Before she knew it, Kanako was out of Michi's sights. The girl had ran away so quickly and unexpectedly that Michi hadn't had even the chance to stop her. As Michi trudged back to the cabin, she found her footsteps getting slower and slower until finally she stopped just short of the stairs leading up onto the porch. She just stood there, silently, not thinking anything. Finally, after several long seconds, Michi made her way up the steps and went inside.
Walking in, Michi found Chiyo and Jasmine sitting on the couch, while Mayu and Itsuki were playing some sort of game. Haruna was nowhere to be found, not that Michi really cared. "She's the last person I want to see right now," Michi thought. Before she could get away though, Chiyo got her attention. "Hey, where's Kana-chan? I thought you two went out together." Michi paused, then answered. "She said she wanted to stay outside a little longer. Something about the sunset." It was a complete lie, of course, but only Michi knew that. She was sure that telling the others that Kanako ran off into the woods would set off a chain reaction of panic. "Besides, it's not like she's helpless," Michi thought. "And I don't think the forest around us is too big. Kana-chan will be fine." Convinced by her own logic, Michi decided to head upstairs and stay in her room for a while.
*****
After a couple of hours had passed, it had become completely dark outside. Looking at the clock on her phone, Michi saw it was now a little past 10 p.m. Somewhat surprised that Mayu hadn't come up to their room yet, Michi decided to go back down and see what was going on. "She's usually early to bed," Michi remembered. "Are they still playing games?"
Reaching the bottom of the stairs, Michi found Haruna and Chiyo playing cards on the floor as Jasmine laid next to them, kind of watching as she nodded in and out of sleep. However, Mayu and Itsuki appeared to be absent. Just as Michi was about to ask where they went, the two girls walked in, looking worried.
"U-Um, guys? We couldn't find Kana-chan," Itsuki said nervously. "She wasn't out there?" Chiyo asked. "Well, we went around the cabin and up to the creek, but she wasn't where we looked," Mayu explained. "It's gotten pretty dark outside too. I'm getting kinda worried," Itsuki said. Chiyo turned to Michi. "You said she was just like, looking at the sunset didn't you?" The question was asked with a hint of suspicion. Michi looked away. "You heard me before didn't you? Maybe you should learn to listen to people." She said that, but her words weren't very persuasive. Standing up and taking a forward stance, Chiyo stared at Michi. "Mi-chan," she started sternly. "Where's Kana-chan?"
Michi was silent, but Chiyo kept her gaze fixed on the blonde-haired girl. Within seconds, everyone else in the room was staring too. Bent by the pressure just enough, Michi broke. "Kana-chan ran off into the woods," she muttered. It was quiet and spoken with a touch of bitterness, but it was enough for everyone to hear.
"Into the woods?!" Itsuki exclaimed. "Why?!" Michi reluctantly continued, knowing there was no way out now. "We had a big fight. Next thing I knew, she was running." "And you didn't go after her?" The question was spoken in a heavy tone, laced with anger. All eyes shifted to the source of it, finding Haruna standing up and glaring hard at Michi. The other girl glared back, but soon looked away. Michi wasn't able to hold such a look for long at the moment. After all, for as much as she didn't want to admit it, there was a part of her that knew it was entirely her fault that Kanako was missing.
"Tch," was all Haruna could say before she breezed past everyone and went upstairs. However, it was only seconds later that she came back down, sliding on her black jacket as she moved toward the door. "Haru-chi, where're you going?!" Chiyo yelled. "To find Kanako!" Haruna shouted back as she went out the door. Everyone was powerless to stop her.
"She's right!" Itsuki suddenly said. "We should all be out there looking for her!" "No way," Jasmine said, shooting down the idea. "Huh?! Whaddya mean no way?! Aren't you worried about Kana-chan?" Itsuki asked, somewhat irritated by Jasmine's reaction. "It's not that I don't care," Jasmine said. "But like, even if we use our flashlights, there's no way to guarantee none of us will get lost." "T-That's true, but..." Itsuki said, feeling defeated. "It'll be okay Itsuki-chan," Chiyo said gently and with a smile. "After all, Kana-chan's special to Haru-chi. If anyone's gonna find her, it'll be Haru-chi."
