"I know! If taiji were alive, she wouldn't have let that happen to me. She would have fought you and everyone and wouldn't have sent me away like you did. She fought with my mother once, when she wanted to send me to boarding school. She would have fought with you too." speaks Mishti with determination and wipes her tears away. She is about to walk out of the room, but stops, turns around and says
"Was I really not worth it? Haan Dadi? Was it so easy to let go of me? To not love me?" cries Mishti, looking towards her grandmother. Devyani is about to say something but Mishti walks out and leaves Devyani heartbroken. While Rajshri and Bhabhima take care of heartbroken and sobbing Devyani, Abir goes behind Mishti.
Abir frantically looks for her in the house but she is nowhere to be found. He knows his angry chorni now needs him more than ever. Truth to be told, he needed her as much. He had to make sure she was in front of his eyes, safe and sound. Afterall, she was his oxygen. As he is looking for her, he notices that the front door is open. He is about to rush out of the house when he is stopped by Kunal. Abir informs Kunal to go to his room and look after the boys and that he is going after Mishti. Upon being asked the reason, Abir told him he doesn't have the time to go into any details as he needs to look for Mishti. But he will let him know once he gets a chance. Kunal understands Abir and lets him go. Abir requests Kunal to not inform anyone about this, especially not Kuhu. Kunal nods in agreement and Abir leaves.
On the other hand, Rajshri is trying to calm down Devyani, who is constantly apologizing for her actions and how it would have hurt Mishti and this family. She apologizes on behalf of Naman, who constantly troubled them. Rajshri kept reminding Devyani that she had nothing to feel sorry for but Devyani was heartbroken today. Even if she wasn't responsible for anything else, she knew she was responsible for hurting her granddaughter. Truth to be told, she somewhere knew that Mishti would be very upset. But now that she had to finally face her anger, she knew she wasn't ready for that either. Some accusations were right and some were wrong. But she knew it didn't matter. She now understands that she could have handled this situation in a better way. "But would it matter now? After 14 years? Would Mishti ever be able to forgive her?". She thought she could handle her grandchild's anger but with her questions and accusations constantly reverberating in her ears, it was getting harder for Devyani to face it. She had to do something. She just didnt know how and what!
After making sure Devyani was ok, Rajshri decides to leave the room and contact Abir. But before she could call him, she ran into Vishambhar. Knowing his wife well, Vishambhar could easily read his wife's face. He knew something was wrong and requested her to be honest with him. Understanding that there was no point in hiding anything from him, Rajshri shares everything that transpired between Mishti and Devyani. Vishambhar was upset. He knew that his daughter's past still did affect her. But he had no idea that they were still very fresh. "Where did I go wrong? What did I not do? Why was I not able to heal my daughter?", thinks Vishambhar, being worried sick for his daughter. He wanted to anyhow talk to Mishti but Kunal, who had happened to hear that entire conversation comes and calms them down. He told them what he knew about Abir going behind Mishti and that his bhai will bring his bhabhi home. He promised to inform them as soon as he heard something back from Abir.
Following his intuitions, Abir went in search of Mishti towards the market, their usual tea stall spot. And there she was! Sitting on the bench, lost in her thoughts. Her back was facing him. He slowly started walking towards her. He had so much to say to her but words were constantly playing a war in his mind. He just didn't know where he should start. Abir tries practising sentences before approaching her but nothing seems to make sense to him. He only found slapping himself for coming up with stupidest ideas at this time. He just thought to not beat around the bush anymore and directly just apologize. As he slowly approached her, Mishti could sense him coming from the back. She straightened her back as she senses the decrement in the distance between them.
"Mishti....." says Abir with a lot of guilt and shame.
"Abir, please leave me alone. I don't have any energy anymore to talk to you or anyone" says Mishti, trying to be as calm as possible. And that broke Abir's heart. He suddenly became 'anyone' from being the most important man in her life. It killed him but he knew somewhere he deserved it. Especially after today.
"Mishti, I know you are mad at me. And you have all right. And I am here to..." as Abir continues to speak Mishti interrupts, "Not now Abir. Not now. Please just leave me alone."
"No Mishti. I can't leave you alone like this. Please just hear me out" begs Abir.
Mishti stands up with frustration and "Why? Why cant you leave me alone? You were easily able to leave me alone at the resort today." Abir looks down with shame as Mishti continues to get mad.
"I know. It was extremely stupid from my end. I was being a jerk. I am sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you" Abir, desperately wanting Mishti to understand him.
