Sarcasm Professionals

بواسطة karateunicornalc

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Hello my guys, gals, and gender neutral pals! If you could look at the cover and read the title for a moment... المزيد

One down, nineteen to go
Mediterranean homesick blues
Bjorken telephone
Brazilian pain forest
A tisket, a casket, I'm gonna blow a gasket
Hawaiian honey ruin.
Hello and Dubai
It's the end of the line

French is an Eiffel language

78 4 4
بواسطة karateunicornalc

MK grabbed a tip and read.

"Paris. Cool, bread and coffee." she said.

"And you know, the most famous painting in the world." Gina added.

Explanationnnnnn 

"Paris France. Home of the Mona Lisa, tiny coffees, and other things that annoy me like you wouldn't believe. Once in Paris, teams must take a taxi to the Eiffel tower to receive their next tip."

Explanation overrrrrr 

Duel confessional 

Sarcasm professionals 

Gina: Sooooo, we won last time!

MK: Because we're awesome.

Gina: And we are so gonna win again.

MK: Don't jinx it!

Gina: Gah! You're right *Hits forehead.* Estupida!

End

They ran to a moped and climbed on.

"Hang on." Gina said before starting to drive.

"Eat our dust suckerrrrrrrrrrs!" MK yelled at the teams behind them.

"How's my hair looking in the wind losers?" Gina yelled over her shoulder.

Duel Confessionals

Police cadets

MacAurthur: Who do they think they are?! Oh ho ho, they are going down!

Sanders: You're not going to do anything reckless, right?

MacAurthur: *Silence.*

sanders: Right?

Ice Dancers

Josee: *ANNOYED NOISE* I HATE THEM SO MUCH! THEY NEED TO GO DOWN!

Jaques: Agreed! Who knows what they are planning?

Sarcasm professionals

MK: your hair smells nice.

Gina: Ummmm, that's a bit of a red flag thing to be told.

MK: Your hair is one of the most voluptuous things I've ever seen, it's hard not to feel like I'm getting smacked in the face with a coconut whenever you're near me.

End

They arrived in Paris and got a taxi to the Eiffel tower. They got out of the cab and Gina grabbed a tip.

"Whoever didn't eat the stew in Morocco has to draw a caricature of their partner" she read "Cool!"

She grabbed a sketchbook and a pencil.

MK posed with rock hands, because that's how fabulous she is.

She finished drawing after, idfk, ten minutes? Yeah, we'll go with that.

The caricature is pretty much just MK but as one of the FNAF robots, because MK seems like someone who'd play FNAF.

She handed it to the judge, who glanced at it and nodded.

Gina grabbed a tip and read it.

"Go down down down, find the cheese so round where your next tip is found"

"Huh?" Geoff and Brody questioned.

"It's the catacombs. Idiots." Gina said, the last part more quietly.

Explanationnnnnn

"Welcome to the catacombs, where ancient Parisians used to bury victims of the plague. Teams must use their noses to find their exit to receive their next tip hidden amongst these rolls of Roquefort cheese."

Explanation overrrrrr

Gina and MK walked through the catacombs, using their phone lights to light their way.

"This place is creepy..." MK muttered, shining her phone light over to a stack of skulls. A familiar pink head quickly hid behind them.

"Was that..?" MK said, getting creeped out.

"What?" Gina said, turning to where she was looking.

"Hm? Nothing, just... thought I saw something." MK said "Let's keep moving."

"If you say so." Gina shrugged. They continued to walk, before walking into a dead end where Geoff and Brody were.

"Dammit. Dead end..." MK groaned in annoyance.

"Chill brah. If we find all the dead ends, the only one left will be the right one." Geoff said.

The screen panned to Gina and MK exchanging 'Is he serious?' looks.

Duel confessionals

Surfer dudes.

Geoff: We're both 'glass half full' guys, mkay? But, I just pour my glass into his glass, and boom! We got a full glass!

Brody: Take that science!

A/n, did you know that there's and actual answer to the 'glass half full/ empty question? If the glass was full but had half tipped out, it's half empty, but if it was filled up halfway, it's half full.

End

"Yeahhhhhhh, that's not how dead ends work." MK sighed.

"They're not like mysterious rooms in horror movies. They don't disappear as soon as you know of their existence." Gina said. 

"Are you sure?" Brody said, scratching his head.

"Yeah. I'll mark the wall so we know we've been here." MK said, taking out a lipstick and drawing a red mark on the wall.

Duel confessional

Sarcasm Professionals

Gina: You carry around lipstick?

MK: Hell no. I stole it from Jen.

Gina: Seriously?

MK: Yep.

Gina: Nice.

End

Gina and MK started walking again.

"How much longer do you think this'll take?" Gina said.

"Eh. Years maybe?" MK said.

The sound of running water started.

"I hear water. C'mon!" Gina said, grabbing her hand and starting to run towards the sound.

They burst out onto the platform where Carrie was standing, while Devin was on their cheese float.

"Let's go!" MK cheered.

Gina read the tip.

"Take your cheese and sail away to where Mona Lisa's on display. The Lourve! Sweet!" she concluded.

Explanationnnnnn

"the Lourve. Home of many exotic paintings I was asked to stop touching. it's also today's chill zone! The last team to arrive here may be eliminated.

A/n, when I first wrote down 'home' I didn't hit the M key, so it read 'Hoe of many exotic paintings.' just thought you might find that sorta funny.

Explanation overrrrrr

Carrie jumped off the platform, landing in Devin's arms.

Gina gave her a thumbs up.

Mk pushed out another cheese float and they both jumped onto it and started to paddle.

They reached the stairs with the Best Friends behind them.

Both teams started pushing their cheese wheels to the chill zone.

Gina and MK arrived a second before the best friends.

"Sarcasm professionals, fourth, Best friends, fifth!" Don said.

-Lmao, putting this scene in because it's funny.-

Blah blah blah, sister's in tenth...

"And if it isn't noah and his ark." Chris said, stopping the TV pros from entering the chill zone.

"Twenty minute penalty."

"Wha-what?! Why!?" Owen exclaimed.

"Because the challenge was to sail the cheese down the river." Don said.

"But it's inside me! I am cheese!" owen exclaimed.

"That you are, kooky. Now let's just hope you aren't in last place." Don shrugged.

-Blah blah blah, time passes-

Duel confessional

Owen: I'll feel so bad if my love of cheese get's us eliminated. And the worst part is... I COULD REALLY GO FOR SOME CHEESE RIGHT NOW! *Sobs.* I HAVE NO SELF CONTROL! *Sobs.* I'M LIKE A DOG!!!

Noah: *Hits him with a newspaper.* bad partner! bad!

A/n, ayo? 🤨📸

End











Author's note

tennis rivals went home if anyone forgot.

Aaaaaaaaaaaanyway, how's everyone liking the book so far?

I'm thinking about putting Gina and MK in an alliance with Carrie and Devin. Thoughts?

If anyone has any other ideas for alliances or when and how to form them, feel free to share.

Bye!

Word count: 1150 (The chapters in this book are probably going to be pretty short, so sorry for that)

-Chinchilla ✨

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