Sick of all these people talking
Sick of all the noise
Tired of all these cameras flashing
Sick of being poised
Now, my neck is open wide
Begging for a fist around it
Already choking on my pride
So there's no use crying about it.
- Halsey.
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Camila's P.O.V.
During these past couple of days, Ally and I have gotten along pretty well, even discovered we have a few or more things in common, which is honestly a relief because truth be told, it would be a nightmare having to get through an entire year with an insufferable roommate, so thank God for that. However, though, I've noticed that I've been getting strange attention from students around here these past couple of days. Like, I would be walking down a hall after class or something and everyone in the same hall would all just legit stop their conversations and just stare at me. To put it simply, it's not exactly the best feeling in the world. Usually when that happens, though, I make sure to keep my head down and try to speed up my steps as much as I can to get out of there as soon as possible. I hate drawing any type of attention to myself for whatever reason; just the feeling of having other people peel my down with their eyes is enough to give me goosebumps.
In other news, I spoke to my dad yesterday about my apparent placement in a class that people literally wait in line for and asked him if he pulled any strings, and he tried to dodge the subject at first, saying he had nothing to do with it and that he had no clue what I was talking about, but I wasn't dumb enough to believe any of his bullshit and got it out of him eventually. Apparently, along with filling the guardian information form the day he visited the school to complete my admission process, he also signed a shareholder's contract - just like he does with every other company or institution he takes an interest in - and now he holds a whole 2% of MIMA's stakes, and also apparently sponsors to the school's extracurriculars. And so the owner decided to place me in Mrs. Stewart's homeroom in return for my father's generous investment. And as much as I appreciate him looking out for me, I'm also deeply annoyed by the fact that he just has to insert himself into every single thing that I do, and I made sure to let him know that and warned him to stay out of my business as long as I'm being obedient and following all of his stupid house rules.
As of now, I'm coursing through a rather crowded hall heading to my next class, trying as much as I can to get out of here before anyone notices me. As soon as the classroom I'm supposed to be in comes into view, I breathe out a heavy sigh of relief and speed up my steps a little more. But just as I'm approaching the classroom, my hand outstretched to grab the doorknob, a tall figure stands in front of me, blocking me from entering the room.
I look up to see a tall, raven-haired girl standing there in front of me. She's surprisingly way taller than I am. Seriously, it's either she's a giant or I'm a dwarf. I'll probably go with the second one; I admit to being a generally short person.
The taller girl stares down at me with piercing green eyes that seem to hold such a judging look in them, and I can't deny that it's making me really uncomfortable. She simply just keeps staring down at me, her gaze flicking from one of my eyes to the other as her lips don't utter a single word, and neither do mine, which only makes this situation a lot more awkward than it already is.
When I feel that she's been staring at me for a little too long, I gulp before clearing my throat a little and blinking up at her. "Can I help you?"
The judging look in her eyes instantly turns into a friendlier and more welcoming one, and a warm smile spreads across her face. "Actually, you can," She finally speaks before sticking her hand out to me. "Lauren Jauregui," She introduces herself. "Nice to meet you."
I bite my lip as I look down at her outstretched hand, contemplating whether I should take it or not. I dwell on it for a few seconds, but then, I come to the conclusion that I should stop being a coward and talk to other people if I wish to have friends here. And even though the look she gave me earlier was rather strange, this girl is attempting to polite, and it would be rude to turn her down and take off running down the hall like my inner self is telling me to do. Eventually, I bring my slightly shaking hand up to hers and take it in mind, giving it a light shake.
"I'm Camila-"
"Cabello," She cuts me off. "I know."
How on Earth does she know who I am?
I raise an eyebrow at her momentarily, but I don't say anything; because there really isn't anything that I can say at this point. I simply bite my lip and look away from her gaze for a second.
"I've heard a lot of things about you," Lauren says and I return my gaze to her vibrant green eyes. "Good things I hope."
"Oh, very good things," I look up at her to see her smiling warmly. "You seem like a pretty cool girl." She chirps, and I smile politely at her words. "Thank you."
"So," Lauren starts. "How would you like to sit with me and my friends at lunch today?"
I don't say anything for a good three seconds, maybe. I don't know about this, really. I didn't like the look she gave me earlier one bit, and for some reason I'm getting the vibes that she's a total stuck-up. But then again, I should never judge a book by its cover. Maybe that's how she looks at all the new kids?
