Burning Beauty

Burning Beauty

795 Reads 17 Votes 6 Part Story
Dreamsinourskies By Dreamsinourskies Updated Sep 03, 2012

`"If you play with Fire, Your gonna get burnt" Kenna Hill is 16. Brownish red hair, amber eyes and a calm collected adittude but set her off and there was no turning back . Kenna Hill has a secret though, A secret that only her father knows. She has the power of Fire . She knows she gifted but what happens when the girl who thought she knew just about everything her life had to give her finds out that there are more secrets hidden farther into the past then she imagines.

  • air
  • baby
  • caring
  • confusion
  • creatures
  • demigods
  • earth
  • evil
  • fam
  • fire
  • flame
  • fox
  • foxes
  • fright
  • goddesses
  • gods
  • good
  • greek
  • happiness
  • helios
  • independent
  • kenna
  • light
  • love
  • mysterious
  • mystery
  • mythology
  • romance
  • sadness
  • scared
  • secrets
  • suspicious
  • truth
  • water
dreamy_ dreamy_ Jul 23, 2012
You had some punctuation problems, and capitals where it's not needed. But it's a good start.
cloudsinourheads96 cloudsinourheads96 Jul 18, 2012
I really like this.:D Yeah you do have some mistakes they said but other then that great story i cant wait to read the rest of it and see were this story heads !
Dreamsinourskies Dreamsinourskies Jul 16, 2012
Im glad you liked it.@ArielleAndrews 
                              @MarineLynn thank you for your feed back@yourlilRIOT7 you too i really thankful for  it ill use your advice
Nerali Nerali Jul 16, 2012
loved this!!! omg, they LEFT THE BABY IN THE BARN surely the mother would have realised!? lol
MarineLynn MarineLynn Jul 16, 2012
You have a really good description and hook, but you do have errors. You seem to have errors regarding punctuating dialogue. Just google on how to do it and then you'll be fine. Besides that, there were some grammar issues.
yourlilRIOT7 yourlilRIOT7 Jul 16, 2012
definitly an interesting way to begin your story, it's really gripping! The baby being left inside! And then him deciding to care for the baby! It was a cool begining.
                              I DID catch quite a few grammar errors though, so maybe you should go back and edit. I'm sure you'll catch most of them!