Chapter 14
Angie's Perspective
"In the end, we all just want someone who chooses us...Over everyone else, under any circumstances."-Unknown
•••••
IN the end, what will we remember? When we are positioned in our casket the essence of our temple surrounding family members, what will matter? The only thing that should matter is love. The love we shared with family, friends, and soulmates. Everyone is destined to find their soulmate no matter how long it may take. All of these questions played out in my head as soft melodies of a vocalist's voice entered my ears. It had only been hours, but it felt as if we were dancing to our own dedicated music on another planet for a few blissful minutes. I was his muse and he was mine. We were meant for one another. The red light hung above us as our bodies continued to move to the rhythm of soft blues music. This was the best time I'd had in months with Jeremy and I didn't want it to end, but like all good things, it had to.
"You know I love you with everything in me right?" Jeremy spoke as my head laid on his firm chest taking in the moment.
"Of course"
We continued rocking from side to side, "I'm sorry for being so hard on you all the time."
"Shh, that's okay baby you don't have to explain yourself."
Growing up without a father took a toll on me. I started helping my mother raise Tia at a very early age. Without a man in the picture, my mother took care of us both on her own, so the idea of having a man to take care of me sometimes put fear in my heart. Fear of the idea that one day Jeremy might pack up and leave me. Jeremy didn't understand that concept, he grew up with both of his parents. They'd been married for over twenty years. Jeremy has seen the happy ending so he knew how to care for a woman and reciprocate love, I knew none of that, though he was teaching me as best as he could.
"Why do you love me so much?" I asked truly curious.
"Do I even have to answer that question, Angie?"
I sighed closing my eyes enjoying the moment of togetherness for as long as I could.
"I was thinking...about our anniversary this year." He spoke.
"Yea"
"How about redoing our ceremony and vows. You know, explaining why we love each other so much again?"
"You really want to do that?" I asked looking up at him with dough eyes.
"Mhm, then I can truly tell you all the reasons why I love you." He took my hand giving it a subtle kiss as I batted my eyelashes.
"I would love that baby. The kids weren't born when we got married and everything was so rushed. It would be great for Jamal to watch us share our vows again."
"Yes, it would."
He swung me around as the crowd started clearing out due to the club soon closing.
"You remember our first date?" Jeremy asked making me giggle.
"How could I forget? Your pants ripped in front of a group of children at a playground and you got registered as a sex offender for an entire month until we went to court and explained the situation to a jury."
"You cried the whole way to the courthouse," Jeremy said shaking his head.
"I thought they were going to lock you up." I pulled onto his waist tighter melting into his torso.
"You ready to go love bug?" He asked, his deep voice booming against me.
"Sure"
He took my hand as we headed for the exit out of the soon to be empty club. Although this night had been magical there had been something I'd been keeping from Jeremy for over the past few days now. Jeremy and I promised to tell each other everything, so keeping any type of secret was never the way to go. I hadn't told him about my recent encounter with Quincy a few days ago. Jeremy was the sweetest guy ever and he hated no man, but if he did it would have been Quincy Hopkins. Of course, I remembered who Quincy was and he knew it too. Not only did we attend high school together, but we had a fling a few years after he graduated from high school.
Back when I had first met Jeremy and we were only boyfriend and girlfriend at the time we went on a two month break during the course of our relationship. Within that time period, Quincy and I were close friends, though he would always try and make a move on me it never led to anything. One night during our break Quincy and I got drunk off of our asses and had meaningless sex. I was vulnerable that night and Quincy was just there. Quincy and I promised it meant nothing, but our blooming friendship ended terribly because of it. After Jeremy and I had gotten back together a few months down the road I came clean about what had gone down with Quincy and me and Jeremy forgave my actions understanding the circumstances. He held a grudge against Quincy though for sharing part in the one thing that was his, me. Telling Jeremy that Quincy approached Jamal and me the other day was going to be difficult, but it had to be done.
We drove home in silence, I got lost in my thoughts as Jeremy focusing on the road.
"Baby," I spoke softly.
"Yes?"
"I have to tell you something."
"Go ahead"
It was now or never.
"You remember the other day when I took Jamal to the park."
"Yes, What? Did something happen?"
"Not necessarily."
"Meaning?" He asked switching lanes.
It was time to get straight to the point.
"You remember Quincy Hopkins?"
He said nothing for a moment before responding, "how could I forget the bastard?"
"Well he was at the park as well that day...and he approached me and Jamal."
His hands grew tighter on the wheel as a frown formed on his handsome face.
"What the fuck do you mean he approached you and Jamal?"
"He said he just wanted to speak to me after all of these years, and he might have been a little flirtatious, but I cut it off as soon as I could walking away from him with Jamal."
The ride grew silent and no other words were exchanged between Jeremy and me during the ride home. When he parked in the driveway he got out of the car leaving me heading inside the house. I tried keeping up with him in heels closing the front door behind me.
"Jeremy," I called after him, he kept ignoring me walking up the staircase.
"Jeremy!" I started taking off my heels feeling the pain from my feet kick in.
"Jeremy! You better fucking answer me!"
He turned around, "stop talking to me like a little boy Angie. I'm not your bitch to push around whenever you get ready." He said cutting me off.
"You're acting like a bitch right now." He turned back around walking back up the staircase ignoring me.
"Jeremy you're acting as if you're threatened by him what is the problem?"
"The problem isn't with him Angie it's with you, I don't give a damn about Quincy!"
"Me?"
"Yes, you have no respect for me."
"What are you talking about Jeremy you sound stupid."
"Like that! You try to control every situation. You always feel the need to be right! And another thing I'm not your son so stop talking to me like that."
I couldn't believe him, he was overreacting.
"You are so weak Jeremy. This is how you handle the situation, throwing a hissy fit, like a coward."
He came downstairs at full force invading my personal space causing me to back up in an instant.
"For the last time stop degrading my character Angie. You know damn well if it was the other way around you would have been pissed too."
"No, I wouldn't."
"Yes you would've and I'm done with this conversation. You should have told me this the day it happened, especially with my son being there. Knowing you two have history."
"Oh my gosh, Jeremy you complain about everything. I'm not perfect for crying out loud."
"I try to give you everything you ask for Angie so that my wife and the love of my life doesn't have to lift a finger. All I ask for in return is some respect. You don't want to have sex, you don't want me to work so much, you don't want to watch the kids for so long. I don't know what the hell you want Angie. It drives me crazy."
I crossed my arms shaking my head, "we're back on the sex train again Jeremy, really?"
"Yes goddammit, I have a right to complain about it."
"We don't have sex because I don't want to! I have too much going on and you know this. I cook, I clean, I take care of your kids twenty-four seven and after doing all of that every single day you expect to come home to me with my legs open for you on a regular basis? Most of the time I'm tired and I refuse to keep stepping back in to the fifties to please you! If you want sex so bad how about taking care of the dishes or cooking some nights? Just give me a break Jeremy!"
I exploded, all of my pent up emotions taking over.
He spoke of no other words walking upstairs slamming the bedroom door so hard a picture fell from the living room wall. I jumped stepping back.
So much for a perfect night to remember...
14
KelisAjanee
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