That reasoning seemed to be enough to tide Itsuki over for the time being. Taking a seat on the floor, Mayu joined her and did her best to comfort her friend. Now that the odds of anyone else going out were low, Chiyo turned her attention back to Michi, who was still standing near the staircase. "Mi-chan," Chiyo called, but she was simply met with a huff. Then Michi walked over to the kitchen table and sat down.
"I guess I'll have to talk to her later," Chiyo thought. She wanted to know what exactly happened between Michi and Kanako. She knew that if she asked Kanako, the girl would probably tell her, but Chiyo wanted to hear it from Michi. Through the whole trip, it had seemed like something was bugging her, and now that a fight had occurred, it seemed like it was time to try to get to the bottom of whatever was eating at Michi. "But in the meantime..." Chiyo thought. Her mind went to Haruna. "I hope you find her, Haru-chi."
*****
As soon as Haruna got outside, she headed down the steps of the porch and began to make her way toward the woods. She had no idea which direction Kanako had gone in, but looking around, it seemed like straight ahead made the most sense. The cabin was surrounded by a circular border of trees, but that didn't mean it was easy travel in every direction. Behind the cabin, the foliage was a little thicker, plus going that way meant that someone might've seen Kanako as she ran past a window. Since no one did, Haruna ruled it out. It was weak evidence and complete guesswork, but there wasn't much else to go on.
After exiting the cabin, on the left was more woods, but the path was cut off by the creek. It was shallow enough to cross it by foot, but that seemed unlikely, so Haruna took that option off the list too. That left going right or straight ahead. "50-50 shot," Haruna muttered to herself. In the end, she went straight.
Haruna began walking toward the wooden boundary, but with each step, her pace quickened. Faster and faster she began to move, and by the time she had reached the first tree, Haruna had broken into a full run. But, just as she did, she stopped. "Wait, how am I not going to get lost?" she wondered. Haruna had her flashlight on her phone, which she went to turn on, but with no Wifi, it wasn't like she could just pull up a map of the area. Looking around, Haruna saw some long-ish sticks nearby, which gave her an idea. "I'll stick these in the ground as I go," she thought. It wasn't a great plan, but with not much else to work with, she went with it.
Now having an actual plan of action, Haruna began to move quickly again. She couldn't quite run because if she did, she'd just have to constantly stop to put sticks in the dirt, but Haruna was still moving fast enough that someone could maybe jog next to her. Covering ground in large chunks, Haruna kept moving forward. The further and further into the woods she got, the more her panic began to set in.
"What if she got hurt?" Haruna wondered. "What if she got attacked by a bear?" The more she thought about bad possibilities, the more worried Haruna became. The sticks dropped out of her hand. Abandoning her efforts, Haruna ran. She ran through bushes and trees branches, plowing her way through. "I have to find her," she thought. "I have to find her!"
*****
In a small patch of grass that wasn't touched by bushes, trees or any other plant life, Kanako sat on her knees. If a person had happened upon her in that moment, they would've thought they were witnessing something holy. A girl sitting on her knees, spotlighted by the moon, holding her hands together and keeping her head bowed. It was a scene that would almost look mystical. But it was far from that.
The truth was, Kanako was on her knees because her legs felt too weak to stand. Part of what had led to that was that Kanako hadn't eaten much at dinner. Proceeding to then argue with Michi and run at full speed left her feeling a little lacking in energy. But that wasn't the only factor. The other thing that had led to Kanako falling was fear. At first, she had simply wondered where she was. She had looked around, trying to remember which direction she had come from. Unfortunately, when unfamiliar with a forest, all the trees look the same.
Kanako had thought about just picking a direction she felt was right and going with it, but considering how high the chances were of her getting even more lost, she decided that'd be a bad idea. So, ultimately, Kanako stayed put. She had no clue if anyone would come look for her, but considering she was with such a small group, it was only a matter of time until someone came for her. But, as time passed, Kanako began to feel more and more worried. Sunset turned to night, and night created a rather spooky atmosphere. Being all alone in the woods in near pitch-black conditions had begun to put Kanako very on edge.
At first, she had only been wondering when one of the girls would come find her, but that question turned into wondering if anyone was even looking. Thinking talking with Michi would only take a little bit of time, Kanako had left her phone inside the cabin. "If I had known this would happened, I would've brought it with me," Kanako had sighed to herself earlier. With no way to call for help, all she could do was wait.
