CAIT WAS SITTING on the edge of the hotel room bed for what felt like hours. She could still hear the dripping of the shower coming from the room opposite. Skin around her fingers was beginning to peel off from the amount of picking she was doing to them. She had peeled back the skin so far on one of her fingers that it had started to bleed.
She hadn't been this anxious for a while. In fact, the last time she had been this built up was sitting beside her father on his death bed.
Cait didn't want to start a fight or an argument with her other half. She wanted to mend what had been 'broken' even though she had absolutely no clue what it was. She had tried to message him time and time again or she would ask him a question when they were alone. However, all he seemed to do was blow her off or make an excuse to leave.
She could physically hear the pounding sound that her heart made when she heard the bathroom lock twist open.
Before her was her boyfriend, drenched with water droplets over his body, and a towel that sat on his hips. She parted her lips to speak but he beat her to it with the same phrase he had been saying frequently: "I'm going to the gym then out with the guys, my phone will probably be off."
"Just stop," Cait breathed out and slowly shut her eyes to try and gather herself, "stop making excuses, stop running off, I just want it to stop."
Keneti, now fully clothed and running his hand through his hair, stood on the opposite end of the room. His eyes darted to the floor to stop any sort of contact with the girl. He knew he couldn't look at her. He wouldn't be able to handle it.
"It's just going out with Cole and Hart, Cait. No big deal," he swung his kit bag over his shoulder knowing that he should've kept his mouth shut.
Cait stood up from the bed and turned around to look at him, "No, Keneti, a big deal is leaving your girlfriend thinking she's ruined us. What have I done?" Tears brimmed Cait's eyes as she yelled (maybe louder than she should have) at him.
"Oh, so now I can't even go out with friends without worrying about your feelings?" Keneti's bag slid off his shoulder as he snapped back at the petite brunette across from him.
The wind had been knocked out of Cait whenever those words reached her ears. She took a deep breath to stop her quivering voice, "well, I'm sorry that I'm such a fucking burden to you."
"How do you expect me to feel?! I can't go a second without thinking you're going to do something awful!" Keneti, now screaming, was going red all over and a certain vein was straining in his forehead. Cait knew that was a sign that he was holding back tears. She knew things like that.
"I just want to know what I did wrong!? Why won't you fucking tell me, Keneti?!" Cait was now throwing her hands around and pacing the room.
"Nothing! Just be stable for a moment, God!"
Cait didn't move. She didn't even blink. She knew that everything coming out of his mouth was true but she didn't expect it to come from him. Tears had finally escaped her eyes when she opened them to look up at him.
"Get out."
Keneti regretted everything he had just said. He didn't even mean any of it. Just anything to get her off his back but he didn't want it to turn out like this. He hadn't even thought about it.
"Get the fuck out!" Cait screamed.
He snatched his bag and ruffled his hair before slamming the door behind him.
Cait has never felt a pain like it. She never let herself feel a pain like it. She pushed everyone out before they could do any damage. But Keneti was the exception. It's always the damn exception.
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[22.JAN.18]