The whole drive home Breckyn slept with her hand reaching behind her, clutching Thomas's car seat. I smiled as I looked in the rearview mirror and saw her hand holding Thomas's. He was gripping Breckyn's index finger. His hands were so tiny. His little fingers made me so happy. The poor kid got my wonky fingers. If that is the only thing my son got from me, I'll be happy with that. I grinned to myself as I remembered bringing Winnie home for the first time. Nancy had done the same thing, hold Winnie's little hand the whole ride home.
I put my eyes back to the road and continued home. I don't think I ever drove over 15 miles an hour on the way home. I hate driving through Manhattan but I really hate it when I have precious cargo on board. I heard Thomas give out a small cry asI heard Breckyn sigh when she let go of his hand as she leaned over in the seat and put her head on my shoulder and snuggled into my neck. Boy did I have precious cargo with me today. Thomas began to cry a little louder so I reached my hand behind me and put my index finger in his hand. I felt him wrap around my finger. Immediately, my heart swelled. I let out a hearty laugh and shook my head in disbelief. I don't know what I possibly did to deserve this but I would do it a million times over just to relive this moment one more time. I sighed as I took a deep breath in and kissed her head. I could smell my shampoo and couldn't help but shake my head at her. She must have snuck that into her delivery bag without telling me but I didn't mind. I caught on to the fact that she used my shampoo about 6 months ago. I would have to run out and by more shampoo about a week and half after buying a bottle. It got to the point where I just bought the biggest size they had. I never told her I caught on. I just replaced what was used and let it be her little secret. Besides, I was afraid that if she knew I knew she would stop doing it and to be honest, it made me feel wanted and it was one of the things I loved most about her. She might not be the most vocal person in the world and sometimes that gets to me because- well- I am man of words and I wear my heart on my sleeves.
But Breckyn? Well... Breckyn wears her heart on my sleeves as well. The sleeves of my plaid button ups that she steals from me to wear to bed, to the store, or just around the house. She steals them thinking I will never know, but I find her hair on my shirts all the time while I'm sitting in on writer meetings. Just like when she steals my shampoo, just the way she'll hum a song while she's in the shower but she won't completely sing aloud if she knows that I'm aware of it and it drives me absolutely bananas. She steals my pillows and the truck when she thinks I won't notice. How could I not notice? She never remembers to put the seat back to where I fit so I feel like I'm sitting chest to steering wheel. The mirrors are all messed up and the station is on country. She may not wear her heart on her sleeve in the way I do, but she steals my heart with each lingering glance she throws in the mirror when she thinks I cant see her while I'm shaving. She is so self conscious when she has no reason to be. I know most of her problem lies within the fact that she was abused and used by a pathetic excuse of a man. I know she thinks she's not good enough. I know she doesn't feel like she is worthy of love, and not just mine, anyone's and that kills me.
I looked down at her drooling on my shoulder and couldn't help but smile. Just one of the many things I've grown to love about this amazing woman. I hadn't realized she drooled until the second time we stayed together. That first night in the hotel, she kept her distance, but the second. The second time, I got to see her in all her glory while she was sleeping. Snoring like it was going out of style and drooling up a storm at her parents house. She looked stunning, even then. As I drove out of the city limits and off towards the Hamptons towards our house, my mind began to reminisce about all our times together. Thomas was cooing in the back ground as I lost myself in my all time favorite memory.
********
"Good mono rehearsal, Jim. I think they are going to like all those jokes. Nothing flopped so that's a plus." Higgins was walking beside me as we walked down the hallway to our offices.
"Yeah, I'm not real sure about the mathematic equation bit but hopefully it will do well. The rehearsal audience sure got a kick out of a few of the problems. I just hope it doesn't flop with the live audience, but, I'm gonna eat something real fast and then head to hair and make up. See you in about an hour or so?" I reached into my pocket for my phone to check and see if Breckyn had texted me and felt the envelope and pulled it out.
