Captain Critiques: A Grumpy Pirate Review Bo...
When it comes to reviews, I'm probably as harsh as the hellhole most story ideas crawl out of.
I'm blunt, sarcasic, to the point and I know what I like in a story. As you can probably guess, you don't wanna take my advice if your like an overprotective mother about your story. Who am I kidding, EVERYONE is like that about their stories.
But, if you could find the courage to pry the story out of your cold, crabby hands so I can give my brutally honest opinion then be my guest.
Just don't try and start a fight once I provide it.
You DON'T wanna fight a pirate.
I reserve the right to decline stories as this will be taking up quite a bit of my time and if I say no, I mean NO. If your blurb is unreadable I will decline it. If it includes the genres mentioned in my 'Hell No' section then I will send it back where it came from.
Do NOT critique the Captain.