Her.
That's what they came to call you before they recused you.
Not 'the hostage'.
Not 'the prisoner'.
Not even 'the girl'.
Just 'her'.
To Simon it made sense. Somehow.
You've been held hostage for so long.
Too broken and scarred to return to your old self, reduced to being called 'her', not by your real name.
It was so funny in his opinion.
So fucking funny.
The fact that you thought that even the worst of the soldiers would show even some form of sympathy after seeing what you'd been through.
They didn't care.
Not even your family.
Of course, only Simon did.
Just in a twisted way.
You never even realized what kind of person Simon Riley really was when he took you in, when he hid your existence from the rest of the world.
"I'm not hungry."
You bitterly said as you turned your head away from him. The clothes he gave you were too big for your body as they hung so loosely off you.
Simon didn't mind.
He like seeing you in his clothes after all.
Your body struggling to fit in the gapping holes.
"You're not hungry?" He scoffed out.
"No."
He'd done everything he could think of to make you comfortable. Gave you extra blankets to keep off the cold, bought you good food that you refused to eat half the time.
"Bullshit. You didn't even eat anything this morning."
"I'm not hungry."
He even made sure the chain holding you down wasn't too tight, that you could stand and walk around a bit.
But you just kept looking so sad and tired.
Kept acting so stupid, refusing his kindness, his adoration for this woman that no one even liked.
At least, that's was Simon saw it as.
Love. Kindness. Adoration.
Who knew.
It began to blur between the lines of over obsession now.
"For fucks sake, can't you just eat? You look like a goddamn stick.
"You probably poisoned it."
Oh boy.
Here we go with that poisoned food bullshit.
How funny that you thought he would poison you. After all the lengths he went through to bring you back to his home?
As if.
Simon stood up to his feet, his feet creaking on the wooden floor as he rose from his chair.
"Poison? For fucks sake, y/n. Why would I poison the food? I need you alive, idiot." You were starting to piss him off.
You shifted back in the bed, attempting to make a distance between him and you.
It was pointless.
The chain around your leg only have you enough space to lay down, not hide.
"How should I know?" You hissed out.
Simon leaned down to you as he got close, too close for comfort.
Even with all the fear of what he would do, you couldn't help but see just how closely Simon was paying attention to every detail of you.
"If I wanted you dead, I would've left you for dead, love."
"Do it, then. Kill me. What a story that will be. A beloved soldier murders a girl he had locked up in his home for god knows how long!"
Simon laughed as his head tilted back.
He laughed at the idea that anyone would even care what happened to you in the first place.
"Beloved? You think people like me? They come to work, try to avoid me, and leave. So yeah, I don't think anyone would miss you too much. Nobody even knows you're down here."
"They'll find me."
He looked back at you, your face was still averted from his sights. He sighed.
What a headache.
He grabbed your jaw, forcing you to meet his gaze as you winced in pain his fingers tightening their grip. "That hurts."
"I don't care." He muttered out as he inspected your face for a quick moment. God, you were too skinny. He'd need to fatten you up.
"No one cares for or about you. You think they'll find you? You think they care enough to look for you? Your pathetic. A good for nothing."
His voice was filled with disdain and contempt at the thought of someone other than himself caring about you, this stupid woman.
"No...you're lying."
"Really? You think that people would spend their time looking for you? Hell, they didn't even notice you were gone in the first place!"
Simon tightened his grip on your jaw, his fingernails digging into you as his eyes stayed locked with yours.
"I'm the only one who gave two shits about you. I'm the only one who fucking cares about you."
"You?" You laughed weakly. "You don't care about me."
You struggled against his grip, knowing without a doubt there would be marks left behind.
"Oh I care very much, darling." He hissed out."I care that my work is going to waste on you. I care that you're so fucking dense I can't even get you to fucking eat. But let me tell you, y/n, all you have is me. Me."
The way you were looking up at him, those bright eyes, those red tear-streaked cheeks.
God, you were pathetic.
He loved it.
He hated it.
Simon couldn't deny that he felt something.
Maybe a sense of regret, pity even.
He laughed to himself.
Maybe.
Who wouldn't feel sorry for a nobody like you?
But that didn't make you any less stupid.
"I'm the only one that cares about you. The only one that even bothered to check up on you after you were nearly killed." He let out a frustrated laugh. "You think your family cares? Don't give me that crap."
"They care...they do." You breathed out as your tears spilt as he let go of your face.
"They do? If they cared, where were they after the accident? Did they spend hours and days looking for you? Did they go to the same fucking lengths I did to find you?"
You wanted to deny it.
Tell him it wasn't true.
Your family did care about you...right?
As if.
Simon was right, and you knew it.
He was the only one that took the steps to find you, to keep you safe. He took care of you for however long you've been locked up in his home.
His hand rested on your chin again, only a bit more gently as he tipped your head back to meet his gaze as his eyes softened, just a sliver.
"Do you really think I don't care, you idiot? You matter to me. That's why I'm doing all this. For you. For us."
His fingers rubbed your cheeks, brushing back your tears as a smile threatened to show on his face.
"You don't care. You never ever did, and never ever will." You whispered out, your teary eyes meeting his as you stilled your crying, just for the moment.
Simon went quiet as his expression on his face shifted to...annoyance?
Amusement?
Anger?
Contempt?
You couldn't tell.
He chuckled as he stared down at your tear-streaked face.
How utterly pathetic you were.
Your family had forsaken you, they weren't even looking for you anymore, and yet, you refused to accept it.
"You really believe that, don't you?"
He wouldn't admit that keeping you locked up was a horrible thing to do.
That, deep down, it would tear him up if anything happened to you.
If you even got hurt again, God help those poor souls that hurt you.
You stayed silent, your chest heaving with each broken breath you took.
"Let me explain something to you something because you clearly are too fucking stupid to understand how this works."
He had become completely focused on you. What you saw in his eyes was not love or care.
"I am the only person you need. Everyone else in this world would walk right past you and not even care to so much as give you a second glance. They don't care for you as much as I do."
It was an obsession.
Total, all-encompassing obsession.