"Oh of course you didn't mean. No one means to hurt me. It just happens. Because, I am not understanding. Or better yet, I am so immature that I always fail at understanding people's hidden intentions and agenda's. You know what Abir? Dadi probably was right about me. Maybe she knew I would turn out this way. Maybe she knew I would never ever understand what a family means and hence she threw me out like that. Maybe I always meant to be alone. Maybe I was always meant to be misunderstood. Or maybe I just don't understand anything. I was right about relationships being temporary. Relationships, love, promises are always temporary. Everything is fake. And everyone is right about me. I am a home breaker." blabbers Mishti in anger. Abir tries his best to stop Mishti but Mishti doesn't stop and finally Abir loses his cool, holds her hand and pulls her into a tight hug. Mishti tried her best to get off the hold but Abir was holding her way too tightly. She slowly calms down on fighting against his hug. Abir loosens his hold but still tight enough to make sure she stays still in that moment. He slowly breaks the hug, cups her face. Her eyes breaking with red hot tears, not wanting to look towards him. He makes sure she looks him into his eyes and says
"Mishti, you are anything but a homebreaker. I know whatever you said right now was in anger and you didn't mean anything. But still whatever you said about yourself is wrong. I messed up yaar. And I am extremely sorry about it. And even if I have to say sorry for this, for the rest of my life, I will. But please don't berate yourself. You know you mean the world to me. You know I love you the most. Please don't hurt yourself like this! Please" begs Abir with tears in his eyes and slowly touches her forehead with his.
Mishti just sobs silently. Suddenly, her vision starts getting blurred. She doesn't realize whether it's her tears or something else. Her head feels light and she just passes out on Abir's shoulder. Abir, shocked with her fainting on his shoulders, picks her up and carries her in his arms. He decides to take her to Rajvansh Sadan as it would just freak people out in the Maheshwari house. As soon as he brings her home, Jugnu who is about to retire notices them and runs for help. Abir asks Jugnu to call their family doctor and asks him to not disturb anyone unless it's absolutely necessary. Abir knows his mom far too well. He knew if she were to find out, she would make sure the news reached Maheshwari Sadan in a matter of seconds. And he wanted to be the one to inform Rajshri and Vishambhar.
Until the doctor arrived, Abir was pretty restless. He kept calling Mishti out. He kissed her hands, forehead, cheek out of desperation. Kept rubbing her hands. He just wanted her to be ok. He pulled her into a side hug and kept on caressing her upper arms. He cursed himself for being so stupidly ignorant towards this. Especially when he knows her fear, he should have been more careful. He just kept praying to his partner to make sure she regains her consciousness soon. Abir was ready to bear any punishment but just couldn't even think of losing her. He even accidentally didn't let that thought cross him. He trusted his angry chorni. He was freaking out but he knew his angry chorni won't give up.
As the doctor arrives and checks Mishti, he informs Abir to not be worried about her. He suggests dehydration and stress as possible reasons for her condition. Doctor informs Abir that Mishti should regain her consciousness soon and if she doesn't, he should call him back.
Abir feels relieved and decides to call Rajshri as he knows she will be worried sick for Mishti. As soon as he is about to call, he receives Kunal's call instead.
"Bhai, is everything ok?" asks Kunal with a lot of concern.
"Ya Kunal. Everything is ok. Sorry I was just in the middle of"
"Common bhai. You don't have to say sorry. I know what happened. You told me you would call me once you find Mishti. Since I didn't hear from you for quite some time, I just thought to call and check up on you and see if you needed any help"
"Kunal, you know?"
"Yah Bhai. Actually I overheard the conversation when Badi ma was informing Bade papa. And that's how I know"
"Oh"
"I will go check in their room. Bade papa got very worried when he found out what happened. I am sure they aren't asleep just as yet. Anyways, did you find her? Is she ok?"
"Mishti is ok. She just passed out so I brought her home."
"What? How? Is she ok? Did you call the doctor? What did he say?"
"Relax Kunal. Yah she is fine. Doctor says it's probably because of dehydration and stress. But she should be fine soon and the doctor asked me to make sure to not stress her out for sometime with anything that can stress her."
Listening to that Kunal stops for a second, breathes and says "I am sorry bhai."
"Sorry for what Nanko?" asks a curious Abir.
"When I overheard Badi ma informing Bade papa about today's events, I felt like a jackass. The way I have treated Mishti and called her a home breaker without realizing the damage I was causing her. I was being pathetic and stupid. I just wish I could go back and change that Bhai. I am sorry for causing her so much pain then" finishes Kunal with a lot of guilt and shame.
Abir sighs "Yah man Nanko. You were a big time jackass to her. That is why there were so many times I would try to stop you. Make you see sense. But you wouldn't listen" Kunal looks down with shame. "Anyways, that isn't the concern right now."