Higgins smiled at me and clapped my back. "You know it. I'll be ready for my close-up Mr. Fallon." I looked down at the envelope and ran my thumb over the way she wrote my name on it. I scoffed with a smile when I saw she had scribbled out Mr. Fallon, then Jimmy Fallon, and then just finally finished by putting Jimmy on the front of the envelope. Too cute.
"OOOOOH. Does someone have a secret admirer?" Higgins grabbed the letter out of my hand. I immediately reached for it. "No. Come on. It's just a letter from that girl I helped the other night. Her trip got cut short, she had a family emergency. I'm sure all this is a thank you for taking care of her. Now, give it back! You know how I am about stuff that fans give me, Higs."
Higgins took the letter and put it up to his nose. "Certainly doesn't smell like a thank you note. You should know what those are like by now. You write them every Friday." He held the letter above my head and shook it. I jumped up and grabbed it out of his hand. Higgins laughed as I grabbed it and pushed him into his office. "Not cool, man."
"Have fun reading your love letter." Higgins giggled as he shut his door. I walked into mine. "HA HA very funny Steven!" I kicked my door shut and walked over to sit down at my desk. I reached over to my mini fridge and grabbed out a yogurt and a spoon. I clicked on my emails and refreshed them as I opened the container in front of me, sticking my spoon in and grabbing a bite.
I still had the spoon in my mouth as I responded to an email from Justin asking me when I was planning on having him down for Timberweek. I missed that dude. I quickly looked at my calendar, blocking off a week in December for him. I responded back the dates for him and closed out. The rest could wait. I grabbed the pink envelope off my desk and stuck my index finger under the flap, tearing it open across the top. Higgins was right, I did catch a whiff of a familiar scent. It must have been sitting in with her clothes or something. It smelled like her. I smiled as I opened the letter and began reading what I could only expected to be a thank you note. She was too sweet for writing this. I actually kind of missed her being around. I could have used a fresh face today in that rehearsal to let me know if the jokes really landed or not. I wonder what she was doing now. I wonder if she made it to the airport okay. I pulled out my phone. "I hope you made it okay. Please be safe, Breckyn. I have to go tape the show. Call me when you land- Jimmy" I took a spoonful of yogurt and began reading.
Jimmy,
I just wanted to thank you for everything that you have done for me these last few days. It means more to me than you'll ever know. Thank you for saving me from hurting myself badly on those dreaded steps. I am such a clutz. Thank you for being gracious even after I yelled at you like a crazed woman for merely helping me.
I couldn't help but smile at the beginning of this letter. I closed my eyes and just like that I was seeing her fall in front of me all over again. I saw the way she just landed in my arms, almost delicately and with grace, as if she were meant to land there. I smiled as I opened my eyes and continued reading.
Thank you for being a gentleman and staying with me to ensure that I was okay. Thank you for being a gentleman and mostly, thank you for listening to my story. You are such an amazing listener and supporter. You are the kindest man I have ever known in my 30 years. I barely know you, but I already know that the connection I had with you is unlike any other I have ever had.
Now she was just being too sweet. I was only doing what any other person would have done. She was hurt. She was alone in a unfamiliar city and she was in distress. I would hope that someone would have done that same for me. Besides, she listened to my story, too. It was the least I could do. She was right about the connection. From the beginning, I felt as if she were someone that I almost felt comfortable telling anything to. So I did. I mean, I told her about Nancy and almost no one knows about her. She just... listened. In my line of work, I never get that. Hell, even in life no one just listens to you anymore. I'm so used to everything I say becoming a headline or a quote on the internet that I was taken aback by someone just listening to me and I mean really listening. She was a breath of fresh air and she was so easy to talk to. It was like I had known her my whole life. It wasn't until this very moment I realized that I worried so much about keeping her safe these last two days that I didn't even notice that is what she was doing for me. And never in a million years, would I have expected what would happen next as I continued with the letter.
