"Before this moment, the only experience I had of dealing with the death of a loved one was my mother. As I mentioned before, I don't remember what it was like to lose my mother. I hadn't understood what death was back then, thus keeping me from feeling any overwhelming emotions.
This was different.
I was a grown man now that completely understood death. I had seen death plague and torture Translyvania for the last year. I had helped many of the servants mourn as they experienced death in their own lives. I had attended many funerals and had witnessed the families weeping in their loss. There was no hiding from the truth any longer.
My fingers fell away from Rosetta's as I attempted to take in what had just been said to me. My eyes were focused on the servant's face but my mind was far from this moment. I could see the man's lips moving, yet no words were audible to me. The world was growing blurry and I wasn't sure if it was because I was bound to collapse in shock or if the tears were already building in my eyes. This wasn't how it was supposed to be.
Father was supposed to be alive. He was supposed to be awaiting Rosetta and I with open arms and a wide smile. He was supposed to be able to meet my wife, to meet the woman that had changed everything in seconds. I was supposed to tell him about King Henry and the cruel ways of Invea. Our futures flickered before my eyes and I found more things to think about. Father was supposed to be around when Rosetta and I eventually had our children. He was supposed to be a grandfather. I wasn't done learning from him yet. I wasn't ready to be without him.
'You lie,' I whispered to the servant, unable to comprehend what had been said. I had seen my father the day before. He hadn't been well, but he hadn't been on death's door. I had seen many people right before they passed and there were many signs. My father hadn't shown any. A stinging grew in my shaking chest as a theory came upon me. Had my father always been this close to death, but had been waiting until he was sure I wasn't alone anymore to pass on?
I knew the servant wouldn't lie about something so serious and my father wasn't the kind to joke around about death. Given the amount of pain I felt, I knew it wasn't a dream. This was real.
The servant's eyes didn't pull away from mine, instead leaking a single tear down his cheek. 'I'm sorry, Vladimir.' He said quietly, his voice betraying his otherwise calm demeanor. It trembled and cracked as much as my own wanted to.
I began to shake my head, trying to cling to the hope that it was all made up. Forgetting Rosetta and Franklin were directly beside me, along with the other servants, I began to run through the familiar halls and stairways to his room. I wanted to see it for myself.
As I ran, I tried to picture my father lying peacefully in his bed. I pictured him propped up, hands folded across his waist as he smiled at me. I pictured him teasing me for crying over him, saying something among the lines of he could never pass without saying goodbye to me first.
The memories circled my head and I could hear his voice clearly. It was as though he was directly behind me, calling to me, but I knew it to be fake. The little hope I had that it was some cruel joke shrunk with every mourning servant I passed on my way to father's room.
In the back of my mind, I could see his smile. I could hear his laugh echoing around me, picturing how his eyes would light up when he was proud or joyful. I hadn't seen that face in months, given how I had disobeyed him when it came to finding a wife. I hadn't been ready. While it guilted me as it robbed me of recalling when the last time he had been proud of me, I knew it had been the right thing.
I stumbled towards his door as I grew closer, trying to ignore the amount of servants that were gathered directly outside as if they had been expecting me. They stepped aside, allowing me to close in at the door. With a shaking hand, I grabbed the handle. I briefly locked eyes on a woman beside me.
'It's okay, Vladimir,' she whispered. While she didn't smile and had tears slowly rolling down her cheeks, I felt comforted. 'You can do this.'
I wasn't sure if I believed her words, but I continued despite my uncertainty. I turned the knob and carefully pushed it forward. I kept my eyes shut as the room revealed itself to me. When the courage finally came to me, I carefully opened my eyes and felt my knees collapse beneath me. I let go of the door as I fell to the floor, gaze fully locked on the empty bed of my father. The sheets were neat and all the supplies the doctors had brought in were long gone. His scent lingered in the air, it being the only reminder that someone had once lived inside this room.
My head dropped into my hands as I bent down until my forehead touched the flooring. I didn't try and stop the tears like I had earlier. It felt hot against my face as each one fell out of my eyes, each being a reminder that father was gone from this world. I'm sure in that moment I was screaming out for him while I wept. I had never before hurt like that.
Father was dead. He was gone from this world for the rest of eternity. Ever since father had gotten sick, I had dreaded this moment. I had dreaded feeling alone without any guidance. I didn't feel ready. Father had often told me that I would never feel ready, that I would have to face it head on and figure it out as I went, but I never believed him. I always assured him that we wouldn't have to worry about it.
How wrong I was.