But waiting was taking its toll and with night fully in charge of both the ground and sky, Kanako was becoming more scared by the minute. The nocturnal creatures seemed to be particularly active. Or perhaps that was just Kanako's imagination. A rustle here and there caused her to whip her eyes back and forth all around her, trying to determine if she was in any danger, but she never saw anything. A couple hoots from owls caused Kanako to jump, and the snapping of a branch was enough to make her squeal out in fear.
It was all of these little moments that added up and culminated into the scene of Kanako kneeling. It wasn't for religious purposes, nor was she doing some sort of meditation. Simply put, Kanako had fallen to her knees from hunger and fear, she had clasped her hands together in some attempt to calm herself down, and her head was down because staring at the ground seemed preferable to potentially seeing beady eyes sticking out through the bushes. The girl was quivering, feeling so scared that something might happen to her or that she'd never be found.
On top of it all were Kanako's own personal worries. "First Akio-kun, and now Mi-chan..." she muttered to herself. It was beginning to feel like, in one way or another, everyone was leaving Kanako behind. Akio and Michi kept pushing Kanako away, and Haruna and Chiyo seemed to keep changing for the better. In a way, it felt fitting to Kanako that she was sitting all by herself in the middle of the woods. Seeing everyone around her change in the ways they were, it made Kanako feel alone. Mixing those feelings with her current state of being scared, tears began to fall from the girl's eyes.
She wanted them stop, but no matter what she did or told herself, none of it made any difference. "I'm... all alone..." she sobbed. It was all too much. Her feelings for Akio, her fighting with Michi, her rollercoaster relationship with Haruna. Each one of these stirred so much emotion within Kanako. Then there was the deal she had with the boy she loved, her own personal insecurities that kept bubbling up to the surface and now her current predicament: lost in a forest in who-knows-where Hokkaido.
All Kanako could do was cry. She had no energy in her legs to stand and she was afraid to make herself any bigger than she was, out of fear of being seen as a target for wild animals. And as the tears continued to drip one by one, even closing her eyes wasn't enough to make it stop. But then, in a sudden moment of clarity, Kanako thought of something. It was a simple question, and one she was sure she had considered before, but thinking about it now, Kanako wasn't sure if she had ever thought deeply about it.
Why was Michi so against Haruna?
On the surface, it just seemed like the two girls didn't get along. However, digging below the surface appeared to only reveal mystery. "I just want them to get along," Kanako thought. "But I don't understand why they can't..." For Haruna's side, Kanako understood that Haruna could be a difficult person to get along with. Even if she did like you, she'd still insult you and yell at you. Looking past all of that though revealed a person that Kanako genuinely thought of as kind, gentle and strong-willed.
For Michi's side, Kanako just felt lost. In the time she had known Michi, never once had the girl shown such animosity toward another individual. It was true that Michi and Haruna were similar in the fact that they both could be a little mean-spirited, but it was in the way that they went about that that made them different. While Haruna tended to just be a jerk, Michi normally meant it in a helpful way (to some degree). Now, however, that was no longer the case. The only thing Kanako had witnessed was Michi being bound and determined to undermine, degrade and cut down not only Haruna, but Chiyo and Jasmine as well.
Unfortunately, for as much thought as that deserved, Kanako found that she had little motivation to go much further than that. "It's not like it really matters," she thought. "After all, I'm sure Michi hates me now... And who knows what Akio-kun thinks..." And thus, Kanako came full circle, arriving back at the pit of despair she had briefly climbed out of. She hadn't noticed, but her tears had temporarily stopped. But now that Kanako was back at her starting point, they began pouring out once more. It almost felt silly, crying again after having such a clear moment, but Kanako didn't know what else she could do. So she continued to sit on her knees, her cheeks getting wetter and wetter, glistening in the moonlight.
*****
"...God, Chiyo, quit pacin' already would ya? You're driving me crazy," Jasmine complained as she watched Chiyo go back and forth over the same spot near the door. "I can't help it!" Chiyo cried back. "It's bad enough Kana-chan's out there, but now Haru-chi too. What if neither of them come back?" "Weren't you the one who said it'd be alright?" Jasmine said, a little annoyed. Chiyo took in a deep breath and then let it out. "Yeah, I guess you're right... still..." Chiyo let her words trail off as she looked out the window. "I think I'm gonna stand outside and wait for them."
