Two days passed and we finally made our way to the end of the field and to the village.
"Why couldn't we just ride Black Bolt?"
"Well he doesn't really like to be ridden"
"Then why do you even have a horse!"
A few minutes of bickering later and we arrived in the little village.
"Village" was being generous for the small area was just bigger than a few wooden houses. It seemed like a rather nice town with its little houses and shops. A rather new and untouched place, a perfect area to settle down at.
There was only one problem....No one lived there.
"Hello is anyone here!!!" Jaime yelled out.
"Is it really just an abandoned town?"
Just then I heard a can fall from a barrel.
"What was that!!!" Jaime yelped, hiding behind Black Bolt.
"It's fine it was probably just the wind."
"That's what they all say.....before they die!!!!"
"Right..."
something caught my eye when I peered through a window.
"Those voices, you hear em?" The fairy whispered to me.
I gave a nod and headed over to Jaime.
"Stay on guard, we aren't alone."
Both Jaime and I grabbed our swords and got back to back. We stood for a minute before a door opened and out popped a head.
"Um....hello?"
It just stared at us as if examining something. The figure slowly slithered out of the house and made its way to us. The light showed an old man, his wrinkles and white hair giving away his age. he wore dark blue robes that looked like some sort of church attire. He got closer then I would have liked and I felt his breath on my neck.
"I claim that thou are not witches!!!" He shouted.
With an eruption of cheers, dozens of villagers in pilgrim like clothing came out rejoicing.
"Thank god! We were ready to burn you at the steak," one of the villagers laughed.
"That's not something you just say!" I shouted.
"What do you mean by witch?" Jaime asked.
"Well I think that's obvious, we're talking about a devil worshiper," the man chuckled.
"Oh, I see...."
"So what brings you to our little town?"
"Well we're just kind of going with the flow and need a place to sleep, if you have an inn around here I would like to stay there, I can pay," I asked, showing off my coin pouch.
"No need we haven't had a visitor in years it's on the house, take whatever room you want."
"Oh no, I couldn't possibly-"
"Well take it!" Jaime exclaimed.
"Excellent, we shall have a party in your honor," the man cheered to everyone's delight.
"No that's really not necessary," I said but Jaime butted in yet again, "Let's get things going!"
These people wanted a party a little too much, they were practically clawing at each other.
"Just give us some time to freshen up, okay?"
"Aren't knights suppose to be all modest and humble?" I thought as we walked to the inn.
"We really shouldn't mess with these people like this..."
"It's fine if they want a party let them have a party!"
"You just want to drink...." I clarified.
The room was rather charming with two nice beds, a few drawers and a place to shower and even a window view. I wouldn't call it a hotel suite but it was much more than my stuffy old hut.
"I call dibs on the bath!" Jaime screamed, stripping and jumping in.
"Well, I guess that's fine...." I sighed, unpacking the rest of my stuff.
"Hey Kaldos....over here" a voice called. I turned to see the fairy calling me.
"oh yeah, you're still following me."
"How rude!!!"
"Hey, that reminds me, I never got your name."
"Oh your right, my name is Lily Devee."
"Devee?"
"It's royalty for your information."
"Oh, right you haven't met Jaime, Hey Jai-!" She hit me in the mouth.
"Shhh shhh don't tell him I'm here!!!" She whispered.
"Huh? Why?"
"I'm here to fulfill Your wishes and no one else's"
"Sheesh, alright then."
"So did you just want to pop in? You hungry or something?"
"No this is very serious! You have to get out of this town now!" She yelled with her tiny little lungs.
"Huh? Why?"
"These people are crazy! If you don't leave now you'll be killed!!!"
"What? You high or something?"
"No, I'm seri-"
"Hey Kaldos who are you talking to?"
By the time Jaime got out Kaldos was alone in the room again, "oh no one, just thinking out loud."
"You're up then, hurry and take a shower! We have a feast to get to!"
After taking a quick shower I got dressed and Jaime and I walked out to the town hall where all the villagers were setting up a huge table with tons of different foods.
