Mai's pov
One year later
Echoing footsteps trudged along outside of my cell, reaching closer to me every step. Voices could be heard, but I couldn't piece together what they were talking about.
I sat up, readying myself for whoever this visitor could be. My middle length cobalt blue hair swept over my shoulders and rested on my back, tickling my bare shoulder blades that were exposed because of the black tank I was wearing.
The dark lit hallway didn't reveal the persons face to me, and all that could be heard was the key being inserted into the slot before the cell door creaked open, emitting a high pitched eery sound that pierced my ears.
The unknown person crouched down, his face now being leveled with mine, revealing himself to be my former sensei.
It's been a long time since anyone has visited me. To be honest, I wasn't expecting any of my old friends to want to visit me; a traitor and terrorist who betrayed the village and them.
Sakura visited me only three times, but, Naruto on the other hand came to see me multiple times that I became annoyed with his persistence. Not that I didn't appreciate it, though. It was good to see a familiar face after being in a small room all by myself with absolutely nothing to do but be with your own thoughts.
Speaking of, being locked up has forced me to focus on why Sasuke chose to defend the leaf village and come back to it.
After continuously thinking about his words, I have finally come to fully understand and realize what he meant.
It's made me love Konoha just like I did before I joined Taka. And I didn't notice how much I've missed this village until I came back.
Even if I'm in a cell, I still feel like this village could be my home once again. And this time, I will have Sasuke here with me.
I'm constantly worrying and thinking about him, and how he is doing being locked up. I wonder if he is regretting coming back, but, knowing him like I do, he is atoning for the sins he committed.
This had to happen, serving our time in jail I mean. Sasuke was right, he and I were too lost in darkness and became driven only by rage and revenge.
We lost our humanity countless times. Remembering what happened during my time in Taka, there's numerous things that I'm extremely guilty and regretful of.
I can't take any of those horrible things back, but I can go through my punishment and try to forgive myself for them. And I will be sorry for the rest of my life.
"So, I guess I'm the sixth Hokage now," Kakashi informed, snapping me from my thoughts only to become shocked, but happy for him.
"Wow, congratulations Kakashi."
He arched a brow and stood up. "Now that I've been named Hokage, it's up to me who stays in jail and gets released."
Kakashi motioned for a guard to join us in my jail cell, and attached to the man's hip was a thick ring with multiple keys dangling from it.
Was he.. going to let me out?
"Now, I feel like you've served your time. And I believe that you are no longer a enemy of the village hidden in the leaves. That being said, guards, release her."
I became satisfied. I served my allotted time, to be locked up for my sins. But, now, I'm being set free and Sasuke and I will live together here, In Konoha.
We get to be at peace with each other, this is something that I've wanted since I was twelve years old. And it's finally here.
I stood up and let the guards unlock my hand cuffs, the immediate feeling of tension being lifted off from my aching wrists.
"Is Sasuke being released as well?" I asked Kakashi as I rubbed my wrists.
"In a couple of days, yes."
I smiled with relief. I'm so happy and glad everything is over. All of the hatred, vengeance, and revenge is gone now.
It also dawned on me that I would have to face my friends that I've betrayed.
I don't think I'm ready, or that I'll ever be ready to confront them after everything I've done and put them through.
However, it's just something that needs to happen.
They might hate me for the rest of my life, and I will accept and understand that completely. But, I have to apologize and let them know how much I regret it.
Kakashi patted my back. "For the record, I'm glad you're back. And I'm proud of you for finding your old self again."
"Thank you, Kakashi Sensei."
Yes, he's indeed right. The me that was brainwashed from rage and anger for all that I've been through is now merely nothing.
I feel myself again, the me that always had hope and never let darkness consume me. The me that would never give up on my comrades.
And it's all thanks to the people here in Konoha who never gave up on me. I can never repay them, never in a million years. But, I can let them know how much they are appreciated.
"Let's go, I'm sure you're sick of this same old small jail cell."
~
Being tremendously nervous and scared was an understatement of how I felt at this moment. I'm practically forcing myself to walk through this village with every ounce of will power I have, which isn't quite a lot.
But, knowing that I have to apologize to my friends is what's keeping me going. Even though I am expecting screams and cruel words, they deserve to hear what I have to say.
The first person I'm meeting up with is my life long best friend, Ino. And she has no idea that I am even out of jail yet.