My entire world began falling apart in my father's bedroom doorway, walls I had spent long putting up collapsing all around me. There were so many questions I still had to ask him, so many things I had wanted to do with him. Loneliness began creeping into my broken heart.
Mother had left me. Father had left me. Who else would leave me?
Just when I thought all the servants had left and I was all alone, the light sound of footsteps echoed through the hallway. A small hand pressed into my back and someone knelt beside me.
I barely had enough energy to look beside me, but I'm glad I did. My eyes began to widen as I saw her, remembering that I still had someone. I wasn't alone like I had thought.
Rosetta.
How, in the midst of my mourning, had I forgotten that I had Rosetta now? How had I forgotten that I had gotten married, and now I had a wife?
Mother had left me and father had left me, but I wasn't alone. This wasn't the end.
'Vladimir,' Her voice caressed me, eyes wide with concern and grief. Rosetta's free hand reached out and held the side of my face, her thumb wiping away several stray cheeks off my cheek.
I needed her. I had long thought father was insane for pressuring me to find a wife, but at that moment I understood. It all made sense.
I fully turned myself towards her, pushing my face into a lower part of her neck as my arms wrapped around her and I began to melt into her embrace. While we weren't extremely close yet, and I wasn't sure how she would handle it, I felt comfort.
To my relief, her arms secured themselves around my neck and one of her hands buried itself within my hair, gingerly playing with several strands. Rosetta carefully placed her lips against the side of my head, saying nothing as my weeping intensified.
It felt strange so quickly exposing this emotional side of me to a woman I had just met, but that was the furthest thing from our minds.
The next few hours passed by at a strange speed. I wasn't aware if I was coming or going. My entire body felt numb. I helped the servants with what I could as a funeral was prepared. He was to be laid next to my mother and my unborn sibling. Several servants went down to the village and alerted the townspeople of my father's passing and all were invited to attend his funeral.
I wasn't surprised to see how many people came to my father's service. The graveyard was filled with people that had loved my father. I couldn't see a dry eye among the crowd, not even from Rosetta who hadn't known my father.
She stood beside me, her hand intertwined in mine as she supported me. Rosetta had said very little since earlier, but part of me felt thankful. While I still wanted to learn all I could about her, my mind wasn't in the best state for learning. Anything she'd tell me would simply remind me of another thing my father wouldn't get to learn about her.
The priest that officiated the funeral read several passages from his Bible as he attempted to bring comfort to all of us, but it failed. I knew he was trying and I respected that, but the pain was too great. Few people stood to speak after the priest.
I was last.
I was hesitant to pull my hand away from Rosetta, knowing that she was the only person keeping me grounded, but I needed to be brave for my people; for our people. My heart was heavy as I brought myself closer to the grave, not wanting to bring myself to look into the hole where his casket lay still. 'My father,' I began, taking a deep breath, 'was a good man.' It was hard trying to put all of my feelings into words on the spot. I had briefly thought of all that I wanted to say earlier, but all those sentences had faded away once I felt everyone's eyes upon me.
I focused on what would be my father's headstone, fighting the tears that threatened to keep falling like they had all day. 'It seems that in this world, those who don't deserve to live get to be in their hundreds. The kindest of them all and the ones who bless this world with their presence barely make it into their elderly years. I just... I wish I could have been there for him in his last moments.' I sighed, using my sleeve to wipe at my eyes but it did nothing to stop the tears. 'I know that the world is weeping with my father's passing. Grief isn't the word to describe what we all are feeling. I know this pain will never pass, but it will grow easier as we remember that my father is no longer suffering and that he continues to watch over us in all of our daily lives.'
As I found the strength to look into the crowd of villagers and servants, all who had been touched by my father in some way, I continued. 'When you all go home, I beg of you. Hug your fathers and your mothers, your sons and your daughters. Tell them that you love them. Make sure they know. Please.' My strength began to fade as I struggled to remember what I had said to father the last time I had seen him. I knew that I hadn't been in the greatest of moods. I dropped my gaze, beginning to be consumed by my grief once more.
I wasn't sure how, but Rosetta seemed to notice the change. She moved away from the crowd and came to my side. She gingerly wrapped an arm around my waist, tilting her head onto my chest.
Silence filled the air as the service came to a close after I had spoken. People came up to the grave, some saying small prayers and dropping flowers into the hole, while others said their goodbyes. As the minutes passed on, the graveyard began to clear out as everyone returned to their homes.
