Word Count: 1838
~Sienna
Kayn opens the front door, sweeping his arm to encompass the space I walk into.
His home is beautiful.
Everything is made of natural wood and is open and wide, with floor to ceiling glass windows and doors that let in the nature the surrounds this place.
This is my new home. For the meantime, at least.
The decision to move out, especially after what happened between Onyx and I wasn't an easy one. However, it became painfully clear there was nothing Onyx could do about his need to marry.
I need a fresh start. This is good for me.
"This is it," Kayn states, watching for my reaction.
The place is big, spacious and light. There's nothing to dislike, especially considering it backs onto a forest that I'm going to spend plenty of time in.
So why can't I shake the cold, dark feeling draped over me?
"It's really nice," I muse, setting down one of my many bags. "I forget your incredibly rich."
Kayn has assured me that he will be taking over his families business shortly. I don't have much interest in it, and the politics of it all aren't so my particular taste, so I'm giving him space to pursue the title as owner as he pleases.
"It's no palace like what you were living in before, but it has everything I need." He pulls open some doors, drawing in the fresh scent of nature. Pine, dew and dirt.
"Thanks for letting me stay until I find a house of my own." I draw my hand along the polished surface of a liquor cabinet, noting the dust. He hasn't been home in months to maintain it.
"Of course." He lingers closer to me, rubbing the back of his neck. "And if you decide you want to stay here and pursue something serious between us, I won't complain."
I clear my throat, turning my attention away from him.
The journey here was many hours, and I spent the entire stewing in guilt. I haven't spoken to him about my indiscretion with Onyx the other night, and I don't feel like I need to.
Whatever was between Onyx and I is done. He will marry and I will...I'll move on.
"We'll see what happens," I say carefully.
Kayn points to the stairs. "This is your room up here."
I follow him up. My bedroom is the first on the right. It's much larger than I expected, with a massive glass window showing the extent of the forest that sprawls out toward the horizon.
"Wow, what an incredible view," I breathe, approaching the glass.
The room has a bed, a dresser and an empty desk. Everything is made from natural wood, suiting the pale walls and matching flooring.
"There's room for you to start your sewing as well. I know you mentioned wanting to make clothing to sell at the markets," he says, watching me take in the room.
"This is perfect."
It truly is. I should be happy here.
"You still look sad," Kayn notices, leaning against the doorframe as he watches me take in the room.
"I...I'm just homesick. It will pass," I force out.
I miss Onyx already. We've gone this long without seeing each other before, but this is different. There is no promise of his embraces, his cautious smiles and dry humour. The distance between us isn't the same anymore, and never will be again.
Seeing the view, the territory in which Onyx's governs only makes it worse. There will be no escaping him. His face is plastered everywhere in his Pack, and his influence is always felt.
But it's only the shadow of him. Intangible, like a threat and a promise. It's only real until someone makes it so, and this time, there is no Onyx to grasp onto.
"You're growing as a person. It's a good thing," Kayn assures me.
"I know." I sigh wistfully, looking back out the window. "I know."
***
Two Months Later
I stride down the stairs, chasing the smell of food cooking.
Spirling downward, I step onto the cool wood floor, seeing Kayn in the kitchen. He's shirtless, the watery morning sunlight drenching his skin, coming in from the large window that shows off the forest view.
He hums to himself, flipping a pancake.
Looking over his shoulder as I approach, he flashes me a smile. "Morning honey."
"Hey." I slide onto one of the stools tucked under the main granite bench. "You're cooking?"
He doesn't usually cook. He's often home late has he continues to seek the position as owner of his families business. I've been experimenting with Diane's old recipes she sent over to me, and it's been going well.
"I thought you might like some pancakes," he says, his voice light and carefree as he puts one onto the growing pile next to him.
"What are we celebrating?"
Kayn and I's relationship is complicated.
We still sleep in different rooms. I told him I need space and he tried not to honour it, until one explosive night. Since then, he hasn't pressed the issue since.
I want to feel bad, but I'm just not ready. This is the first time I've lived away from home, in such close proximity to someone else.
"We're not, but someone is," he says. "Look on the table."
I glance over my shoulder, seeing an envelope opened, a piece of paper on top of it. I reach over, grabbing it before laying it in front of me.