My heart is pounding harshly against my rib cage, basically begging to rip out from my body. Because the moment I stepped into Ichiraku ramen, my eyes laid upon a women with long blonde hair that was pulled up into a high ponytail. She had on a purple strapless top and a matching skirt.
I instantly recognized her as my best friend. For a sheer second, I second guessed this whole thing- and my body wanted to run out of the shop and hide from everybody.
But, I couldn't move, and since I was standing at the entrance starring at her like an idiot, she noticed and spun around to look at me.
Ino didn't seem to realize it was me at first glance, but I watched her slowly put together who I was as her blue eyes widened and her mouth parted slightly.
I swallowed thickly, my brain short circuiting the moment my eyes interlocked with hers. Suddenly, I had forgotten the sole purpose of me being here, and I continued on starring at her with no ability to open my mouth to form words.
Her eyebrows knitted together and her jaw clenched, eyes screwing shut as tears streamed down her face.
Seeing her in such state snapped me back to reality, and I finally was able to muster some courage to initiate a conversation with her.
I shakily approached her, taking a seat as I watched her cry unwillingly. It was obvious from her eyes being squeezed shut that she didn't want to cry due to my showing up, but I don't judge her for it.
"Ino, I know how you must feel about seeing me after... I left," I began, voice muttered and shaky. Ino kept her eyes shut. "I want you to know, that I am fully aware of the damage I have done to you and the others. To this village, as well. I've owned up to it, and I served my allotted time in jail for the sins I committed."
Ino opened her eyes, and they were filled with a mixture between anger and sadness. The tears rolling down her flushed cheeks and the upsetting look she was giving me, was enough for my own tears to brim inside my golden orbs.
I hate that I've hurt her this much. I hate that I know she's confused on wether to forgive me or not. And I won't ever blame her for choosing to hate me. Hell, I'd hate me too.
"I'm sorry, Ino. God, I'm so fucking sorry. I'm not going to make any excuses for what I did, because no matter what I still did them. I'm sorry that I left you, I'm sorry that I've hurt you. I want to let you know that I'm not here to make you pity me, I'm here because you deserve an apology."
At this point, I can't control the waterfall of tears that are cascading down my face. I study her intensely, trying to read her thoughts.
But, I can't. I have not the slightest clue what she is going to say to me. All I know is that she's deeply hurting from me.
Ino looked me in the eye, her piercing blue eyes sparkling from the shining sun.
"You did hurt me. More than you'll ever know, Mai. You were my best friend, and I loved you. And.. you.. left..." She stuttered through sobs, but nonetheless she continued. "But, I can't hate you. And, I don't hate you. Not at all."
My eyes widened from pure shock, a feeling of relief and confusion washing over me. How in the world does she not hate me? Not even a little bit?
"Wha- You.. don't?"
Ino wiped her orbs and warmly smiled. "No, I don't hate you. You have endured so much pain throughout your life.. and I'm not saying that makes what you did right, because it doesn't. However, I can understand how you became overwhelmingly confused because of that trauma living in your mind like a bad disease."
The more she spoke, the more bewildered I became. She was right, everything she had spoken was the truest thing I've ever heard. More importantly, Ino understood me. She always has.
"I.. was lost. I'm sure you've heard everything, and when I saw Maiko's head it was like something inside of me flipped like a switch. That's the moment each piece of me consumed within the darkness. But, you guys... this village.. never gave up on me even when I gave up on myself."
Ino's soft hands held mine, her thumbs gently stroking my pale skin.
"I forgive you. Thank you, for apologizing to me. Let's push this all to the past, and focus on the upcoming future."
I smiled widely, "Okay, Ino."
I don't deserve her forgiveness, but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't happy she did. Now her and I can grow and move on from the mess I made, and I will be sure to make up for my mistakes in any way I can.
"Love you, idiot."
"I love you too, Ino."
~
Having that conversation with Ino made my nerves for owning up to my sins disappear. No matter how the rest of them react, I'm doing the right thing.
I approached the shadow nin, who was lying down on the freshly cut grass with his legs on top of the other, his hands crossed behind his head to act like a pillow.
His focus was to the sky, where multiple differently shaped clouds were passing by.
I couldn't help but to smile as memories of he and I doing this exact thing flashed through my mind. It made me feel warm, remembering how close Shikamaru and I used to be.