Eventually, I get my shit together and look her in the eyes. I suppose it won't hurt me to meet some more people. Offering a smile, I nod in response to her offer.
"Sure."
Lauren's eyes light up as soon as the word leaves my mouth. "Great!" She chirps. "I have to get to class now," She hugs her books a bit closer to her chest. "I'll see you at lunch, it was really nice meeting you, by the way." She grins and I nod.
"You too."
Lauren gives a short wave before turning on her heel and speeding the other way down the hall, and I breathe out a heavy sigh as I steps closer to the classroom and open the door to go inside.
Third hour keeps dragging on for so long, I almost fall asleep three times. This class is just really boring, and the fact that I was up late last night group texting Sandra and Marielle doesn't help at all. I know that it's not a relevant reason to stay up at night, but I had already missed talking to them, and they both happened to be up at that time, so I got a bit carried away. I had originally planned on face timing them, but Ally was sleeping on the other side of the room and it would've been rude to disturb her like that.
I look up at the clock on the wall across from me and almost sigh in relief. Two minutes. Thank God, I'll be out of here soon.
Geometry was never a favorite subject of mine. I've never liked just sitting there in a classroom and listening to a teacher talking about numerous shapes and measures that I have no idea whatsoever what I'm going to do with in my everyday life. I have no interest in becoming an engineer or an architect of some sort, so I don't understand just why I have to sit here in this classroom and have to force myself to try and pay even a little bit of attention to whatever the teacher is talking about if I don't want to fail in this class at the end of the semester.
It's not that I'm bad at the subject, really, in fact, my grades on it thus far are actually decent, it's just that geometry requires a lot of measuring and theory learning and I personally couldn't think of anything more annoying. I hate having to memorize stuff, I prefer to just understand, be given a formula to work with and then carry on from there on my own. That's probably why I would trade doing geometry for doing equations any day. It's so much easier and a lot more fun.
The sudden ringing of the bell, signaling that lunch break has started, causes me to jolt a little in my seat and blink a few times, but I waste no time stuffing my things in my backpack and hurrying out of the classroom as fast as I can. I make my way around the building towards the cafeteria, where I'm supposed to be having lunch with Lauren as promised.
I haven't really thought much about our conversation earlier, even though, as a new kid, this is supposed to be a big deal for me, I haven't even been here a week and I've already been invited for lunch by a group of people. I was originally planning on having lunch with Ally today, but this is good chance to expand my circle a little beyond her. I really don't know if Lauren and I would get along, though, but it won't hurt to find out.
I soon find myself outside the cafeteria, and I push the doors open and step inside, scanning the room for Lauren. A second later, I hear my name being called and I immediately turn my head in the direction of the sound to see Lauren with a few other girls sitting at a table somewhere in the middle of the room.
"Over here," Lauren waves me over and I smile at her before my feet proceed to guide me towards their table. "Hey," I say once there. "Hi," Lauren grins as I sit down across from her. A brunette with ember highlights sitting next to Lauren smiles at me warmly, giving me a sense of comfort and causing me to smile back at her.
"Alright, girls," Lauren begins after a moment. "This is Camila, and she will be having lunch with us today and possibly for the rest of the year, so I would appreciate it if you all made her feel welcome into our group of friends." She says and they all smile and wave at me, saying short greetings, and I do the same.
"Camila," Lauren turns back to me. "This is Ariana," She gestures to the brunette with the highlights next to her. "She's the captain of the cheer squad, and the current golden girl of the Junior Music section." She explains and Ariana nudges her arm playfully. "Lauren, stop," She says before turning to me and shaking her head. "I'm not."
"Yes, you are, stop being so modest," Lauren argues before addressing me. "She was ranked first in the vocals department by every teacher. She's basically a celebrity here."
"That was one time, okay? I'm all the way down to the third spot." Ariana clarifies before averting her gaze to me. "It's really nice meeting you, Camila."
I offer a polite smile and nod. "You, too."
"Moving on," Lauren cuts in. "This is Madison, she's co-captain of the squad along with Ariana," She points to the brunette sitting on Ariana's other side and she smiles and waves at me, and I return the gesture. "That one's Jessica," Lauren gestures to the blonde next to Madison. "And these two are Ashley and Amanda." She points over to the two brunettes at the other end of the table.
