You sat on your bed on your tiny laptop. You stared back at the screen with frustration, having been gaming and not being so successful. At this point you realized you were dreaming, just reliving a memory.
"Oh no! Dammit!" You shouted at your screen, having lost whatever game you had been playing. As you said it, your father poked his head in the room.
"Honey, why the language? You know you're not supposed to swear." He said. You turned pale once you saw him.
"O-oh gosh, how long have you been home? I didn't know you were back yet.." You said, nervously twirling your (h/l) hair with your finger. You had gotten in trouble for cussing on multiple occasions, to the point where you couldn't hang out with Alice as much. At this time in your life you and Alice had just started hanging out, and you were sure she thought of you as a loser. You knew now as an adult that she never thought of you like that.
"Back or not, do you really think it's right to say that?" He asked calmly, coming over and sitting next to you. You shrugged in response.
"I don't get the big deal against it," You said. "I mean, these words weren't originally bad, someone made them bad I guess. They all have their individual meaning." You said, trying to defend yourself. Your father kissed you on your head.
"Yes, but now they are bad, so I'm afraid that won't excuse you." He said, and left the room. You sighed in exasperation, you couldn't wait to be independent, so you could say what you wanted when you wanted.
The scene shifted to the last time you hung out with Alice, before you knew she was leaving.
"What do you want for Christmas?" She had asked you, it was two weeks before Christmas break.
"I don't care. Maybe (f/f), because how could you wrong with that?" You said smiling. Alice rolled her eyes.
"I want to give you something meaningful, not food. Besides, you should expect more from me. You know I won't get something for you that you can't keep." She said. You smiled, you felt a twist in your stomach that you were never able to identify. Alice was always so kind, you wished you could be like her sometimes.
"You get me whatever you want to get me," You said, putting your hand on her shoulder. "It's the thought that counts, right?"
"Yeah, I guess," She said, then turning around to playfully push you. "But that doesn't help with my choice."
The dream shifted one more time, to a few months later. You were messaging her on Skype.
Hey Alice, I feel like it's been a while since we talked. Wanna catch up on a Skype call?>>
You waited for a response, but nothing came. You frowned at your screen, Alice always had her phone on her, so she usually answered quite quickly.
Al, you there?>>
Well, bye.. call l8er?>>
You turned your device off in defeat and closed your eyes.
☽ ☆ ☾
You woke up from your dream taking deep breaths. You hated having memories as dreams, and they seemed to be getting more frequent. You were still laying in your bed, and you realized now that you had dozed off unexpectedly. You glanced up at your clock, which read that you had been out for about two hours. Your stomach growled and you realized you must have missed dinner. You wondered why your grandparents hadn't woken you up to eat with them.
You got up from your bed and went into the kitchen to get whatever was left over from dinner. Your grandparents were nowhere in sight, which confused you a bit. You opened the fridge to discover they had eaten some plain soup. You shrugged and took it out to heat it up. You walked it to the microwave to notice there was a note taped onto it.
Dear (y/n)
Me and your grandfather have left for a small gathering, sorry for not letting you know. It was an unexpected invite. We left you some soup in the fridge, we'll be back around eleven p.m.
-Grandma
You took the letter down and glanced again at the clock, it was about nine p.m. so they would be back in about another two hours. You warmed your soup up and brought it to the table, blowing on it to cool it down. You tried to remember what you had been doing before you fell asleep, and remembered messaging Sean. You quickly pulled out your phone to check if he had messaged you back, and you saw a notification.
Okay, time to find out if I was completely wrong and screwed everything up, or if I actually am onto something. You thought as you tapped the notification. It was in fact a message back from Sean.
Reply from JackSepticEye
(y/n), I don't know how you acquired that info, but I don't want to talk about it so spare me about how you knew. Still recovering.