It wasn't long before it was only Rosetta and I left, a few guards lingering nearby to ensure we returned to the mansion safely. It was then that I finally found the strength to speak again as we watched the grave be filled with dirt, my father disappearing beneath it. 'I... I'm sorry, Rosetta. You never got to meet him.' I swallowed, trying not to wince with each shovel that dropped dirt down. 'He was such a wonderful person. You would have loved him.' I shook my head, pulling away from her enough to look down into the grave. I watched as all the flowers people had thrown down began to disappear with the casket.
Rosetta followed, placing her hand on the side of my cheek. She caressed my cheek, pulling my eyes back to me. Somehow, she found the strength to smile. 'Oh Vladimir, I have yet to meet him, but I plan to.'
Her words confused me and caused my eyes to widen as I briefly wondered if she planned on leaving me too. I placed my hand over her wrist, squeezing lightly to silently pass the message that I didn't want her to go anywhere. 'I don't understand. He's dead. How will you meet him?' My fear lingered that she was going to leave. I wasn't sure if my silent message had been received. 'Wait... You don't get to leave me too.' It was one of the few commands I'd ever give her, though I wasn't sure I'd follow through with it if she truly wanted to walk away.
Rosetta's smile remained. 'I don't plan on it. Here.' She let her hand drop down to mine. She pulled me closer to his grave, kneeling beside the open hole and gingerly pulled my hand down with her.
'Rosetta? What are you doing?' I asked, using my sleeve to wipe at my face again as we knelt together. I focused my eyes on the grave, trying to not think about how my father was beneath all those flowers and dirt.
The darkened clouds began to sprinkle rain down upon us, but neither of us moved. The smell of fresh rain was comforting and I was thankful that it mixed with my tears, unable to allow those to see what was real and what was rain. It provided me some shelter.
'Hello, Alistair Dracula. It's a pleasure to finally meet you.' Rosetta leaned her head forward, looking down into the grave. She even made a small wave with one of her hands.
I found myself beginning to gawk at my new bride.
'I've heard so many wonderful things about you, most from your son, but also from all of your people. Mr. Dracula, you have raised such a wonderful young man. I've only known him for almost two days now, but he has already saved me. My father isn't nearly as kind as I've heard you are. He was cruel and your Vladimir protected me from him. He kept him away from me for the rest of the evening, through the night, and even in the morning.' It was then she paused.
My eyes were no longer upon my father's grave, but instead on her. I felt amazed how a person could do such a thing; how she could do this. My heart slowly began to mend itself.
'The wedding was beautiful. I wish you could have come too.' Rosetta smiled a little more. 'Perhaps you were there. I hope you were.' She gently moved some of her hair away from her eyes as the rain fell heavier. 'Your people said you were a great leader to them. I have no doubts that Vladimir will make you proud. I know this was an arranged marriage, one that was decided between you and my father. I feel in my heart now that it was more your doing than my father's and I am beyond grateful. You son... I know he is going to be the light of my eyes and the entirety of my heart one day. I am honored to be able to have him as my husband, the man I will share the rest of my life with.' She bowed her head as she reached out, grabbing some of the loose dirt in her hands. Rosetta began to sprinkle it down into the grave. 'It was nice to meet you, Mr. Dracula. I look forward to speaking with you again. I hope you are having a wonderful time with the angels. Say hello to my mother for me, would you? Thank you.'
When there was no more dirt left in her hands, Rosetta moved her gaze to mine and smiled. 'You're right, Vladimir. Your father is a wonderful man.'
For the first time in hours, I smiled. I smiled because I wondered just how father had found my Rosetta. I smiled because she was making me understand that it was all going to be okay. It also might have had something to do with how the rain drops slowly moved across her face and made her appear as though she was made of porcelain. Her cheeks had become rosy as the heat rushed to her face as the temperature around us dropped.
My hand found hers again, intertwining our fingers once more. 'Thank you,' I whispered, watching as she began to stand.
'We should head home,' Rosetta held her free hand out, smiling at each drop that fell into her hand. 'We can come back when the rain stops.' As always, her voice was gentle and calming. It allowed me to feel at peace.
Though I would have preferred to stay outside with father, I knew she spoke the truth. If we stayed out here much longer, we'd grow ill with colds. That wasn't an ideal way of spending our first few days of marriage. I had to think of her first now.
I gave her a nod and found the strength within my legs to force myself to stand, stumbling at first. We followed after the guards as we headed back to the mansion in a soothing silence.
I vowed to let that be the only funeral I went to of someone I cared for, to be the only death I lived through when it came to my family.
But, we can't all have what we want."