"It's very nice to meet you all." I grin. "Same here." Madison chimes.
After a few minutes of small talk with everyone, I excuse myself to go get some food, and Lauren offers to accompany me. As we're standing in the cafeteria line, I decide to start a small conversation.
"So,"
"Hmm?" Lauren looks at me.
"How long have you been attending MIMA?"
"Since freshman year," She replies. "And it's honestly been such an amazing experience so far, and it keeps getting better every year, you're going to love it here." She smiles at me and I nod. "I think I will."
"What pathway are you taking?" I ask after a brief silence. "I'm taking Music." She tells me. "And so are Ariana and Madison. Jessica and Amanda are Drama, while Ashley's Literature."
I nod. "That's cool, I'm taking-"
"Music, I know." Lauren cuts me off and I raise an eyebrow at her.
How does she know so much about me?
"Don't worry, I'm not stalking you or anything." She chuckles as soon as she sees the perplexed look on my face. "We have homeroom together, I saw you on the first day."
"Oh," I nod. That explains a lot.
We soon get to the end of the line, and I quickly get my food before we both make it back to the table. Some more small talk takes place as we're eating, mostly question directed towards me like, "Where did you come from?" or "Why did you choose MIMA?" But then we start talking about lots of other different things. And to be very honest, all of them sound really intelligent. They also have good senses of humor and carrying conversations with them didn't require too much effort. To be honest, I didn't know what to expect when I first sat down, but they turned out to be decent enough, so I was able to talk to them comfortably, which is a relief. I suppose I wouldn't mind sitting with them at lunch a couple more times.
As we're all engaged in our conversation, Jessica looks over to the entrance of the cafeteria and snort a little before looking back down at her food. "Here they come," She mutters. "The lowers."
I raise an eyebrow at her before turning to look in the same direction as her to see two girls standing at the entrance and looking around for an empty table. One of them has Pacific-Island features and golden blonde hair that falls in perfectly curled locks over her shoulders. The other girl is African American and has straight, shoulder-length raven hair.
"Oh, God," Ariana mutters. "I thought they ate lunch in the bathrooms now. This is about to get awkward."
"I know, right? I want to pity them so bad. There's no way they'd find a table." Madison agrees. And as if on cue, everyone in the room with an empty seat beside them places a bag on it, as if to indicate that it's taken. I furrow my eyebrows as I observe the action, before turning to look at Lauren.
"What's all this about?" I ask. Lauren furrows her eyebrows at me as she tilts her head to the side in confusion, and her eyes widen suddenly as if she just realized something. "Oh, right, we must've forgotten to tell her." She turns to Ariana and she shrugs. "She was going to find out anyway."
Lauren looks both ways before leaning over the table a little closer to me, as if she's not supposed to be telling me this out loud. "These are the scholarship kids," She starts. "They claim to be the shit, but they come from working class families, so they're practically peasants here, and most new kids end up becoming nobodies like them if they don't hang out with the right people, but lucky for you," Lauren smiles. "You got to sit with us, which automatically means that you're going to become someone important in this school and know your way around here. Just stick to us and you'll be fine."
I furrow my eyebrows at her in confusion. That's the dumbest thing I've heard in a long time. And here I was thinking she was an intellectual. Though, I'm no stranger to this kind of childish behavior, it still disgusts me that there actually are real people with this kind of mindset. What's in a family's name, for God's sake? When did we start treating people based how on how many figures they make instead of who they are as human beings? It saddens me to see what this world has gotten to. Because this is literally where all the cruelty in the outside world starts - right here in high school. If mere teenagers start looking at numbers and status before character and intelligence, they'll grow into adults with the same backward mindset, and the cycle continues.
"Though," Lauren continues. "I suppose your roommate is one of them. Ally Hernandez, isn't she?" She asks and I nod slowly as I flick my gaze between her and Ariana. "Yeah, so what?"
"So everything!" Ariana states like it's the most obvious thing ever. "Word of advice, Camila, the scholarship kids are trouble, and some of them are even thieves. I don't know about this Ally, but if I were you, I'd lock all my designer purses in a drawer and swallow the key. Besides, being around her isn't going to be good for your blossoming reputation here, so just avoid her whenever you can, okay? And like Lauren said, stick to us and you're going to be fine."
I simply just stare at them incredulously, flicking my gaze from one of them to the other, too stunned to speak. I think I lost brain cells listening to both of them wasting their breath like that.