You felt your heart drop to your stomach, you felt horrible that Sean was going through this, but even worse for actually knowing what was happening when you probably shouldn't have. You wanted to comfort him, but that was one thing you sucked at. Besides, it would be easier to comfort him if you were with him in person. You felt the extreme desire to meet him face to face just to be with him for this, but you knew he probably didn't want you there considering he wasn't planning on telling you anyways.
Reply from (u/n)
Sorry, but if you feel like talking just.. well you can message me.
You sat back and cringed at your message. You hoped you were not as nosy as it seemed to you.
Reply from JackSepticEye
I'd rather talk about these things in person. But I'm in no condition to Skype right now, and I barely know you, (y/n). It just bothers me a bit that you know this and my best friends don't.
You understood that a bit, but you felt like you wanted to help him further, was that selfish of you?
Reply from (u/n)
I'm not going to pretend that I understand what you're going through, but I don't think keeping it in would really help.
You hoped you didn't sound too pushy. You honestly hoped you didn't sound like a lot of things, all you wanted in that moment was to comfort Sean like Alice could comfort you.
Reply from JackSepticEye
Thanks for your consideration and everything, but honestly if you call I might be a mess. It's a sensitive topic right now.
You didn't mean to sound forceful or make him want to call you, so you wanted to clear that up.
Reply from (u/n)
You don't have to if you don't want to. I was just suggesting.
You started to finish the rest of your soup as you waited for a reply from Sean.
Reply from JackSepticEye
Maybe I need to get it off my chest. Are you available for another Skype call then?
You smiled at your screen. Maybe you weren't the best at comforting, but you were sure going to try. Now that you thought of it, it seemed weird. You, a fan, comforting your idol.
Reply from (u/n)
I'm available, send the call when you're ready.
You quickly ran into your room so you could be more comfortable while talking with Sean. Your stomach twisted with that unfamiliar feeling again as you opened up Skype on your laptop. Just in time too, Sean had already sent the call. You quickly answered it to see Sean's familiar face on your screen.
"Hey Sean.." You said carefully.
"Hey (y/n)." he said, his voice was a little scratchy and thick. He cleared his throat. You tapped your bed nervously.
"I-I'm really sorry. Tell me if there is any way to help.." You said, going straight to offering help.
"I'm not sure 'bout that, but, uh." He cleared his throat again "Maybe I should get it all off my chest. Anyways, you already know what generally happened.. uh.." He paused for a bit. You sat there silently, waiting for him to continue. "Well, I was going to plan a recording introducing Signe officially on Youtube, because I never really had her featured in a video before. It was gonna be some sorta new years celebration. Anyways, I was recording and everything was going fine, and it was our count down at this point. So we counted down, and I was gonna do that thing where you kiss someone on new years. So I went to, and she kinda blocked me I guess. A-and.." He stopped for a bit before taking in a shaky sigh. "And then she told me something along the lines of 'Sean, I don't think this is working out for me' or some bullshit like that. I still don't know exactly why.." He said. You could tell he was holding in a lot of emotions right then.
"Signe did that..? While you were recording?" You asked softly. You could never understand why anyone could do that. Signe literally had the best boyfriend in history, and she dumped him so quickly, and so easily. She left an amazing person hurting. Sean nodded and wiped his eyes. You felt your face heat up, you hadn't intended for him to cry.
"Sean, I'm sorry for making you do this, I-"
"No, I-I had to talk to, to someone and I.." He started before taking another shaky breath.
"Thank you (y/n). I don't understand why I told you this, but be good and not share it on social media or with your friends.."
"What friends?" You murmured quietly. You both sat in silence. You felt like you needed to say something, but you didn't know what was right to say. "Sean.. if you need my help, for anything..just ask. I'll, uh, help." You ended awkwardly.
"Thanks.." He mumbled. "I think I'm, um, gonna end the call now.." He said. His face was red from crying a bit. You nodded as he ended it. You knew what you wanted to do now. You started a plan in your head.
"First, I need to look up," You mumbled quietly, searching on Google. "If Sean is going to Pax South."