Afaaf
It was the fourth day.
Without him.
Without Zaryaab.
Yet, it felt like months had passed, years had passed. Decades had crossed and centuries had changed.
Yet nothing changed.
" Suddenly cars had surrounded us. Lala was inside as we two got out to fight the men but we were hit badly. Lala was outside with us then, we tried to fight against the men but lala was hit by someone hard. And then we remember nothing."
This was what I heard from the guards that gained consciousness. And this wasn't helpful. It wasn't enough for tracking down Zaryaab. The whole city's police was finding him, Jahan had special forces looking for him. But still there wasn't any clue of him.
I rocked on my place, hugging myself as my eyes stared at Zaryaab's picture. I couldn't move my eyes away from him.
Allah! Could it not have been me, who was abducted. Why him? Why Zaryaab Alam Khan. It could have been me.
Why Zaryaab?
The search for him was constant. Jahan was everywhere. Sometimes he wouldn't return home for straight eleven hours and sometimes he wouldn't move from in front of Khan Dada and Dadi Gul Jan. Clutching at the old woman's hand as if he was a small child. The security was also tight around the haveli. No one was allowed to meet us, mostly.
I didn't even want to meet anyone, till I saw Zaryaab. Till I knew that he was safe. He had to be safe.
My heart had a feeling that he was near, that he wasn't far. That he was safe. But not close enough that I'd yell for him and he'd hear me. But he was near. It was a gut feeling, gnawing at my skin.
Rain had been pouring on the land since morning. Dark clouds had taken over us. And with each roar of clouds, my heart shivered. Standing before the mirror, I brushed my hair. The strands wet from the quick shower. My brown eyes were swollen and the dark circles were more prominent against my pale skin. The white block print shalwar kameez fitted me perfectly. And as I draped the long dupatta against my shoulder. Zaryaab's smirking face came to my mind. The day he took me out for shopping.
Ughh!
Stepping down the stairs, I casted my eyes around the large house. I could hear Gulroz speak in the hall and so I made my way over to the large room.
" You could give everything to the man and bring Lala back." I went and sat besides Dadi Gul Jan. Her warm hazel eyes staring at me for the longest of hours before she leaned my head on her shoulder.
My eyes staring at the two men. Waiting for Khan Dada to answer Gulroz. The older man, sighed loudly. His wrinkled hands rubbing together as he leaned forward.
" It's not this easy Gulroz. He hasn't come to ask us for anything. And what would he ask for, money? That money isn't even his."
I understood nothing of their rivalry. Yet, Gulroz knew more about it as he nodded and scoffed.
" Its a dirty game." He said.
" It is. He killed his own father for money. Suleman and my son did partnership and invest into many fields. Buying properties around the province, only because they trusted each other. But now when Zaryaab's father isn't alive, Suleman had no other option but to name everything after Zaryaab. Because he knew his son would do nothing good. And now this isn't only about property, Gulroz. It's a war now. That man would use Zaryaab and portray him as his father's killer."
I closed my eyes at his words.
" And I must say he played well. The police is controlled by him. He left no evidence against him, but he wouldn't wait using Zaryaab's visit as one. Against us."
I thought back to the night he was at that abandoned railway station. That night he had ran away from this man, Khan Dada was speaking about.
" I am disappointed. The thin thread of trust and love of decades has been broken by this man's feet." Dadi Gul Jan muttered from besides me.
Khan Dada stood up to leave as a guard came informing that someone wished to talk to him on the phone.
" When did Zaryaab's parents, umm- die?" I asked Dadi Gul Jan unsure.
" Zaryaab was fifteen at that time, and Ronaq was twelve. It was my only son's wedding anniversary and Ronaq had insisted that her father take a small tour with his mother as her gift. So that the two could have some time together. Zaryaab didn't want them to go but-"
I sat straighter now. Seeing Gulroz pass me a small smile.
" But Ronaq was persistent. The couple went out, packing some of their stuff as well for the small tour. They were somewhere near the mountain ranges that land sliding took their lives."
I gasped at the news. My eyes widening.
" Ronaq blamed herself for their death for several years. But she was very lucky that Jahan held her hand."
A lingering silence fell upon us. Each of us getting lost in our own chains of thoughts. I helped Dadi Gul Jan to her room, pulling the blankets over her so that she could rest for a while. I didn't want to return to my room so as I walked further up the stairs. Opening the doors of the main terrace, I felt the cold wind cause goosebumps on my skin.
Walking over to the cage of the pigeons, I stared at them. They were close to Zaryaab. They must be missing him. Tracing the heavy net of their cage, I hooked my fingers through them.
" Bring him back." I said to them as they stilled, making low noises between themselves.
" He isn't very far, I know that. But you little guys can bring him back." I spoke to them.