"Can I ask you guys a logic question?"
Lauren nods quickly. "Yeah, of course. Go ahead."
"Do you know Ally?"
They both raise an eyebrow at me before glancing at each other momentarily. "Um, yeah..."
"No," I say. "What I meant was do you really know her? Have you ever sat down to talk to her to find out what she's really like? Or what exactly are you basing these opinions of yours on?"
Neither of them says a word, just as I'd expected. "Exactly," I continue. "You don't know her. Therefore, you have absolutely no right to assume she could be a thief or to assume anything at all about her when you don't even know her. More so, Ally's my friend, and as her friend, I will not tolerate any insults directed towards her in my presence. And I'd be damned if I just sit there and watch you two slap labels on people as if they were lifeless dolls."
By the time I'm done, both of their eyes are wide, and their jaws hang open. I didn't expect their reactions to be any different, honestly. It seems to me like no one has ever had the guts to give them a reality check before, and now that someone finally has, they're overwhelmed. After staring at me for over ten seconds, Lauren's eyes narrow into thin slits as she leans over the table closer to me.
"Do you have any idea what you just said?"
I give a sharp nod. "I'm very well aware of every syllable that came out of my mouth and I stand by it. On the contrary, it doesn't seem like either one of you was aware that you were spewing complete nonsense for last few minutes. And I'm honestly very surprised, with your level of intelligence, that you would affirm such things instead of trying to use your positions to change them. And truth be told, I'd rather go sit with the 'peasants' than with such shallow-minded people."
I stand up at the same moment that Lauren does. "Camila, I swear, if you leave this table, you're never coming back. Last chance to change your words."
"I'd rather not come back, actually," I give her a sarcastic smile. "And as I told you before, I stand by my words, and I don't plan on changing them any time soon."
Lauren's eyes narrow impossibly more as she inches her face a little closer to mine. "Listen, sweetie," She starts. "Just because you're a Cabello doesn't mean that you get to go around telling everyone what's wrong and what's right, especially not me. But if this is how you're gonna play, then I promise you that the rest of your days here will be straight-out-of-hell nightmares, and I will personally make sure of that." I bet she thought she sounded intimidating in her head.
I simply tilt my head to the side and smile.
"I look forward to seeing that happen."
Without another word, I pick up my tray and walk away from their table, my feet guiding me towards another one on the other side of the room where a certain duo of girls sit eating lunch by themselves. I don't regret a single word that came out of my mouth. Truly, I don't, even if it means I'll be treated like an outcast from now on. I was brought up to treat other people with equality, compassion and respect, I believe that everybody is equal no matter who they are. Nobody deserves to feel like they're less than anybody else or like they're not enough.
I take in a short breath as I keep nearing where they are and put on a soft smile as I approach them. I lock gazes with the blonde one who's sitting right across from where I am and she raises a brow at me in surprise before turning to the other girl and whispering something to her, causing her to take note of me approaching.
"Hi," I say once I'm there and they both turn to look at me. "Hey," The blonde one says. "Sorry, but I'm not taking requests for papers so early on in the year. But just so you know, it's ten dollars a page now."
I furrow my brows in confusion. "What?"
At my response, she appears even more confused, and shares a quick glance with the other girl. "Aren't you here to ask me to write a paper for you?"
"Um, no?" I state. "I was actually wondering if I could sit with you two, if you don't mind, of course."
They both blink at me in clear shock, and share glances once again. "You," The black girl points at me. "Want to sit with us?" She gestures between the two of them, and I nod slowly, my eyes traveling from one of them to another.
"Yeah?"
The blonde lets out a dry laugh. "I saw you getting up from Lauren's table just now," She points behind me. "If this is some sick prank she put you up to, New Girl, go back and tell her it was very funny."
"This is not a prank," I defend myself. "I genuinely want to sit here. Apparently, every other empty seat in the room is taken by a backpack, and I've had quite enough of Lauren's bullshit if you ask me."
They still seem confused and unconvinced. "Are you sure?" The raven-haired girl asks. "This could potentially destroy your social life here."
"Can I sit here or not?" I grow so impatient with their interrogation that I raise my voice a little, causing them both to flinch.
"Gee, go ahead, no need to get worked up about it."
I sigh in exasperation. "Thank you." I move to sit across from the two, placing my tray on the table.