"Oh..." I whisper as I realise the paper is a card, with big print on the front.
"It's Onyx's wedding invitation," Kayn says before he starts to whistle, pouring more batter into the pan.
My heart sinks into my stomach.
The invitation has clearly been sent late. The date for the ceremony is next week, meaning we were a only an afterthought in the back of someone's head.
"So he chose Violet," I note with a sigh, brushing my fingertip along her name embossed in silver.
She's a good choice. Beautiful, intelligent and wise. Onyx must have fallen for her quickly after I left, or this is just an obligation he is fulfilling.
"It sounds like it's going to be quite the ceremony." Kayn flips the pancake, almost managing to send it hurtling to the floor. "Read the newspaper."
I look across the counter, sliding the newspaper toward me. I never read them anymore. Everywhere I look I see Onyx, and it's even more draining than writing and illustrating my own book.
My eyes trace along the front page, my brows drawing together.
The illustration on the front is of Onyx and Violet gazing at each other, pressed close, hands interlinked.
A Wedding for the Ages.
It's a love story like no other!
Alpha Onyx proposed to the beautiful Violet Winter, daughter of Joseph Winter, in the town square less than a month ago, and their wedding is scheduled for less than a week from now!
No expense has been spared for such an occassion.
The only explanation for such a short engagement is true love! Perhaps they are mates! We can be expecting heirs very soon, I would say.
I dump the paper onto the counter, shaking my head in disbelief.
"This article is crap. There's no way he already loves her," I mutter, taking the mug of coffee Kayn offers me, splashing a dash of milk in it irritably. "And she definitely isn't his mate."
It can't be true. It can't.
Unless of course, it is. With me out of his sights, perhaps Onyx realised he could finally fall in love with someone actually made for him.
"I think there is some truth to it," Kayn muses.
"Why?"
"I've been seeing pictures and articles about them in the paper like every day. They go on dates, trips and appear to love each others company," he tells me, nodding to the piles of newspapers near the fireplace like I would want to go through them.
All I've ever wanted was for Onyx to be happy, to find love. So why do I feel so miserable now that he's found it?
"Why didn't you tell me about the articles?"
"I didn't think you would want to see that," he says with a shrug. "Plus, you've been so busy with your book."
I could look through them now, but they are the last thing I want to see. Leaving Onyx was supposed to open doors for me, and as well as my book creation is going, my love life is severely lacking lustre.
"I was never in love with Onyx. How many times must I tell you that?" I grumble, ignoring the way my coffee burns my tongue as I take a big sip.
"Yeah. Sure." Kayn huffs out a breath, shaking his head. "You know, maybe his love for Violet is why he isn't responding to your letters."
"Maybe."
I toss away the wedding invitation. It's been sent, which means I have to go. It would be rude not to, as miserable as the experience is going to be.
"Cheer up. You can't be sad eating pancakes." Kayn slides a plate in front of me, grinning.
Reluctantly I sprinkle some sugar on top, followed by a squeeze of lemon. It's combination reminds me of Diane. She would love incorporating sour and sweet into her dishes.
"So, I suppose we better go to the wedding," I murmur, shoving a mouthful of pancake into my mouth. It's dry compared to what I'm used to.
"We don't have to, if you don't want to."
"It will be expected, and I want to support him."
While I want to avoid Onyx, to avoid the pain that will inevitably be dredged up from seeing him with Violet, I want to be near him again. I want to see if there's still a spark between us, or perhaps hint that we were ever once friends.
"Okay. Then we go." Kayn sounds slightly irritated.
"I'm going to start on my dress now." I push away the pancakes, unable to stomach anymore.
Kayn doesn't respond as I bound up the stairs and to my room. I slam the door closed before I lean against it, clutching my stomach.
A sob escapes me before I can slap my hand over my mouth.
Slowly, I sink down to the ground, drawing my knees up to my chest. Resting my head between them, I let myself cry.
Tears fall, but I make no sound. It's a breathless, aching kind of cry that comes from the soul. It digs between my ribs and pierces my heart, leaving behind an indescribable pain.
What have I done?
❤️••❤️
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~Midika 💜🐼