Hardcore critiques here... enter if you dare.

  • Scarlet_Dawn
    3 years ago

    I AM AVAILABLE FOR CRITIQUES, GUYS. I'll be doing at least 600 words for your critique. Now, here are some rules.

    1. Copy and fill in the form below. If you do not fill it out correctly, I will ignore your request.

    2. I will critique the FIRST TWO chapters of your story. If you'd like me to critique the whole book, we shall have to do a swap and you will have to critique a story of mine in return. (500 words minimum for yours.) Write the word RAINBOWS at the beginning of your request if you'd like me to do the whole book.

    3. I will not critique fanfiction. That's my number one thing. No fanfiction.

    4. I shall be assessing your grammar, plot line, sentence structure, character development, etc. I will be blunt and honest. Nothing I say is to degrade your writing, only to help you improve, okay? (:

    My story: http://www.wattpad.com/story/1046227-for-the-love-of-sam-and-eva

    ^ Only if I'm doing a critique for your whole book. You must critique 2 chapters or more.

  • Scarlet_Dawn
    3 years ago







    GO, GO, GO. c:

  • sivilsj
    3 years ago

    TITLE: He Sees Me

    AUTHOR/S: sivilsj

    GENRE/S: Horror.

    LINK: http://www.wattpad.com/story/1752101-he-sees-me

    SUMMARY: You’re being followed. I know you don’t believe me. I know you probably think I’m crazy—hell, even I doubt my own sanity sometimes—but it’s true. He’s always there, always watching you. You may not see him, may not even know he’s there, but he is. He’s outside your windows at night, he’s standing on the side of the road as you drive by, he’s at your bedside when you sleep. He’s in your head, playing with your mind. I know this all sounds stupid, but you have to believe me. He took my friend, Nathan, and there’s no telling how many others he’s taken. I could be next, or maybe one of my other friends. Or even you. I have no idea how he takes people, or why, or what he is, but I know he’s there, and I know that I have to stop him. My name is Matt Reaves. This is my story.

  • dreamsmadereal
    3 years ago

    Here's mine. BSOL- Book One of the Angel Series: By me, dreamsmadereal Genres: sci fi/teen fiction/mystery Link:http://www.wattpad.com/story/932892-bsol-the-first-book-in-the-angel-series In the year 2020, Essy has already faced divorce, death, and the many horrors of WWIII. But suddenly, everything starts to become perfect... Too Perfect. Through all the deception and lies, Essy knows that she has been taken someplace that is definitely not earth... @Scarlet_Dawn

  • AspiringHope
    3 years ago



    TITLE: Jemma

    AUTHOR/S: AspiringHope

    GENRE/S: Science fiction, romance, fantasy

    LINK: http://www.wattpad.com/story/1633388-jemma

    SUMMARY:In the year 2012, earth is attacked by an alien race that destroys the planet and puts an end to civilization. Three hundred years into the future, humans live in caves in the midst of the highest mountains. The story follows Jemma, a twenty year old who was born and lived all her life in the caves. But when one of the people closest to her is forced to leave the cave, Jemma experiences an episode that leads to her to discover an enormous power within her. This power sets her out on an adventure that will lead her to discover a shocking truths about the aliens, about earth and about herself

    PS: Thanks for doing this. Let me know which story of yours you want me to read. :D

  • juliapearlmeg
    3 years ago


    TITLE: How I Didn't Get The Romantic Movie Ending

    AUTHOR/S: juliapearlmeg

    GENRE/S: Romance, Short Story

    LINK: http://www.wattpad.com/4729786-how-i-didn%27t-get-the-romantic-movie-ending-once

    SUMMARY: This is your classic boy meets girl story. Vincent is sitting at a coffee shop, reading a book. All of a sudden, Harper walks in, dripping wet from the pouring rain. He offers his handkerchief to her, not knowing that it will be the start of their love story. Vince does all the romantic things, like in the movies. But, as said in the title, he doesn't get the ending he expects.