I know that he knows I'm here, but his attention never leaves the direction of the dark blue sky. So, I took it upon myself to plop down next to him, flicking my orbs to join in on the cloud watching.
"Oh, you're out of jail already?" Shikamaru snarled.
Yeah, I deserve this.
"Yes. I got out earlier today." I informed cooly.
"Any particular reason you're invading my peaceful cloud watching?" He groused.
I shifted my body so that I was now lying on my side, my arm propping up my head as I rested into my palm.
"I'm sorry for leaving. I'm sorry for if I caused you any pain. I know my actions were wrong- none of them able to be justified. I know that. So, I'm saying that I've taken accountability and I'm deeply sorry from the bottom of my heart." I truthfully expressed, watching as he didn't bat an eye, his gaze staying glued on the sky.
Then, a low groan emerged from him and he sat up lazily. He scratched the back of his neck as a smirk tugged on his lips.
"Holding a grudge is a drag. But, don't expect me to be all buddy-buddy with you straight away."
I smiled at him, feeling satisfied with his reply.
"You mind if I silently lie here for a while?"
He rolled his brown eyes. "If you'd like."
~
Naruto, Sakura, Kakashi Sensei and I walked excitedly to Konoha's jail, eager to see Sasuke as it was the day he was being released.
A bundle of nerves and butterflies all joined together within the pit of my stomach, making a feeling of nausea overcome me.
But, I was also extremely happy to see Sasuke again, because this time he and I are finally home together. After all, it's always been the right person but the wrong time.
This, this is our time now.
"You three stay here, I'll go release him." Kakashi Sensei ordered.
I couldn't keep away the wide smile that formed, and the slight pink that painted my cheekbones.
"Mai, did you hear that Lord sixth and Lady Tsunade wanted to see you urgently?" Sakura asked.
Shit! Totally forgot!
I fake laughed and itched the back of my head as she furrowed her eyebrows, sending me a glare of disappointment.
"I will go right after this! I guess Sasuke getting released has been the only thing on my mind for the last couple days. Plus, Kakashi Sensei is here so he can't be mad." I confessed, cheeks heating up yet again.
Naruto chuckled at my state of embarrassment.
"Oh, don't act like you weren't excited too, Naruto!" Sakura yelled, making Naruto spin around to hide sheepishly.
God, how I missed this team.
We all then fell into a pit of laughter, becoming caught up with how we were all anxious about seeing Sasuke, that we didn't realize that he and Kakashi Sensei were standing silently in front of us.
I was the first to notice, because I felt his familiar chakra signature and it immediately caused me to choke on my laugh- completely silencing my voice.
Sakura and Naruto then widened their eyes, wasting no time in going over to the Uchiha.
Seeing his face sent a whirlwind of memories and emotions to momentarily paralyze me, mentally and physically.
It wasn't until he approached me himself, tucking a stray piece of my hair behind my ear to shake me back into reality.
The contact of his skin on mine sent a shudder down my spine. The desperation inside of me clawed it's way out as I suddenly embraced Sasuke into a hug.
He seemed taken aback at first, but then I felt him relax into my arms as his own snaked around my waist tightly.
He rested his face into my left shoulder, and mine was already nuzzled comfortably into his warm chest that was radiating onto me.
Touching him again, feeling him again, smelling him again- it was electrifying and exhilarating. Sasuke is my personal home, and I feel totally at ease being in his arms.
Sasuke broke the hug, only to softly place his lips on mine- the action both surprising and satisfying. I kissed back gently, our lips moving together in perfect sync.
This kiss isn't like the others. It's passionate, it's tender, and it's affectionate. And it feels amazing.
"Mai, lord sixth wants to see you now!" A voice called out from somewhere behind us, interrupting mine and Sasuke's moment, which irritated me.
But, I can't deny a request from the Hokage.
Our lips parted at the same time, and I sent him an apologetic smile. "Come by my house later tonight, okay?"
"Alright."
~
"Hello, Lord Sixth and Lady Tsunade." I professionally spoke, anxious and interested on why both of them wanted to speak with me.
Kakashi stepped forward with a stack of paperwork in his hands. "Yes. Before you left the village, it seems you were a very capable ANBU member."
"She sure was! Mai was one of the best, may I add." Tsunade praised.
I smiled warmly at her, appreciating the words of encouragement coming from her especially after being a enemy of the leaf for quite some time.
