The kiss lingers on my lips for what feels like forever. Connor is never like that – gentle, caring, and loving. I have never blamed him for any of it. If you'd meet his parents, you'd see where he gets it from.
But that...
The lights make me dizzy, or maybe it was the kiss, I can't tell.
I fight my way through the crowd once again in order to get away. I finally find a seat at the top of the wooden staircase that is luckily abandoned for the time being. I hear a few voices from behind me in the upstairs, but I ignore them.
Now that my boyfriend is MIA, I can think about what I'm going to do when I come face-to-face with the person I didn't think I'd have to see again.
He's been at Military school for the past two years. Two years of no trouble and no tricks. Also two years of wondering what was going through his mind.
Having walked in on him kissing another girl while the two of us were dating, you can imagine how the last two years of my life have been. Always wondering why, or what did I do? I wasn't able to ask those questions because the very next day he was sent off to military school, his parents moved closer the school to keep an eye on him as well. I guess the whole family is back.
I can't remember now what I had said when I caught him, but I know they were awful. The girl ran and hid in the corner, probably waiting for some WWE action between Will and me.
I remember feeling bad for what I had said and the way he looked at me as I said them. He never tried to stop me as I spat ugly things. I never figured why. I also never found out who the girl was. I hope I never do.
The next day I was told that there had been a boat set on fire by the dock Will and I used to go to all the time. Apparently it was his fault – it was classified as an accident until they found a piece of Will's clothing. After all the shenanigans Will had pulled before, the local cops didn't hesitate to do anything about it.
So, I haven't seen him since.
I don't want to be at this party anymore. I wanted to find Connor, but that has proved to be impossible, though I haven't tried too hard. He shouldn't have disappeared like that.
I stand and start to walk down the stairs until I notice the plastic golden crown setting on top of his head. I run down the rest of the steps and grab his hand after I find it. I jerk him out of the crowd with a groan escaping my lips.
Connor is the fullback on the football team and a star javelin thrower on the track team at Beverly High School. His muscles don't look gigantic, but they feel that way.
My stature of five-foot-five is nothing compared to his six-foot-two. He staggers into me, almost knocking both of us onto the floor. Luckily a wall stopped us.
"Connor," I say, hoping he isn't completely out of it already.
He looks at me and smiles. "I thought you were mad at me." Beads of sweat collect on his forehead and I can barely smell the mint left in his breath.
He props a hand against the wall so he's hovering over me.
"I'm over it," I whisper in attempt not to breathe in anymore of his intoxicated air than necessary. "Are you drunk?"
"No babe," he protests, hanging his head low. He lifts it back up with a smile. "Okay, maybe a little."
"Connor..."
There is no possible way he could have kissed me the way he did while drunk. He probably can't even navigate through these people. I must have been dreaming when he kissed me. I wanted it so bad that I imagined it right up.
"I'm leaving," I tell him. I lean forward and give him a soft kiss, but it's nothing compared to earlier.
Connor sticks his bottom lip out like a child. "Why, Jessa?"
"I'm just not into this party anymore..."
"Why are you so grouchy? Is it that time of the month?" He reaches for my wrist and his hand tightens around it as he tries to restrain me. I jerk it free and push him away.
"Look, don't drive home like that. I can give you a ride now if you want," I state calmly.
"No," he says with a growl, giving me an angry look and shoving my shoulder so I hit the wall behind me. I ignore it because I'm used to our playful pushing. "I'll take care of myself fine."
I don't say anything as he lets go of me and walks away.
Hannah and Tyler are standing next to the door when I find them. They are chatting up a storm with a girl from school. She's a year younger than me so I don't really remember her name.
"Hannah." I tap her shoulder. "Are you guys ready?"
Tyler looks at me and his smile falters. "What's wrong?"
"I just want to go home is all. Not feeling the party." How many times am I going to have to say that?
He shrugs his shoulders and waits for Hannah to say her goodbyes to the girl. Hannah and I follow him into the darkness to try to find my car.
"What happened?" Hannah asks me as she links her arm through mine.
"Nothing, really," I try to say truthfully. Besides my boyfriend being his normal arrogant self and the surprise visit of Will? Nothing at all.
Hannah purses her lips and doesn't pry though she sees right through me as usual.
All three of us pile into my small car with lots to talk about. Well, the two of them do. I decide to just listen. Hannah actually sounds like she's enjoyed herself for once and I feel slightly accomplished.
I smile to myself. "So, are you happy that you put down that book to come to this? And look! It ended well!" My sarcasm was excruciating even to me.
"Actually," Hannah says. "I am. But my book is really good, too."
Tyler and I chuckle at her response. Once a bookworm, always a bookworm.
That's our Hannah.
Once we reach the Carter household, Hannah and Tyler climb out of the car. They both walk to my window to say goodbye.
"Text me when you get home," Hannah orders as usual, giving me her stern "mom" look. I chuckle and nod my head.
"Will do, Grandma," I tell her jokingly. Grandma is the nickname I gave Hannah a few years back because of her love for old things and her dedication to old values and morals. But I can't say if she likes it or not.
She grimaces as she walks away and I laugh to myself, giving her a cheesy grin.
The light are all off when I pull into my driveway. There's no doubt my mother would kill if she caught me sneaking in at eleven o'clock at night on a school night.
I tiptoe upstairs to my bedroom after sneaking in through the front door. After I click my bedroom door shut behind me, I can breathe. I had a successful return home without being caught by Mom or Dad – or my obnoxious sisters.
Stripping out of my Bonnie clothes, I toss them on the floor and grab an old cheerleading shirt that's a few years old and a pair of shorts. My cheerleading bag is setting beside my bed, staring up at me like it knows.
It knows I hate it. It's the only one that knows. I don't have school spirit like my sisters, the past two head cheerleaders at Beverly High. I am supposed to follow in their footsteps, according to my mother. And then I have to choose a successful major for college just like my sisters.
The thing is; I'm not my sisters.
Although Mom gives me crap about not being more perfect like Sydney and Victoria, I can't help but feel like I need to make her proud. If being a head cheerleader and getting straight A's is how I'm going to make her proud, so be it.
She loves Syd and Tori because of their accomplishments, so what will I be if I don't have any?
Feeling exhausted mentally and physically from my hardcore dancing, I fall into bed and pile a ton of blankets on top of myself. The Washington weather is always permitting extra blankets.
I hold my phone in front of my face as I scroll through Twitter, my nighttime ritual. Many of the tweets on my news feed are about the party with plenty of pictures of costumes and good friends bringing in the new school year.
I am just about turn my phone off and go to sleep when I scroll passed an odd tweet.
James_Duncan: The man himself has returned, ladies and gents!
Attached to the tweet is a picture of familiar boy with dark disheveled hair and bright brown eyes. The kind of bright that is filled with life. A smile that looks like it was caused by pure joy is stretched across his face. He's also dressed as Prince Charming. His arm is hanging around James' shoulders.
I'm not sure who it is until I see who is tagged in the tweet.
Looks the like rumors are true.
Will Dawson is back.
________
I was gonna wait until Sunday to post this, but I got too excited. Not real sure when I'll post again but it will be within the next week!
I think we all knew he would be, hehe.
The picture is of Daniel Sharman as Connor! The song is Golden Days by Panic! At the Disco.