    TITLE: To This Day

    AUTHOR/S: juliapearlmeg

    GENRE/S: Romance, Short Story

    LINK: http://www.wattpad.com/5837195-to-this-day

    SUMMARY: This is a story about a guy who found love through hate. What happens when the governor's rebel son falls in love? A lot of things. But you can have the pleasure of finding out for yourself.

    TITLE: My Ex-Boyfriend From Kindergarten

    AUTHOR/S: juliapearlmeg

    GENRE/S: Romance, Short Story

    LINK: http://www.wattpad.com/story/1740914-my-ex-boyfriend-from-kindergarten

    SUMMARY: Cairo Ocampo was Dune Tomas' first love, first boyfriend, and first kiss. Unfortunately, Cai doesn't remember any of this because it all happened seven years ago in kindergarten. He and his family has since moved abroad. But now he is coming back. Dune still has everything he gave her, especially his break-up note.

    Feel free to choose which one/s to critique. Thank you! ((:

  • _Onyx15
    3 years ago

    Dear agony


    Teen fiction/romance/watty


    "You're a player, huh? So let's play a game. We'll hug, have fun, text, talk, kiss, do anything a couple does. And whoever falls inlove first, loses." Alone. Abused. Rejected. Troubled. And talented. After Dee was dumped by her boyfriend, Dee becomes unpopular and an outsider. To help her get through highschool she relieves her troubles though music. That's how she meets Dear Agony, a local rock band. After this, her life change forever including revenge, hate, love, and jealousy.

    Sorry I suck at discriptions give it a chance please!!!!

  • AflyingMonkey
    3 years ago


    TITLE: Slip

    AUTHOR/S: Kat

    GENRE/S: Short story/ teen fiction

    LINK: I am slipping into a black hole. Maybe it was the loneliness or maybe it was the mystery, but I wanted to talk to this guy. I really wanted to talk to this guy.

    SUMMARY: http://www.wattpad.com/6261019-slip

  • lostariadne
    3 years ago

    Here is my story, thanks! :)


    TITLE: When There Were Wolves

    AUTHOR/S: lostariadne

    GENRE/S: Teen Fiction/Werewolf

    LINK: http://www.wattpad.com/story/1615013-when-there-were-wolves

    SUMMARY: Nina is a nineteen-year-old Hunter-in-training. There are three things she knows for certain: 1. Werewolves were evil and must be exterminated for the good of humankind, 2. She and her boyfriend Adam love each other, and 3. She is going to become a Hunter. But everything changes when her first hunting expedition goes terribly wrong. The truth is no longer as simple as it seemed; she begins to question her own reality and what she thinks she knows. The time is coming for Nina to face the Werewolf once and for all...

  • CeeBella
    3 years ago


    TITLE: Cinderella's Revenge

    AUTHOR/S: CeeBella

    GENRE/S: Adventure/Romance

    Link: http://www.wattpad.com/story/1582412-cinderella%27s-revenge

    SUMMARY: ‘Life isn’t all that you expect. Sometimes it decides to swerve into a dark and sinister alley and it takes a while to escape into the big, bright world we call Earth. You sometimes need to make painful decisions in your life and sacrifice them in order to achieve what you want.’ – Excerpt from Vivian Banks/Rebecca Churchie’s Diary

    Vivian was always a mysterious but cunning girl. She was ruthless yet also kind but when it’s revenge we’re talking about, well, let’s just hope you don’t get on her bad side. If only they knew what they were getting themselves into earlier, they might still be alive long enough to go to her 19th birthday party… if they were that lucky. She had planned this for almost as long as she can remember but she never anticipated them to be shattered by someone who she had never expected. Someone who she shouldn’t have started to fall for.