Once out on the porch, Chiyo stared into the dark. A breeze blew by, causing her to shiver. "It's cold tonight," she said quietly. "Here," Jasmine's voice suddenly said. She had come out to join Chiyo, holding out a jacket. Seeing her look of surprise, Jasmine shrugged. "It's not like you're the only one worried about them y'know." Chiyo smiled. "Thanks Jas-chin." Taking the jacket handed to her, Chiyo slipped it on and then continued to watch the woods.
For a few minutes, it was silent. Both girls stood still and waited. But then, one of them asked a question. "Hey, do you really think this plan of yours and Miyashita-san's is gonna work?" Chiyo turned to look at Jasmine, then thought for a moment before smiling gently and turning back to the area in front of her. "I don't know," she answered plainly. "But, we both know how Haru-chi feels." "What about Kana-chan?" Jasmine asked. "Kana-chan is... a little bit harder," Chiyo said. Jasmine laughed. "Guess it's not so easy playing matchmaker with two girls." "Yeah," Chiyo laughed shyly. "But I think it'll all work out in the end."
Just as they finished talking, Mayu and Itsuki joined them. Following behind was Michi. She still looked upset, but there was concern in her expression as well. "Any sign of 'em yet?" Itsuki asked anxiously. "Nope," Jasmine answered shortly. "I hope they're alright," Mayu said softly. Michi remained silent. Chiyo glanced back to her, but seeing her face was enough to tell Chiyo that she didn't need to push the issue. "She says all these bitters things, but when it comes down to it, she does care," Chiyo thought. "If only she didn't suck at showing people that..."
With all of the remaining girls gathered, they waited together, hoping for a safe return for Kanako and Haruna.
*****
Internally Haruna's body kept screaming at her. Aside from not being the best runner, she was also putting herself through sharp branches and thick foliage. The whole time Haruna ran, the numbers of cuts and other marks on her face and hands kept going up. She had made the decision to wear her jacket simply because of the temperature, but now Haruna was thankful that she had it on regardless. The jacket was helping to protect her arms and upper body. Earlier in the evening, she had also put on a pair of jeans, so overall her body was mostly covered. However, with her head and hands still exposed, Haruna had accumulated a handful of small injuries.
Although, even with those injuries, Haruna didn't slow down. In fact, she had only one thing on her mind. "Where is she?" Haruna asked herself for the thousandth time. "Where is Kanako?" Her questions were asked in a tone of panic, even inside her head. Her worry was so strong that Haruna didn't even notice the pain she was accumulating.
While she searched, Haruna kept moving faster and faster, becoming more and more frantic. She looked high and low (even though looking up was pointless; there was no way Kanako could climb up the trees). "Come on Kanako, where are you?" Haruna muttered, her eyes darting back and forth, looking for any sign of the girl she was in love with.
Finally, after rummaging through bushes and trees, Haruna reached a small clearing. The diameter couldn't have been more than 10 feet, but inside it, there was nothing but a bumpy and patchy circle of grass. Combined with the moon, it was like a spotlight had been cast. And, in the center of it, a small girl, with her hair up in a ponytail and wearing a light blue, white polka-dotted sundress. For a second, all Haruna could do was stare. "Whoa..." she thought to herself as she took in the scene before her. It was truly picturesque.
However, the beauty of the scene was instantly shattered the moment Haruna heard Kanako. She was crying, and unbeknownst to Haruna, she had been crying for quite some time. Dashing over to her, Haruna called out to the girl. "Kanako!" Hearing the sound of her name, Kanako looked up and saw Haruna running toward her. "H...Haru...na?" she said lightly, seeming to be in a tear-fueled daze. "Yeah, it's me," Haruna said as she came to a stop in front of Kanako. "I finally found you. I've been looking all over this stupid forest." Then she held out her hand. "C-Come on, let's head back."