I know that the bridges that I've burned along the way have left me with these walls and these scars that won't go away and opening up has always been the hardest thing. Until you came. You made it so much easier for me to stop running and to be myself. You comforted me and made me feel safe. This feeling Im feeling is something I've never known. I love when you tell me that Im beautiful when I just wake up. I love how you tease me when I'm moody, but its never too much. I'm falling fast, but the truth is I'm not scared at all. You climbed my walls. Maybe you don't feel the same. Maybe you didn't feel anything at all. I don't regret kissing you, because I felt something there. I felt a connection unlike any other. I know its crazy. It had only been hours, but I don't regret doing that. And I would regret it for the rest of my life if you didn't know how you made me feel. I know it sounds crazy. If you don't feel the same, then that's fine but you have to know that you get through to me like no one else ever has. You cut right through me. I cant explain it. I didn't plan on that happening. It just did. You make me feel safe and you drive me crazy but there it is. I know you can't do this right now. I know you aren't ready. I know that the media cant know but now you know. I know you just met me and you cant possibly feel the same. You cant possibly care for someone who you just met. You don't have to reciprocate and personally, It would be crazy if you were emotionally invested. But I couldn't leave without saying these words to you. Thank you for letting me in on your life, no matter how brief. Thank you for confiding in me and thank you for sharing your greatness, if only for a fleeting moment.
I felt like the wind had been knocked out of me and like I was finally breathing again all at the same time. My mind was racing and yet I was thinking clearly for the first time in years. Like I was blind and I could finally see.
I just want to thank you for listening, and supporting me, and for not judging me. Thank you for the comfort and safety that you made me feel. You have saved me in more ways than you could ever know and for that I am truly grateful. You are an amazing man. What you do matters. I promise you that. It got me out of the hellhole and it brought me here and for that I am truly grateful.
Breckyn.
I set the letter on the desk and smoothed it out until it was completely flat. I started to rub my temples as I read her words, over and over and over again. By the 6th time it was no longer my voice in my head reading it, it was hers. It was so clear in my head, like she was sitting right across from me. What I would give to have her sitting across from me right now... I looked down at the way she signed her name, I traced it with my index finger and lingered on the small loop she made at the end of the n.
I closed my eyes and put my face in my hands. What was happening? Before today, I was fine. Well, I wasn't fine but I was functional. I got through the day. Sometimes I didn't know how I did it, but I did. I was doing just fine. When I had Winnie, I thrived. When I didn't, I survived. And now? Well now.. Gosh. I took a deep breath in. That was a mistake. My hands smelled like her. What was that scent? A flower of some type. I shook my head and rubbed my hands down my face
What did she mean by this? Do I really know her better than anyone else? She cant be doing this to me. She counted on me, she told me secrets. Shit. I told her my secrets. I rubbed my hand through my hair. I'm not mad that she wrote this, I just want to know WHY she wrote this. Was it hot in here? Jesus. Did they have the heat on full blast? I was sweating. Its stuffy in here. I stood up and looked at the thermostat. 68. That's what it always is. Why is it so hot? Gosh, I loosened my tie. . My heart was racing. My palms were sweating. My mind was all... cloudy. I had only felt this way one other time in my life. I was so certain of that feeling then but feeling this all over again sent me reeling. How is it that two days ago I didn't know she even existed and now I can't imagine life without her? But that is exactly what I was going to do because she was gone.
I felt this urge to talk to her. To let her know that I read it. I pulled out my phone and went to call her. I noticed the time. 4:15. Shit. I was late to hair and make up. I ran down the hall and threw the letter on my desk in my dressing room and put my phone in my pocket. I still couldn't breathe. I had butterflies in my stomach and a knot in my throat. This was not pre-show jitters. This was...
I shook my head. I didn't know what this way but I do know I had a job to do. I just didn't know how well I could do it.
The show went on without a hitch but I absolutely have no idea how it happened. The whole time, the entire show, all I thought about... was her. Her piercing green eyes, the way her hair fell past her shoulders with one single wave, the way she looked while she was getting ready this morning, and the way she watched me when I was helping her with her hair. I swear, I kept putting my hands to my lips during the show just so I can smell those floral hints on my finger tips. I didn't even shower before the show just so I could keep that just a little longer. Finally, during the musical performance I shot a text to Higgins.
I need to talk to you, asap. Not doing high fives tonight. Just... meet me in my dressing room.