"Welcome visitors, dig in!" The man announced.
"With pleasure!" Jaime teared up as he dove into the food and started stuffing his face.
I really was starting to let what Lily said get to me everything was starting to look suspicious
"But I can't let all this food go to waste..."
"What's wrong? Do you not like our cooking?" The man asked.
"N-no its just that..."
"Come now, Ms. Miller worked really hard on this turkey, her gravy is to die for," he said passing me a plate of food that looked delicious.
"Really didn't need to hear that metaphor right now!" I thought to myself as the turkeys snuck its way onto my plate. It was calling to me, just like at Gap Valley.
I looked to Jaime who seemed to have already finished a turkey all on his own. I finally caved in and took a bite. After that I began digging in and eating just as much as Jaime.
"Man I don't think I can eat anymore," Jaime groaned.
"Make sure to leave room for dessert," the man nudged Jaime, passing us both a small square looking cake with a strawberry on top, "Enjoy...."
"Looks great!"
Right before Jaime could put the succulent spongy goodness in his mouth I stood up and slapped it to the ground.
"What are you doing Kaldos?!" Jaime yelled.
"What's a matter young one, do you not like cake?"
"No, I really love cake...like, a lot."
"Then why don't you try it?" The man pushed.
"Because I want you to try some," I interjected.
"Oh, but we made it just for you."
I saw his hands tightening up, I was getting to him.
"I insist you try it, I'm just too full to eat another bite."
"But I'm not..." Jaime whispered.
"Enough of this it's obvious you know what we're doing!!!" The man snapped, dropping the cake.
"Whatever are your talking about sir?" I innocently played off.
"You and your friend are witches!!!" He proclaimed.
"A witch?" Jaime gasped, stuffing his face still.
"Stop eating the food!!!"
"I figured you were up to something the way you pushed me to eat and then when you served us dessert I noticed no one else was eating, meaning you did something to the cake am I right?!?!" I claimed.
"This only proves you're a witch more, the only way you would have known is by magic!" He yelled.
"As if! it just took some common knowledge and deduction skills to figure this out, maybe a little bit of Pheonix Wright playing but that was it!"
"Wait! So I can't eat the cake?" Jaime asked.
"The cake was poisoned so if you were a Witch you would have cured yourself before you die and then we would have burned you and if we were mistaken you would have died from the poison" the man explained.
"Your logic is totally unfair!"
"Poisoned? Like Lemon flavor? I hate Lemon." Jaime spat.
"Enough of this! Villagers ready your bows!!!!"
All the villagers aimed their bows at Jaime and me.
"Don't make any sudden moves" I whispered to Jaime.
"Don't worry I can handle this" Jaime smirked.
"Wait Jaime!" I cried.
"Fear not villagers for we are not witches, but two men on a journey to find ourselves. Haven't you ever wanted to leave this small town and explore the world? The world is an amazing place and me and my friend will travel it all no matter what and will let nothing stand in our way! Would I witch do that!?"
The villagers started to put there bows down and listen to Jaime.
"Are they actually believing him?"
"So please let us go and let us continue our journey to not only save this world but find ourselves!"
Everyone grew silent for a few minutes.
"He uses word speak magic! FIRE FIRE FIRE!!!!!" A man yelled.
All the villagers aimed again and began firing at Jaime.
Jaime began dodging all the arrows he could and began running towards me.
"No, stay away! You're bringing the arrows!!!" I yelled as I began running.
"Hurry, call Black Bolt! Call Black bolt!"
Jaime grabbed a small whistle from his pocket and blew on it as hard as he could. It made no noise but he said he was on his way.
"Enough of this! Bring out the flame arrows!!!" The man yelled as all the villagers drenched their arrows in oil.
"No! Keep the flame arrows in! Keep them in!" Jaime yelled.
After a good ten minutes or so we both managed to get cornered.
"Damn things are about to get messy!" I thought to myself having my sword ready.
Just then Black Bolt charged down the road and starting ramming the villagers.
"Yeah get um Black Bo-!" Black Bolt rammed Jaime as well as the villagers.