"How is it not Bhai?" interrupts Kunal.
"It's because whatever you did, or whatever anyone did, didn't matter to her much. It did affect her but she would never let it get to her. Somehow she managed to move past it. Because she never had any expectations from you. Same like Kuhu and Jasmeet chachi. They keep reminding her of her past but she always tries to move beyond their words and show them that they are wrong. It affected her today and got aggravated because it came from someone she didn't expect. Even after promising her millions of times that I wont leave her alone, I left her alone at the resort. I caused her that pain. She was still trying her best to deal with it but her family came and everything just erupted. So it's not you Nanko. It's me. And I know I have to make it up big time to her"
"But Bhai, I never apologized to her for whatever I did earlier. She just accepted me without any apology. I feel like a blunder right now." rubbing his forehead with his fingers.
"Then apologize to her Nanko. Not me." says Abir sternly.
"Is that Abir? Did he find Mishti?" asks Rajshri as she comes out of her room, followed by Vishambhar.
Kunal nods in agreement and puts the call on speaker and informs Abir about it. "Beta, how is Mishti? Is she ok?" asks the worried father. It's not hidden from anyone that Vishambhar's life resides in Mishti. Losing Akshara at such a young age was heartbreaking for both Rajshri and Vishambhar. Even though Rajshri could show her pain, Vishambhar had silently dealt with it. So for them, getting an opportunity to take care of Mishti, was like reliving Akshara's childhood. It was like getting another chance to bring up Akshara in their way. It wasn't some favor they were doing on Mishti or Singhania's. They were just reliving again with their new daughter, who quickly replaced the void that Akshara left when she passed away. Mishti was their everything. And Abir knew that.
Calming his nerves down, Abir responds, "Yes Bade papa. She is with me. Actually she fell unconscious. I brought her home. I just didn't want to create any panic situation over there. And that's why I didn't bring her there. Umm. But Bade papa, she.. Is fine. Doctor said that it's because of dehydration and stress. But she should regain consciousness soon"
Rajshri and Vishambhar were able to feel Abir's nervousness in his voice. Rajshri asked him if he was ok. This was something he loved about Rajshri and Vishambhar. No matter what situation it is, they would always ensure that both Mishti and him were ok. He was as important to them as Mishti was. He closed his eyes to wish that was the same case with Meenu but he knew that wasn't yet possible.
"Actually Badi Ma. I am sorry. All this is happening because of me" Abir finally confesses out of guilt.
"Beta, but how?" asks a worried mother.
"Badi ma, me and Mishti sort of had an argument. And things happened. I think we weren't able to sort out the differences between us and it just came out in the wrong way in front of Mishti's dadi and Badi dadi. I wish it didn't happen. And I take full responsibility for it. I stretched the fight a bit too much. I shouldn't have. I hurt her and it resulted in this. I am very sorry Badi ma. I am very sorry Bade papa. It's all because of me." Abir confesses with guilt.
Rajshri understands Abir and takes the phone from Kunal and asks Abir to calm down. "Abir, don't blame yourself. This had to happen. Yeah maybe your fight led to Mishti erupting the way she did. If not for your fight, there would have been something else causing it too. And it's because her 14 years of wounds are still not healed. Me and your bade papa were talking about this. We are probably at fault here too. When Mishti first came to our house, we both knew what she felt and how she felt. We both decided that we will shower every ounce of love that we have on her and make sure we heal her and transform her into the amazing woman that she is today. We both thought love was enough. Sometimes we expect love to work as a medicine. And sometimes, it is just acting as a placebo and we don't even realize it. We were able to successfully bring her up into the amazing strong woman she is today. But we were not successfully able to heal her wounds. And now we know why?"
"Why Badi ma?" Abir asks curiously.
"Because we both were just focused on showering her with love. We didn't focus on other factors that were probably hampering her healing process. We avoided paying attention to that. It's like how Devyani behen said today. She was way too focused on protecting Mishti and in that she totally forgot to or ignored making sure that Mishti doesn't feel like she was an outcast from the family. We loved Mishti like there is no tomorrow. But we didn't do anything about other family members not considering Mishti as a part of the family. If we had focused on the bigger picture, things might have been little different"
"Bigger picture?" Abir repeats to himself. "Bigger picture?" He repeats again. He recalls how Mishti once told him on how he was just so focussed on proving his mother wrong that he failed to see they were losing their battle. It was making sense. It was slowly and suddenly making sense. Abir just thanked Badi ma in his response. Rajshri was confused with Abir's sudden reaction.