Higgins was bouncing his knees to the beat and looked down at his pant pocket. He pulled his phone out and read the message. He looked up at me with a concerned look on his face. I just nodded and pointed to the door to my dressing room. He slowly nodded and put his phone back in his pocket, leaning over to talk to Miles. Miles shot a look at me and I just held up a thumbs up sign saying I was good. He nodded and spoke to the other writers. Everyone seemed okay with it.
I struggled through my goodbyes and had Miles address the audience as Higgins and I walked into my dressing room from the hidden door. Higgins closed the door behind him and turned to face me.
"What's going on here?" He said as he walked towards me. I was wringing my hands together and pacing back and forth. "I don't know." I replied. He chuckled and guided me to my chair. "Come on, James. I know when something is wrong. Especially since you didn't do high fives. You always do high fives. Now what is it? What did you need to talk to me about?"
I sat down and took a deep breath. "You know that letter you teased me about before? From the girl I helped the other day?" Steve smiled and loosened his tie. "Oh you mean your loooooove letter. What was her name anyways?" I sighed and loosened my tie as well. Just the mention of her name and the butterflies were back. "Breckyn. Breckyn Jones. Anyways, you were right, Higs. It WAS a love letter."
Higgins stopped messing with his tie and dropped it. "What? Oh man. I was just kidding Jimmy. I... I didn't actually think it was an actual love letter. What did it say? Was she like... a crazed fan? Is she.. is she okay, I mean... we don't have to worry about anything do we?"
I put my hands up and took a deep swallow. "Yeah. I think we do. But... not.. not in that way.. It ... it wasn't like that." I saw Higgins sit up straighter and clear his throat. "Okay... what do you mean, Jim?" I sighed and leaned back in my chair. I looked up at the ceiling and counted all the spackle bumps. "Gosh, where do I start?" I sighed as I looked down, finally making eye contact with Steve.
"At the beginning, preferably." Steve was serious now. I sat forward and played with my tie. "This is serious, Higgins. I.. I don't know what to do here. I-I'm speechless, man." Higgins sat up and put his hand on my knee. "Whoa. This is serious. You? Speechless? This is as serious as it gets."
I took a deep breath. "For the first time in my life... I cant form the words to even comprehend what is going on up here, man. I got... nothing. Nothing." I crossed my arms in front of me to signal that there was nothing I could do. That's when Higgins stood up and looked around.
"Well, wheres this letter? Can I read it?" I walked over to my desk and picked up the letter. I stared at it for a moment, trying to decide if i should show it to him or not. I looked up and saw the concern in his face. The same concern I had seen from him so many times before. He was really such an amazing support system through all this. If I was going to share this letter with anyone, it'd be him. "You don't have to show me if you don't want to, Jim. But this girl has you so flustered. I noticed it the entire show tonight, don't think I didn't. I can only imagine what is on that piece of paper."
I passed the letter on to him. He grabbed it in his hand and tried to pull it but I couldn't let it go, like Winnie with her security blanket. I felt the paper tear ever so slightly and immediately let it go. I watched Higgins' eyes move back and forth and his lips mouth the words as he read. I crossed my hands over one another and played with my wedding), a nervous tick that I still couldn't crack. One many, really. The wedding ring almost felt constricting now. I was more aware that I was wearing it and it almost felt foreign to me. The entire time I was with Breckyn I had forgotten about this whole divorce fiasco. I was tired of having to hide the truth. I was tired of lying. That had to change and soon. Higgins lips slowed as he continued to read. By the time he finished reading his mouth was wide open. He dropped the letter down, hitting his leg. "Now I get it. Completely. And you feel the same way?" I nodded slightly.
"I felt it. This morning, when she kissed my lips.. and I felt it." He nodded at me while he re-read a little of the letter before looking up to meet my gaze."How did it feel?" he asked me as he made eye contact. I felt like his eyes were going to bore through me.