Kanako began to reach up to grab Haruna's hand, but just before they connected, Kanako pulled away, instead dropping her hand back to the ground. "I... can't..." she said in the highest and tiniest of voices. "Huh? What do you mean you can't?" Haruna asked, confused. "This... is how it's supposed to be, isn't it?" Kanako went on. "Me... all alone..." "...What?" Haruna said, somewhat wide-eyed at the response she was getting.
Having so much time by herself while feeling so pained and lost, Kanako had begun to go down a sad train of thought. Thanks to Akio and Michi's actions, plus adding in her own observations, Kanako had come to the conclusion that the reason she felt so abandoned is because that was simply how it was supposed to be. If Akio wasn't going to respond to her feelings in the way she had hoped, then maybe it would've been better to let those feelings go. However, having held them for so long, that felt like an impossible task.
If Michi was going to continue pushing her further and further into a corner through Michi's own emotions and actions, then that's where she'd stay. Perhaps, Kanako had thought, Michi was right. She'd just stay how she was. As for cutting people out of her life, there seemed to be no need to do so. After all, they were all leaving in their own ways anyways.
Even Haruna and Chiyo, Mayu and Itsuki, and maybe even Jasmine all seemed to be headed in directions that led away from Kanako. Deep down, she knew that this could all very well be an over- exaggeration, a product of her own over-thinking, but... In the moment, it all felt true. Getting lost in the woods, combined with the emotional rollercoaster Kanako had found herself on over the course of the last several months, had proved to produce this result.
"First..." Kanako continued, still speaking in a voice that was shaking and one Haruna could barely hear. "Akio-kun pushed away my feelings... I know my situation is unique, but the way he was so adamant about it... Then there's Mi-chan... We can't even seem to get along anymore... Every time we talk, she gets mad at me..." Kanako paused for a moment, then looked up at Haruna, her face covered in dry and fresh tears alike. "Even you Haruna. You've changed. You look happier than you used to. I-It's good, but... That just leaves me, alone-"
In that moment, something inside Haruna snapped. She couldn't stand to watch or listen to Kanako anymore. Her suffering, her pain, it was all too much for Haruna to take. She wanted to make it stop, to just make it all go away, but that was obviously impossible. So, with there being nothing else she could do, Haruna moved...
...and wrapped her arms tightly around Kanako.
"I'M HERE!" she shouted, then more softly. "I'm right here, Kanako. So please... don't say things like that!" Haruna's voice was shaking as she tried to hold back tears of her own. "I'm not leaving you! I'm not going anywhere!" Suddenly, Haruna pulled away, but only far enough so the two girls could see each other's faces. Kneeling across from Kanako, Haruna kept her hands on Kanako's shoulders as she continued. "And what was that about me being happier? Why do you even think that is?! It's because you're with me, stupid!" Unable to hold back any longer, the tears began to flow for Haruna.
"I... No, we... need each other..." Haruna said in a soft and shaking tone. "So don't you dare say you're alone, because I'm right here. And you better not even think of leaving me either."
Kanako was speechless. She tried to come up with something, anything to say, but it was useless. Instead, Kanako decided to let her heart speak for her. It had been moved by Haruna's words, and to demonstrate its gratitude, it sent more tears pouring out when there seemingly shouldn't have been any left. Kanako's face scrunched up as they came, and Haruna embraced her again.
The whole time Kanako had been by herself in the woods, she had sobbed silently, but now, held by Haruna, she wailed loudly into the night. Haruna too continued to cry, overwhelmed by her own emotions and by Kanako's. With no more words left to say, the two of them simply sat there in the grass.
When Haruna and Kanako both wore themselves out, they let go of one another. Haruna was the first to stand. "Are you ready to head back now?" she asked. Kanako nodded, then as she rose, she laughed a little. "I bet we both look terrible." "Yeah, well, it's not like it really matters. We're camping after all. That's not normally something you look glamorous doing," Haruna commented. "I guess you're right. Ah! But your face! You have a few cuts!" Kanako exclaimed. "Oh, yeah. Some of those branches were really sharp," Haruna said casually. "When we get back, you better get those cleaned! What if you get infected with something?" Kanako said, worried. Haruna laughed. "You're such a worrywart! I promise I'll clean my cuts properly, okay?" Kanako sighed, but then nodded. "We should probably go back now. Do you know which direction you came from?" Haruna looked around before seeing a sizeable dent in the foliage to her right. "It looks like I did more damage to the woods than it did to me," Haruna said meekly as she pointed. "At least it won't be hard to find our way back."