"Badi ma, now I realize why Mishti always talks to you and Bade papa or thinks about you two whenever she is in some problem. You both have this amazing capability to teach others a lesson with your own. Thank you badi ma. And bade papa, don't worry about Mishti. She will be all ok, with you tomorrow. I promise. You both have brought her up really well. You both know that even when she falls down, she holds the strength to pull herself back up. She will be fine"
Rajshri and Vishambhar assure Abir that until and unless he is there with their daughter, they aren't worried. Abir ends the call with new instilled confidence. He knew what he had to do and how.
He slowly walks into their room and notices Mishti sleeping peacefully. He sits next to her, pulls her into his embrace and keeps caressing her. He just didn't feel like letting go of her. He kept kissing her forehead every chance he got. Honestly, he really wanted her to be awake soon, just so that he could just share whatever he wanted to with her. But he also knew he had to be patient. This would be one heck of a task. He takes out his phone and calls someone.
Mishti, still in Abir's embrace, wakes up and opens her eyes slowly. Abir notices her and is relieved that she is finally up. He kisses her forehead again in relief and offers her some water to drink. Mishti, still trying to make sense of her surroundings, finally starts recalling the events that occurred during the day. And she pulls herself out of Abir's embrace and straightens herself. Abir offers her some food but Mishti denies eating it. Abir warns her for calling and waking up Badi maa and Bade papa if she didn't eat the food. With her sudden fainting and dehydration, there was no way in the world that he was going to let her fast for him tomorrow. Her health was his priority and he will stick to it even when she is mad at him. Mishti ended up eating some food. He knew. Calling Badi maa and Bade papa technique always worked. Even though he hated it, sometimes he had to use it to get his way through his very stubborn wife.
Abir just kept looking towards Mishti and Mishti tried as much as possible to avoid any type of eye contact with him. Abir knew he had no time left to waste anymore. He coughs to get her attention. Mishti knows what exactly he is trying to do and avoids looking towards him. If Mishti was stubborn, Abir was overly stubborn too. He just took her hands in his and spoke:
"Mishti! We should talk." Mishti looks towards him. Her eyes still show anger. She looks away.
Abir tries again "Mishti! at least let me talk. Doctor has asked you to rest. So you don't have to. But at least let me. You can at least hear me out right?"
Mishti looks towards him again and Abir again pleads, "Please Mishti". Mishti takes a deep breath and reminds herself of Badi ma's teaching. "Mishti, always try to sort out the issues. Never hold on to them. Holding onto them will make it worse. Especially in a marriage.". She knows it has never worked with Kuhu but it has with Abir. She finally nods and gives in.
"Thank you Mishti. And firstly, I am sorry. I am extremely sorry. I shouldn't have done what I did today. I was a total jerk. Whatever the issue was, I shouldn't have left you at the resort like that.I just don't know what got into me. Normally, I wouldn't do anything like this. Especially not to you. I just wasn't thinking. I know there is no excuse and I deserve any type of punishment you might have for me. If you don't want to forgive me right now, that's ok too. I just knew I had to apologize. I know I cannot take it back. But I will make sure I never repeat it again. I am sorry Mishti"
Mishti was quietly listening to Abir. Abir was now patiently waiting for her to respond or react. After the stupidity he pulled, it was only fair he gave Mishti the time and space to digest and accept it.
Mishti closes her eyes again and remembers what Rajshri taught her once, right before the wedding. "Mishti. Things are going to change. Even if you feel you know Abir the most, there will be new things you will find out about him. There will be new things you will discover about your relationship. You will fight. You might not even talk for a day or days. Just try and make sure you don't stretch. Don't do anything against your self respect but also don't stretch any fight beyond a certain point and try to find a middle ground. And remember, every fight will teach you something. Learn from it and move on!"
Abir could read Mishti's face. He knew she was still struggling to move past it. She was struggling to find words. He assures her that she can take her time in forgiving him if she wants to. He is about to leave her hand, when she holds it firmly and calls out his name.
"Abir" Listening to his name from her mouth was a feeling of eternity he felt. He longed to hear her voice. Ever since the resort goof up happened, she hadn't once spoken to him. And that was quite unsettling for him even though he knew he deserved it. Mishti calls him again and that brings him back from the chain of thoughts.
"You don't need to take sole responsibility for the fight. I acted up too. I left the argument in between. I shouldn't have. Fights just don't happen in thin air or because of one person. Two people are responsible for this. Maybe I shouldn't have walked out from our argument" says Mishti.