"It made.... It made me feel alive." I shuffled my feet and played with the button on my jacket. I let my gaze fall to the floor to watch the light from the fluorescent bulbs bounce off the shine on my Italian dress shoes. Steve cleared his throat and I returned my eye contact to him. Wow. I could tell by the look on Steve's face that he wasn't surprised by that revelation but I certainly was. I cant believe I said that. He went to talk but I held my hand up to stop him.
"Before you say anything, believe me, for the last three hours, I've been trying to get her out of my head. Ive tried to pretend that this is some weird... post separation, needing to be around someone, glitch but its not working." Steve raised an eyebrow at me and pointed the letter to me. "Do you want it to work?" I had no idea what he meant.
"Higs, I don't have any answers right now. That's why I brought you in here to talk to me. Cant you understand that?" Steve folded the letter up and held it in his hands, shaking it around. "Jim, the only reason why you don't have answers right now is because you've been too scared to ask yourself the right questions."
"What do you mean?" I was so confused as to where Higgins was getting at but I was hoping he was going to make his point soon. He walked over to me, handing me the letter before putting his arms on mine, slightly shaking me, like he was trying to talk some sense into me, somehow.
"You know how she feels and you know how you feel but somehow you've managed to miss the point because the point is not how SHE feels its how YOU feel. So how do you feel? I cant be the one to give you this answer, Jim. Not this time. So I guess the real question is what are you going to do about it?" I squinted my eyes at him and threw my hand to my chest. "Me? What am I going to ..." I shook my head. "Do?"
"Yeah, Jim. DO. What are you going to do about this? Clearly, I mean.. you have to do something or this will just eat away at you. I know you, Jimmy. You can't let this girl go without doing something." I shook my head and walked over to the mirror and looked at myself. I was sweating and my face was flushed. I haven't been like this in a long time. I turned to him and leaned against the make up desk.
"You know, I don't think you understand the reality of this situation. If I was actually to do something about this, there is an extreme possibility that my world, our worlds would turn upside down, and life as we know it would cease to exist. In fact, I'm willing to bet that this would all come crashing down, just like it has oh so many times before. This girl is amazing. There isn't a single subject on this earth that she doesn't have an opinion about. Its mind boggling. The girl is really smart and she's usually right and when she does argue it comes from this really beautiful and pure place. How can you fight that? Especially when you're a smart ass like me. "
Higgins stood up and helped me straighten up my tie. He tightened it back up and smoothed out the shoulder of my suit. He ruffled my hair and looked into my eyes. "Look, James. In my experience... and I have experience.. You don't come around that many people who will give you butterflies. Who will make you forget everything that should be happening. Who will make you change your whole routine. Who will render you speechless. You just don't. If you don't tell this girl how you feel. Well... it will be like spending the rest of your life in your own personal hell. And you've been through hell. You've seen it all. You've been through it and somehow you came out the other side, scathed but still there. Still you. Somehow. And I for one cant watch you live through that again. I wont let you. So.. go. Go to her. Now. Before she gets on that plane and its too late."
I felt him tap my cheek as I caught myself running my hands over and over the way she wrote my name. "What am I supposed to do Higgins? She's gone. She's at the airport, probably getting on her flight soon. What time is it anyways?" I looked up at the wall. 7. "Her flight leaves in 45 minutes and I'm in downtown Manhattan and she's already at JFK. I would never make it in time and even if I did what am I supposed to do? Just drive to the airport and run to those monitors on the wall and find her flight? Then start praying that she hasn't gotten on the plane yet and run down the terminal yelling her name? All while making an ass out of myself, jumping over chairs and luggage only to finally getting her attention right before she gets on the plane minutes after the final call for the flight has been announced? Is that what I'm supposed to do, Higs? Cause this ISNT the movies. That's not how that works. Once I get there what am I supposed to say? I'm sorry I was an ass earlier. How do you say I couldn't stand to watch you leave earlier because I'm falling for you? Am I falling for her? I don't even know, Higgins. How do you explain something you don't know? Do I tell her everything? Do I tell that for the first time in my life I don't feel like I have to be THIS-" I grabbed my suit jacket and pulled it out towards Higgins, feeling the fabric tighten on my back until I let go, letting it fall back to its original state. I put my arms out and motioned around the room and then put my hands through my hair. "Guy. I don't need to be Jimmy Fallon. There's no pressure to live up to any standards. I can just be-" I sighed and put my head down. "Jimmy, man. I can just be Jimmy." I bit my lip and looked up at him. "Plus, people don't know about the divorce yet. I can't just go say those things to Breckyn and make her stay. I can't just bring her into this and then hide her. I can't do it. She deserves better than that because she-" I stopped talking and Higgins just stared at me. "She what, Jim?"