" Find him."
A beautiful white pigeon flew from it's place near the water tray and came by where my fingers were hooked. I cooed at him.
" Hey, little guy. Won't you go out and look for your friend." With a heavy heart, I dared to unlock the cage's bolt. Opening the door to freedom for them. My heart bleed seeing not a single pigeon make an attempt to escape.
" You are free now, go. Why are you sitting here. Go!" I got no reaction from them. And this brought tears to my eyes.
Closing the cage, I bolted it securely. And leaned against it again. Occupying my previous position.
" You won't leave until he, himself lets you free." I stated.
Seeing the beautiful pigeon.
" You are also waiting for him, I know. You are waiting for Zaryaab." I nodded my head.
" Afaaf-" a breathy voice interrupted me and I whipped towards the man seeing him bent on his knees as he tried to catch his breath.
" Jahan" he looked him. His amber eyes smiling.
" I found him."
The words cracked through my body, piercing my skin and then my heart until it bleed red. And then the words twined with my soul and I took a large gulp of breath as if I was alive again. And it was my first breath ever. Suddenly my legs seemed weak and I feared that they'd give out from under me and I'd fall. They were turning jelly.
" Sacchh?" (Really) I asked the man.
Seeing him nod and then he was turning around descending the stairs. I rushed after the man seeing him almost disappear.
" Jahan. Wait. I'll come with you." I skipped stairs to meet his steps.
" Don't be silly Afaaf." The man groaned.
" Please. Please. I want to go with you." I almost begged as the man entered his room. I had never been in his room before, but I didn't get distracted as he opened his drawer and rummaged through.
" Please take me with you."
He pulled out a gun and stuffed it his belt on the back. I gulped at the sight of the weapon and nonetheless got over it.
" Do you even hear what you're saying. It could be very dangerous for you. Anything could happen to you." He snapped and I froze.
" And if anything happened to you, Zaryaab would burn me alive." He joked brushing me off but I didn't even concentrate on it.
" Please, I beg of you."
" You don't get it. It's a very dangerous situation for you. The condition could get even worse." He said softly this time but I wasn't having it.
" Please, take me with you." I tried one last time. But the man shook his head.
I tried not to do it. I tried to stop myself but everything stopped on Zaryaab. I didn't want to do it. But he left me no other option. Reaching over to the photo frame, I showed it to Jahan seeing his eyes stare at it. The woman's beautiful features bringing tears in his eyes as he looked up at me. I was risking everything of his.
" Please, for Ronaq's sake."
-
The guards were left back home for patrolling and some were already sent to the location. By the time we left the premises of the haveli, it was raining again. And I was mentally preparing myself. Fear was coiling around me every single second.
Jahan had said it very straightforward that I could expect anything. And I knew that I had already signed away my life for war.
The roads were uneven having puddles between them. The rain was no good at the moment as Jahan drove his black sleek car. The bumps having the ride more uncomfortable.
Jahan was quiet, I thought he was calculating something in his mind with the lines on his forehead. And I turned my head to the window, seeing trees and mountains surround the road.
We weren't in the city anymore but on abandoned pathways. I kept reciting all duas I knew. Jahan took a turn in the woods and I sucked a deep breath in. He parked the car before killing the engine. He unbuckled his seat belt and then turned towards me.
" I am taking you back home." I gave him a sharp glare and shook my head.
" Let's go get Zaryaab." I opened my door.
" Afaaf- just be very silent." I nodded following after the man. An under construction two storey building came into our view. It was awfully deserted and incomplete. My heart was bumping blood erratically. Shivers running through my body.
We entered the building, a pungent smell wafted past my nostrils and I resisted the urge to throw up. Looking at the fungi covering wall on our opposite side. It was dark inside. But I could feel movement. Jahan was messing with his phone.
" Shit! The forces are unable to receive my message. It's the signal problem." He groaned as I looked at him with fearful eyes. He turned his phone on the silent mode before taking the lead. I followed closely behind him.
We heard voices speaking and so stilled. Jahan turned to look at me and I gulped. We walked together towards where the voices were coming from.
The voices were getting close now.
Dim light illuminated the dark hallway as we hid behind the wall of the hall. As the voices cleared out completely. Jahan was tensed besides me.
And then, I felt it.
My neck sweated. Chills running down my spine as the loud voice boomed around the deserted place. Bile rose at the back of my throat. My feet lead me to the edge of the wall as I stood there staring ahead at the man.
A sickening feeling attacking my body as tears stung my eyes hearing the man grit the words out. And my heart lurched in my mouth. I knew the voice. I knew it very well.
It couldn't be.
No.
It couldn't be.
Not him.
It couldn't be him.
***
Ughh!!