But, where were they going with this?
"Thank you, Lady Tsunade."
Kakashi arched a brow, "To get to the point, Lady Tsunade and I have been discussing on wether to hand back your ANBU position."
I hadn't really thought about it, but being apart of the ANBU was something I excelled in and it made me push myself hard. If I'm honest, joining again would actually make me happy.
The blonde stood up with a wide grin. "We aren't just giving you your spot back, but we've decided to promote you to captain! That is, if you'll accept!"
What? They really believe in my strength and talents that much to promote me straight to captain? I can't describe how content and fortunate I feel right now.
Without any hard decision making or hesitation, I replied, "Yes! I'll accept! Thank you both, so much!"
"Told you she would." Lady Tsunade smirked, making Kakashi roll his singular showing eye.
"Thank you, for not giving up on me."
She warmly smiled in response, before Kakashi dismissed me.
~
Loud pounding at my door jolted me awake from a nap, and I became excited knowing exactly who it was.
I swung the door open and grinned at the Uchiha, who's expression seemed too stoic for my liking. Did something happen? We're people not accepting him back?
Sasuke walked in my house, closing the door with his foot. He then took a seat on the edge of my bed, a sharp sigh emerging from his throat.
I became worried. "Hey, is everything okay?"
He glanced at me before replying. "I've got to tell you something."
For an unknown reason, those words made my heart fall into my stomach as I thickly swallowed. "I'm listening."
"I know we served time in jail for the crimes we committed. However, there's so much more I need to come to terms with before I can settle in this village."
I bit my lip, not quite understanding what he was trying to tell me. "What are you implying?"
He stood up and approached me, just inches away from my nerve- filled body. His hands made their way to my cheeks, gripping them tightly.
"I can't stay here. Not yet- at least. I need to journey the world with the way I view it now, and atone for my sins." He confessed, onyx orbs boring into mine.
Upon hearing that, I become filled with many different emotions. Anger, was the most prominent one.
I backed away from him, knitting my eyebrows together. "You and I just got out of jail, and now you want to leave me yet again?"
His face softened. "This is a journey I need to take for myself. I need to see the world the way I view it currently. And after that, I promise I'll be back for good."
Burning tears stung my eyes as they threaten to release, but I was strong enough to hold them back. I wanted to be mad at him for leaving me, but I can't be. Sasuke has always been in the dark, and now he's freshly in the light. And now he wants to travel the world as his new self.
But, maybe, just maybe asking him not to go might change his mind. Deep down I already know it won't, but it's worth a try.
I released him, tilting my head back so I could look him in the eye.
"I get it, I do." I muttered softly. "But, please... please just Stay."
Sasuke glanced at me with a guilt ridden expression, and that's when I concluded that nothing would persuade him into staying here with me.
His fingertips gently stroked my flushed face. "Why don't you... come with me?"
Shock struck me in the heart.
And I almost instantly said yes. Almost. And as much as I desperately want to be with him after all these agonizing years..
I feel like I'm meant to be in Konoha working as an ANBU blackops captain.
Yet again, as painful as it will be, Sasuke and I are being destined to part ways.
At least... at least this time it won't be forever.
"I'm sorry," I screwed my eyes shut to avoid watching his face fall at my rejection. "But I was just promoted to ANBU captain. And, I accepted."
I felt his fingers halt their movements, but in place of his hand his soft lips kissed my temple gently, making my entire body ignite like a fire.
"It's alright, Mai. After this, it will be you and I. I promise you."
My eyes shot open. "We just have to wait a bit longer, that's all. And when you get back, we can finally be together." I tried to remain positive, and as much as we had high hopes for us in the future- parting ways still broke my heart into pieces.
This doesn't feel right, but leaving my new captain Duty doesn't feel right either. Damn, this is going to be hard.
Sasuke leaned down and kissed me, and I kissed back as my hands traveled into his raven locks.
I parted my lips off from his. "I can't say goodbye, because this isn't goodbye."
He nodded. "I won't say goodbye to you, Mai. Because I promised you that when I return, we can be together."
Sasuke walked past me slowly, and I couldn't move my body. Hearing his footsteps inch away from me, and hearing the door shut- was the last thing to effect me before tears streamed down my face.
But his promise lingered in my mind. He will come back, and we will get to be together.
This isn't goodbye.
~
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