I began pacing. "Nothing. You wouldn't understand." He grabbed my elbow and stopped me from pacing. "Stop. You don't know if I will understand or not. So try me." I put my hand to my mouth and took a deep breath. "She just makes me feel something I haven't felt before. I wanted to tell her that earlier. I wanted to tell her that when she kissed me but, it would have been terrible if it didn't work out, so I kept quiet. I love Nancy. She's a good woman. Kind. Smart. Funny. Gorgeous, but she's no Breckyn." I put my hands in my pocket. "What do I do? Do I just tell her that? That's crazy. I can't just tell her that?"
"I know you dont want to be THIS guy but you ARE this guy. You might just want to be Jimmy but right now you ARE Jimmy Fallon and if anyone can get to the airport on time to catch a girl, just like in the movies, its Jimmy Fallon. Use that to your advantage for once in your stinking life, Jim! Maybe you go and you tell her and she doesnt want you. OR maybe you go and she's already gone and on the plane. Or maybe you go and you tell her exactly what you just told me and its everything she ever wanted to hear and its everything you ever wanted to say and there's your happy ending but you will never know if you dont stop your rambling and get your ass in your truck and leave now. You go and you say what you feel and you say it with fear in your voice, with raw emotion in your voice but you say it with confidence too because you only get one chance at this and you cant let that go because you feel all those things. You leave it all out there. You can be scared, you can be nervous and you can feel like you cant do this but you say it. Because if you dont, well, if you don't, you will live your life wishing you could come back to this exact moment in time and run out that door and make an ass out of yourself because at least you would have tried. So please, save you and me the next 30 years of heartache and just take your keys-" He put my keys in my hand and closed my fist, smoothing out my jacket and fixing my hair. "And go." And he pushed me to the door. I put the letter in my pocket and turned back.
"Higs?" He was fixing his hair in the mirror when he turned to look at me. He smiled. "I know. Thank me later. Go. Get the girl, just like in the movies." I smiled, slapped the door jam with my hand and took off running down the hall towards the elevator banks. I just hope I get there in time.
The whole way to the airport, I had to talk myself out of turning back around. This was a crazy idea, but now that I was in front of the airport, there was no turning back now. I turned off the engine and jumped out of the truck, taking off towards the door.
"You can't park there!" A valet shouted as I ran past. I looked back and tossed him my keys. "Park it wherever you want. I don't really care. Take whatever cash is in the console as a tip." The valet caught the keys and stared at them. "Right away, Mr. Fallon."
I ran through the doors and up to the monitors in front of me. I searched all four screens until I found her flight number. Great. The flight was boarding. I took one last look at what gate I needed to run to and took off. I immediately ran into a man around my age and was knocked on my ass.
I stood up and dusted myself off. "Sorry!" I yelled as the man turned around while I took off running. "Hey, asshole, watch where you're-- Hey! Man! Jimmy Fallon, I'm a big fan, what's up?!" I stopped running and came back and shook his hand. "Hey, sorry for hitting you! I'm in a big rush though, nice to meet you! Keep watching the show, or start watching if you haven't, or keep doing whatever it is your doing!" I shook his hand again and took off running towards the gate.
I found her gate but there were literally hundreds of people between me and her gate. I couldn't see whether she was standing there or not. I kept running into people as I was running. I made my feeble apologies but didn't stop. I just yelled out as I ran past, hoping they would accept it and not think I was a total jerk. I jumped over people's luggage and a row of chairs. When I landed, I looked up and saw Breckyn handing her ticket to the lady behind the counter. When I saw her face I immediately knew that I made the right decision. I had no regrets except that I didn't get here a little sooner, or that I actually let her attempt to go home without telling her this hours ago. What the hell was I thinking?
