Hellpriests Stories

Just an AU of mine I'd like you opinion on. What do you like? What dislike? Do you like my writing style? If not, what don't you like? Do you not understand something? If not, what. Do you want me to continue this? Etc, etc... Please note that english isn't my first language and that plot-holes, gramma errors and all that stuff can be present. If you could point them out to me that'd be great. This story is also inspired by the "ADDC" Series by Amazonion and "Garnets" by Omicron_The_IceQueen; both on Ao3. They're both incredible writers and you'll notcie quite some paralels in this story to Chapter 1 of Amazonion's book "A Desperate, Defenseless Creature" and my itteration of VEGA (and the Slayer to a slight extend) compared to Omicron's.