  • TheGreatDance
    3 years ago

    TITLE: Rules Were Made to be Broken

    AUTHOR/S: TheGreatDance

    GENRES: Science Fiction/adventure/romance



    Photobucket http://www.wattpad.com/story/1048665-rules-were-made-to-be-broken-watty-awards-2012

    Thanks! :) @Scarlet_Dawn RAINBOWS

  • a_aaron
    3 years ago

    TITLE: coinholder

    AUTHOR/S: anna aaron

    GENRE/S: fantasy adventure

    LINK: http://www.wattpad.com/story/1695224-coinholder-part-1

    SUMMARY: It's no secret Cassie's mum is struggling to bring up her and her little sister Bo single handedly, so when Cassie receives an unexpected fully paid scholarship she can't bring herself to turn it down - no matter how much she wants to. But Cassie get's more than she bargained for when she arrives at her new school. She finds herself in the centre of a world she never even knew existed, with powers she doesn't fully understand, and it seems that all hope of peace among the elemental Coinholders has been pinned upon her shoulders. There's only one thing Cassie knows for certain - she can't do it alone. But who does she trust in a world where emotion can be manipulated, feelings can be controlled and thoughts can be tampered with?

  • paradoxxical
    3 years ago


    RAINBOWS (Can u critique my last 2 chapters if that's possible? if not then u can critique the first 2 as u like :)) )

    TITLE: Forbidden Blood

    AUTHOR/S: PinkyGurl

    GENRE/S: Vampire/Romance



  • _DeathNoteNinja
    3 years ago

    TITLE: The Chance

    AUTHOR/S: Clarissa Tennant

    GENRE/S: Science Fiction (Dystopian)

    LINK: http://www.wattpad.com/story/1271236-the-chance

    SUMMARY: In a society that accepts nothing less than utter perfection lives Consolae Jaksonis, a girl who is anything but. Shunned by her peers who were all bred for specific talents, she's gotten used to walking alone...For no one's ever dared to follow.

    ...Until now.

  • Demoiselle_dragonfly
    3 years ago

    The Gate Guardian: The Secret of Falmora part one




    Arianwen is a Guardian and with that title comes a heavy burden intertwined with a mysterious and terrifying thousand year old legend. When Arian's brother goes missing and reports of strange black shadowy figures fill the realm, Arian starts to have serious doubts. What if the legend is true?

    Thanks in advance!! I hope you enjoy :D

  • blackmagick
    3 years ago

    Creatures Of The Night BlackMagick Paranormal/Thriller/Action/Adventure/Romance (No vampires!)

    http://www.wattpad.com/6374040-creatures-of-the-night Love is hard. Love is harder when you can't look your lover in the eye. Love is harder when one scream from your lover will kill you. Really kill you. Love is harder when your parents can't see her. It is hard to love a Banshee. But he did

  • blackmagick
    3 years ago

    Creatures Of The Night BlackMagick Paranormal/Thriller/Action/Adventure/Romance (No vampires!)

    http://www.wattpad.com/6374040-creatures-of-the-night Love is hard. Love is harder when you can't look your lover in the eye. Love is harder when one scream from your lover will kill you. Really kill you. Love is harder when your parents can't see her. It is hard to love a Banshee. But he did @Scarlet_Dawn

  • angeldrb
    3 years ago

    TITLE: Please Be Mine Forev-- Until February

    AUTHOR/S: angeldrb

    GENRE/S: romance, teen fiction, humor

    LINK: http://www.wattpad.com/6088414-please-be-mine-forev-until-february-01-what-do-you

    SUMMARY: Sophia Reyes has a plan, and it involves her ex-boyfriend. With Sophia's wicked and utterly confused mind, that is never a good sign. What does she need with her ex? And why? Will her ex go with her crazy plan?

  • _bellyflops
    3 years ago


    AUTHOR/S: Of The Sea

    GENRE/S: Adventure/Teen Fiction

    LINK: http://www.wattpad.com/story/1485131-of-the-sea

    SUMMARY: Cora's father was an excellent story- teller. He would talk about whole other universes, where mystical creatures lived. He was so excellent she had suggested on more than one occasion he should become a professional story-teller. Her father would always smile knowingly and say that these stories were only for her ears, because she's his special daughter. But she never really realized how serious he was about that. And then the dreaded happened, Cora grew up. She grew up, leaving her life of fantasy adventures behind. She called it her second life but little did she know her third and most important life would begin at her father's funeral.

    If you're only going to do two chapters, is it okay that you pick 2 after chapter 4? Thanks!