"I'm Camila, by the way." I introduce myself after a moment of awkward silence. "And you two are?"
"I wasn't aware you also wanted to be buddies, but I'm Dinah-Jane," The blonde one says. "And this is Normani." She points to her friend.
"Pleasure." I acknowledge.
"Same here." Normani states as she returns her eyes to her phone.
"So," Dinah starts after a short while of silently eating our food. "Camila Cabello."
I snap my head up at her. "You know who I am?"
She chuckles. "Are you kidding me? The whole school has been talking about you for days."
Oh, great then, not even a week here and I'm already making buzz around this school. Yay.
"I swear there hasn't been a hall I walked through this past week where your name hasn't been mentioned." She continues. "You've built yourself quite a reputation here, and a good one at that. So if you don't mind me asking, why did you choose to sit with..." She flicks her gaze over to Normani for a quick second before looking back at me again.
"...Us, when your apparent reputation can land you a seat at a better table?"
"Well," I sigh and shrug. "I might've just single-handedly destroyed my 'reputation', and I'd be happy to leave if you guys don't want me here."
Dinah lets out another soft chuckle as she stirs her salad with a fork. "You're funny. I'm sure you noticed all the looks and the bags on the empty chairs, and I'm also sure that you know by now that Normani and I here are unfortunate victims of the working-class syndrome. Don't get me wrong, you seem like a sweet girl and all, but I suggest that you don't sit with us anymore. Everyone already seems to like you and I get that you're trying to be nice, but I wouldn't wish the crap that we have to go through on a daily basis on my worst enemy, so I think we should try to keep-wait," Her eyes widen as if she just realized something, and she leans closer to me across the table.
"What do you mean, 'single-handedly destroyed your reputation'?"
"Well," I start, before turning to look behind me at the table that Lauren and the rest of the girls are sitting at to see her looking back at me. "I may or may not have pissed Lauren off just now. Long story short, the rest of my days here will be 'straight-out-of-hell nightmares' according to her. So, yeah, I'm basically screwed."
"No shit," Normani shakes her head. " Prepare for what's to come then, because she's not gonna let you live this down, whatever it is that you did."
"You're definitely something else," Dinah adds. "No one that I know of has ever had the guts to cross that bitch. Good for you."
"I still think you should be careful, though," Normani says. "Lauren is known for her brutal methods."
I shrug. "By all means, let her do her worst."
"How are you so calm about this?" Dinah questions. "The resident Evil Queen of MIMA is coming for your blood. You should be getting up to go eat your lunch in the bathrooms by now."
"I'm calm because I think she's way too overrated," I shake my head before bringing a forkful of salad up to my mouth. "I mean, she's just like everybody else here, and I'm pretty sure she has the same insecurities as any other girl, so I don't understand what's so special about her and why she intimidates people the way she does." I shrug. "I mean, to me, she just seems like an egotistical drama queen who doesn't like it when other people outsmart her. So I really don't get what the big deal about her is. And I'm certainly not scared of whatever she thinks she's going to do to me. I've been through worse things and have dealt with worse bullies in my lifetime than Lauren, so she can go shove whatever she has planned for me up her ass, because I genuinely don't care."
Normani chuckles. "If you think Lauren's overrated, take a look at Ariana, I swear these people practically worship her," She rolls her eyes. "And if she's any different from Lauren, she's way worse."
"I couldn't care less about either of them, honestly," I shake my head. "Or any of their silly little friends, they all seem like a bunch of airheads anyway."
"That pretty little mouth of yours is gonna get you in a lot of trouble, just saying," Dinah shakes her head as she swirls her fork around her plate, and I stifle a laugh. "Yeah, whatever."
A few moments later, I spot Ally approaching. She furrows her eyebrows, but smiles once she sees me there. "I see you guys have all met already," She says once here. "So I guess there's no need for any awkward introductions, then." She moves to sit down next to me.
"We were planning on warning Camila about the carnivorous creature that live in the wilds of the high school social politics scene," Normani tells her. "But she seemingly already declared war against her."
"God, slow down Mila, it's only your first week," Ally laughs. "You'll be withdrawing from the school mid-semester at this rate."
Her statement causes me to laugh. "Could be me, or could be her. We'll see who survives the war."
And the conversations continue. They seem like decent-enough people, I wouldn't mind spending the rest of Junior Year with them.
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