"YEAH JIMMY FALLON!" I heard from beside me. I saw Breckyn freeze and slowly turn around. I was breathing heavy and doubled over. I kind of wrenched my ankle jumping over that last row of chairs. I was in pain but that didn't really matter right now. I let out laugh, well, actually it was half a laugh, half a sigh of relief. I made it. I was right in front of her. Now there was only one thing left to do. I took a deep breath and continued running towards her.
****
A cry from Thomas in the back seat kicked me out of my day dream. I felt him squeeze my finger and I looked in the rear view mirror. He was wide awake. He continued crying as I pulled into the driveway.
"Shhhh. Thomas. We're home. We're almost there buddy and then we can get you changed and fed and we will be good to go." I rubbed his little hand with my thumb as he continued to grip my finger. He had a tight squeeze on it. I pulled in front of the stables and turned the engine off. Thomas was still crying but Breckyn was out cold on my lap.
"I need my hand back for just a second, Thomas and then it's all yours again. I promise." I whispered to him as I slipped my finger out. He fussed a little but for the moment he was okay. I brought my hand up to Breckyn's temple and lightly moved her hair out of her face. I laughed to myself as I watched her stir in her sleep. "Hey, Brecks. We're home honey. It's time to get up." I whispered into her ear, kissing the spot right under her ear lobe.
Breckyn let out a happy sleepy groan, one of my favorite sounds in the world. She slowly opened her eyes and lifted her head. She wiped off her mouth and looked down at my shorts. She had left a wet spot. She quickly blotted it with her shirt, which in all reality, was my shirt. "It's okay, babe. I'm used to it by now. I'm pretty sure you've drooled on every piece of clothing I own."
Breckyn smiled and shoved me into the truck door, rubbing her eyes. "You love it and you know it. If I have to deal with your flinching and snoring, then you can deal with a little drool." She unhooked her seatbelt and opened her door.
I quickly took my seat belt off. "Nuh uh. I'm getting your door. Sit. Stay." She slowly brought her leg back in and looked at me through the windshield as I walked around the front of the truck. "You can't talk to me like that, Fallon. I'm not Gary." I laughed as I held out my hand, grabbing hers and helping her down from the truck. "I know you aren't. but you just had a baby and getting in and out of the vehicle isn't going to be easy on you. I'm sure it hurts. Just... let me do this. Let me being the doting father and boyfriend. Please."
Breckyn gave me a soft smile and went to open the door to get Thomas out. I stopped her. "No... I got his carseat. Just... be here with me. Enjoy this moment. We're bringing our son home for the first time and that only happens with your first child once Breck. Believe me. You're gonna want to remember this moment." She wrapped her arm around my waist as I opened the door and she didn't let go as I leaned forward and got Thomas's car seat out of the truck.
As I brought the seat out and held it to my left side, she continued to hug my right side as we walked up to the house. Thomas was fast asleep in the car seat again. Breckyn was watching my every move as we walked up to the house. "Be careful, James. Don't jostle him. He's sleeping like..." she stopped and laughed.
"Like a baby? Is that what you were going to say?" She nodded as I took my arm away from her and reached into my pocket for the keys once we got on the porch. "Yeah, honey, that's what they do. They sleep, they eat, and they poop." I grabbed the keys and put it in the door, unlocking it as I looked into Breckyn's eyes.
"Welcome Home, Thomas." I said as I opened it.
"SURPRISE!!!!" I nearly had a massive coronary as Breckyn nearly climbed me to get away from the sound as at least twenty people jumped up from behind our furniture with party hats and confetti. I saw my parents, Breckyn's parents, Gloria, Jake, Drew and Matt, Justin, Higgins and several others as I scan the room.
Thomas let out a blood curdling scream as the party poppers, party blowers, kazoos and shouts finally died down. Perfect time for a surprise party is when you're bringing home a newborn.
"And cry. They cry too." I said looking back at Breckyn who was still huddled behind me, not knowing what the hell just happened.