This is something he loved about Mishti. Always ready to see a reason and own up to her mistakes when she knows. But he also knows that he is at a bigger fault. "Even if you walked out Mishti, I shouldn't have left you at the resort. It's not excusable and even if you forgive me for that, I don't know for how long I am going to curse myself for pulling that jerky stunt" Abir being as earnest and apologetic as possible. "But whatever it is, we both now know and understand that whenever a fight happens, we shouldn't walk out on each other no matter how angry we are. If you are doing that, I will remind you and stop you. And if I am doing that, you can use your magenta belt on me to make sure I come back to my senses"
Mishti smiles a little and again corrects him, "brown belt". Oh how much he loved to finally see a smile on her face and loved how she corrected him always. He knew this was one mistake he would knowingly keep repeating and she would keep correcting. It was their thing!
Abir notices Mishti is lost in her thoughts. She probably might want to share it but something could be stopping her.
"Mishti, You don't need to hide anything from me. I know when you were sharing, I reacted stupidly. But that doesn't mean you stop yourself. You can still share what you are feeling with me. And I think you were partly right about Kuhu and about me being obsessed over protecting you from my mom"
"Partly?" asked a confused Mishti!
"Mishti, the mistake we both were making was we both were just too overtly focussed on one factor and thinking it was the only issue that we both had to individually deal with. While I accept and understand that they both are bigger problems on individual levels, if we look at the bigger picture, these two issues are just mere factors to that issue. The issue is totally different and we both didn't think about it. Especially me." Abir notices Mishti getting confused and continues "See! Don't get me wrong. I know and I accept that Kuhu needs to be stopped. We will figure out a way. God knows when we will be able to put sense into her but we will. But putting sense into her isnt going to solve our problem. Or just stopping maa isn't going to stop the problem. It's like what Badi ma said. It will do the work of placebo. Not the medicine. Because the issue is something else"
"What is it?" For the first time Mishti felt as if she wasn't able to read the underlying riddles Abir would leave for her. He was just constantly confusing her.
"It's the fear that you are holding onto Mishti. The fear of being rejected. The fear of not being able to fit in my family" Mishti straightens up and looks down. Abir feels guilty and assures her to not feel ashamed of that.
"Mishti I know you! You desperately want to try and fit and be a part of the family. You don't want anything to go wrong. And you are doing all of that because you love me crazily and want everything to be perfect for me. And unknowingly somewhere, I burdened you with that. I just kept saying I wanted peace in the family and made you feel like shit. But Mish, you are perfect the way you are. You complete me. You are a part of me. And automatically you already became a part of my family. You completed my family. We don't need to prove it to ma or kuhu or anyone that you are any different. You are special." Abir cups her face with his hands and she has tears in her eyes.
"I need to get over my obsession over being the single person responsible for the peace of the family. Our whole family should be responsible for that. Not just us. I know I need to work on it. I may falter but with time maybe I will move on and get past it. But you also need to get past your fears. Mishti. There will be a time where maybe Ma and Kuhu and Jasmeet Chachi would have stopped with their bickering about your past. But the society still might not. I know how strong you are angry chorni. You haven't let those words affect you until you are put in some terrible, overwhelming situation. In fact both of us actually. When ma blackmailed you or when she blackmailed me. When you said yes to Nishant's alliance or when I got jealous because of him. Now that we both go back to those days, we both wish we could have handled the situation better. And this is life Mishti. We both will be put in such situations again where we might just react out of character. And at that point of time, we don't want your fear or my obsession to sway our judgement. We might still make some bad decisions then too but at least we can be rest assured that it's not because of something we have been holding onto for years." Abir says with conviction while Mishti listens to his every word carefully.
"With my obsession I know I need to stop getting bothered by things. It will take some time but I will have to. But with your fear"
"I will try to not hold on to it. I will work on it" interrupts Mishti
"How are you planning to not hold on to it?" asks Abir
Mishti looks towards Abir with confusion. She didn't think so far. She didn't have any response. Abir holds Mishti by her shoulders tightly, and makes her sit on their bed. He sits down on the floor by her side. He holds her hands, looks in her eyes and says
"You know I love you right?"
"Of course Abir. I know"
"Mishti, I know there is a way you can probably get rid of your fears. I am unsure whether you are ready for it right now."
"Abir, why are you beating around the bush? If we have decided to be open with one another, you can just tell me directly"
"It's because I don't know whether you are ready for it"
"No. Please say it"
"Before I say anything, promise me you wont leave the conversation in between. This is just my opinion. I am not going to force it. You will decide whether you want to do that or not. Alright?"
Mishti nods in approval but is still unsure of what is cooking in Abir's mind.
"You should forgive your dadi, Mishti" says Abir and shocks Mishti totally. Mishti takes her hand out of Abir's hold