Turning back to Kanako, Haruna held out her hand. "T-Take it," she said nervously and with a slight blush. "Y'know, so you don't get lost again." "...Okay," Kanako said, placing her hand in Haruna's. Together, they began to finally make their way back to the cabin.
As they did, Haruna asked a question. "Why'd you run out here anyways? Fukuhara-san said something about a fight?" "W-Well," Kanako began to answer. "Mi-chan was being really rude to you. I tried to defend you and demanded that she apologize, but she just kept going, even telling me she tried to blackmail you." "Oh yeah, that did happen," Haruna muttered. Kanako went on. "I was already so overwhelmed by what she had been saying that that just made me want to run away..."
Haruna was remaining calm on the outside, but on the inside, she could begin to feel her anger swell. "What is wrong with that girl?" she thought bitterly. "She calls herself Kanako's best friend, but she goes and pulls crap like picking fights all the time. Does she really think she's helping?" The more Haruna thought about it, the madder she got. "I could care less if she hates me, but she just keeps taking it out on Kanako."
The rest of the way back was handled with relative ease considering Haruna's tear through the woods. Looking at her own destruction, Haruna felt kind of embarrassed. "Maybe I went overboard," she thought. Of course, thinking about it, Haruna figured all the plants would grow back eventually anyways, so it wasn't really that big of a deal.
When the two girls got close enough to the cabin, they heard shouts. "They're back!" Chiyo yelled, being the first one to rush down the front porch steps and greet Haruna and Kanako. Without warning, she took them both into her arms. "I'm soooo glad you're safe!" she said. "T-That's great Chiyo, b-but-" Kanako began. "Y-You're squeezing out... all the air in our lungs..." Haruna finished. "Oops!" Chiyo said, letting them go. Once released, Haruna looked to see Mayu, Itsuki and Jasmine coming toward them as well. Standing motionless just next to the porch was Michi.
Haruna glared, making a beeline for the girl. "Huh? Haru-chi, where're you going now?" Chiyo asked. Haruna didn't answer, instead marching straight up to Michi. And then, Haruna shoved her hard, causing Michi to fall over and land just before hitting the porch railing. "What the hell is wrong with you?" Haruna said harshly. "That's what I should be asking you!" Michi yelled back. "Don't you realize you're the reason Kanako ran out there?! Don't you even care?!" All of the commotion brought the other girls over. Meanwhile, Michi smirked.
"The better question is why do you care so much? What, are you in love with Kana-chan or something?" Rage boiling over, Haruna formed a fist and lunged at Michi. "Wah! Haru-chi, no!" Chiyo exclaimed, rushing in to grab Haruna. Jasmine took the other side, and together each gal had an arm, holding back the very angry Haruna. At the same time, Michi continued to sit on the ground. Currently, she was momentarily stunned, not by a blow, but by Haruna's reaction. Michi had only intended to dig at Haruna a little with that remark before following it up with another jab. However, considering how strongly Haruna had reacted, Michi had been taken aback. So taken aback, in fact, that it caused a fleeting thought to cross Michi's mind: Was she right? Was Haruna actually in love with Kanako? However, just as soon as she thought of that, Michi sent those questions away. It was impossible, she told herself. There was no way that could be true.
But, even though she told herself that, Michi's instincts betrayed her. She felt disgust and fear at the idea, and before she knew it, she was running for the door. Dashing through and up the stairs, Michi ran into a room at random before slamming and locking the door.
With the immediate threat gone, Haruna relaxed, although she was still seething. "Come on Haru-chi, chill out," Jasmine said, still hanging on to her. "Yeah girl, you'll pop a blood vessel being that tense," Chiyo jumped in. Finally, Haruna let out a breath she didn't know she had been holding. "Fine. Whatever," she muttered. Satisfied enough that Haruna wouldn't go charging after Michi, Chiyo and Jasmine let go. "Well, let's just all get some rest. It's been a long night so far for all of us, but I'm sure you're pretty tired out huh Kana-chan?" Chiyo said. Kanako nodded. So, the girls all decided to head back inside, both exhausted and relieved that the night was ending without (much further) incident.
End of Chapter Eighteen.