  • _HarmonyHouse
    3 years ago

    first, I just want to let you know that I fully understand my story is not good. I have no idea how to make it better, hence why I came to you. I ask that you only critique what I have written so you don't waste time on my co-writer who has not asked for a critique. It will be clear who has written what.

    TITLE The Poison of Lust

    AUTHORS: HarmonyHouse and BlackCatLucky

    GENRE: Fantasy/ Other

    LINK: http://www.wattpad.com/story/1722539-the-poison-of-lust

    SUMMARY : (I know this summary involves fangs, but this is not a vampire story) Five people share a mysterious dream revolving around an ominous red door guarded by a set of glowing red eyes and fangs dripping with blood. When they are faced with the real thing, they find all of their fantasies come to life... but at a deadly price....


  • _ChasingDreams18
    3 years ago

    Hi @Scarlet_Dawn! Since you're doing two chapters, do you mind reading chapters two and three? Chapter one is more of a foreshadow of what's to come, so you can skip this chapter. Thanks!

    TITLE: The Eyes of Apathy

    AUTHOR/S: ChasingDreams18

    GENRE/S: Teen Fiction, Romance

    LINK: http://www.wattpad.com/story/1749328-the-eyes-of-apathy

    SUMMARY: How would you feel if your entire life was suddenly pulled out from underneath you? Everything you knew, everything you wanted, gone in a flash. For Abigail Hanson, this is now her reality. With her father being accused of murder, her best friend shutting her out for good, and a new dangerous life waiting around the corner, Abigail is thrown head first into a world she never wanted to be in.

  • ohmyfudge
    3 years ago

    TITLE: Hellfire

    AUTHOR/S: LilMissSteampunk (me)

    GENRE/S: Thriller/Horror

    LINK: http://www.wattpad.com/story/1756643-hellfire

    SUMMARY: Charlie is fearful of who he truly is. For when night falls he become something of anyone's nightmare. And despite being somewhere in the back of his mind, watching everything he does - he can not control who or what controls him. All he knows is if he doesn't find a way to release this demon inside him, sooner or later he will become this evil completely.

  • intoxicatedheartx
    3 years ago


    Intoxicatedheartx (Ash)



    Jens Bronte was popularly known as Jinx, due to her horrible and never ending bad luck. Daring and playful, Jinx one day decides to pay the haunted, old and abandoned Mortem Street a night-time visit. When her best friend, Scarlett, brings along their attractive and handsome friend, Jinx is more determined to remain unafraid and bold.

    The trio set out on a spooky adventure into an old mansion, with an Ouija board, and end up awakening something unpleasant from its deep slumber - and it is not happy. Finding themselves in a dangerous and deadly situation, the three of them attempt to make their way out ... hopefully, alive.

    I'd appreciate it if you do a critique for mine, thank you. -Ash

  • _BiancaAlexisTaylor
    3 years ago


    TITLE: Straight in a Crooked World

    AUTHOR/S: Bianca (me)

    GENRE/S: Teen fiction/ Wattys/Romance


    The world as we see it...or maybe it should be the gays as we see them! In a world where the population is prominently gay heterosexuality can cause conflicts. It did for these two! A nobody at Solae High - Jason suddenly finds himself the center of unwanted attention when the people of his world find out his preference! Unbeknownst, pulled to an old friend- Ashlia and her to him...these two find themselves against the world of homosexuals. As if life was easy with Mason bullying Jason to no ends he now had to suffer the scrutiny of his friends and classmates for choosing someone inappropriate? But was it really? Pushed against a wall with no way to escape these two teenagers stand to fight back for the person they love and who love them back just the same...but will they succeed?

  • _SomeGirl
    3 years ago


    TITLE: Beasts of Prey

    AUTHOR/S: SomeGirl

    GENRE/S: Action/Mystery

    LINK: http://www.wattpad.com/story/1697003-beasts-of-prey

    SUMMARY: The greatest assassin in the world never fails, never gets caught, never falters. Today, the greatest assassin in the world has been discovered.


    I only have two chapters up at the moment, so I'd love to hear some of your thoughts on it so far. Thank you for your time.