayne goes to the ice-cream parlor with her boyfriend Aaron and his best friend Jason. When Aaron leaves, Jason tells Jayne that he is starting to have feelings for her, while Aaron was behind him. So the rest of Jayne's school year, Aaron and Jason are trying to steal her heart. Jayne thought she would always be on Aaron's side but then she started hangin with Jason a bit then she gets caught in the middle!

XxIcyxX XxIcyxX Aug 16, 2011
It's an interesting start, but I think you should add in more details... get the reader FEELING what the main character is feeling, get what I mean?  but other than that, I think it's a wonderful begining and I honesly didnt notice any errors :D
TEAtitanicfan TEAtitanicfan Jul 20, 2011
interesting start....it's sort of blunt, if you know what I mean.  But that's a good way to capture the audience :) Vottteeeeed, and heading to the next chapter :)
GymLife GymLife Mar 22, 2011
This is super good!!!!! LOVE IT! well, the idea... You haven't really written it yet... Anyway, when is you're plan for posting? All I've gotta say is POST MORE!! :D
TheLibMyster TheLibMyster Feb 25, 2011
cool, i hope she picks Aaron. Don't know his perosonalitly but i like the sound of him xx
Iismiile Iismiile Feb 13, 2011
hmm i like it :) cant wait till next chapter :) btw do you want me to make you a book cover
ChemicalKid13 ChemicalKid13 Feb 13, 2011
Really good, grammer errors, good idead for a story, it needs a lot more detail, but it's good :)