"Good boy..." Jaime groaned on the floor.
"Damn that horse can really deal some damage" I gapped as I saw him pummeling villager after villager.
The man had hid in a near by house and now aimed an arrow at my back.
"You won't live through this demon spawn!!!" He yelled firing an arrow.
"Look out Kaldos!" Lily cried.
I turned around and saw Jaime taking the arrow for me.
"Jaime!?!?!" I gasped.
"Don't worry about me...I'm...fine just don't forget our dreams."
"Shut up Jaime it only pierced your armor" I said hitting him.
"huh? Oh that it did! You have saved me yet again!"
"No, I really didn't......you didn't even have to jump in the way I was going to block with my sword."
"Well then onward! Let's show these villagers who they're messing with!!!" Jaime roared, running out into the mob only to get shot five more times.
I let out a sigh, "guess I'll handle this."
Black Bolt was too fast to get hit by the arrows but he was getting tired fast and the villagers seemed to not be giving up.
"Hey, Lily isn't there something you can do?" I asked.
"Only if you wish for it" she hummed.
"Damn you!" I cursed, tapping her with my hilt.
"Hey not my fault you can't fight!"
"Shut up!"
We began a trash talk competition as a few villagers overheard us.
"Fire!!!"
I quickly blocked the first few arrows but I was over powered when three hit at once. I quickly scurried away and hid behind a house.
"Damn! I can't fight close combat here" I ground my teeth.
"If only you had a way to fight back, maybe if you had some kind of mystical goddess that could oh I don't know...grant wishes?"
"Fine just let me think for a minute."
Just then a fire arrow hit just a few feet away from my foot.
"Better hurry," Lily whistled.
"Okay, I got it! I wish to have magic!"
"On it!" She nodded, sprinkling some dust on me.
The villagers saw a quick flash of light and froze in place, bows at the ready. I slowly walked out, "guess you were right I really am I witch!" I laughed as I formed a flame in my hand.
"Take this!" I cried about to throw the flame but it exploded in my hands.
"Get him!!" They yelled.
I ran back into my little hiding place, "What the hell was that! Why did it explode!"
"Sorry but you wished to have magic not be good at it," she pointed out.
"What type of stupid wishes do you give you worthless fairy!!!" I raged, slashing at her.
"Hey watch it you still have another wish" she reminded me.
"You better hopes this works," I mumbled, thinking of electricity. My hand began to buzz and out popped a blot of lighting.
"Here goes nothing!" I screamed, running out and firing it at the ground, knocking all the villagers down.
I quickly ran away in search of Black Bolt.
"Okay we have to find Black Bolt and get Jaime and leave, these people really are crazy."
"Oh if only someone had warned you."
"I will cut you!" I yelled.
As we ran I was stopped by the man from before.
"You damn witch you have ruined everything...Now die!!!!" He said firing at me.
"I'm...not a witch!" I yelled as my sword caught on fire and I slashed right through the arrow and a blast of flames hit the man, burning him alive.
I stood shocked for a minute before Lily snapped me out of it.
"Come on witch, I think I see Black Bolt!" she teased.
It didn't take long before we found Black Blot and soon after we grabbed Jaime's lifeless corpse and ran out of there as fast as we could.
Jaime slowly began waking up, "What happened?"
I thought for a second of what to tell him, "You went in and fought like a true soldier, you must have vanquished at least fifty villagers."
"What else could you expect from the Mighty Chicken Slayer!" he roared.
"Please stop calling yourself that, it's not intimating."
"What about all our stuff?" Jaime asked.
"Don't worry I took it out of the inn and put it outside of the village before this all happened just in case."
"I see, you made the right choice," Jaime said as he looked at the now burning town that caught on fire from all the arrows.
"Welp let's not do that again."
He quickly got on Black Bolt, "Now.....let us ride!!!" He yelled as Black Bolt bucked him off and began stomping on him.
"Ahhh! Okay Black Bolt I give! I give!"
This was just the beginning of the many misadventures that made me get up every morning and say the same thing, "Why me?"