Kelly stood outside of Med, looking up at the sky, which was tar-black, and the large clouds that were moving closer. The tapping on the ground was light, and then it became a pitter-patter. People ran for cover outside, and umbrellas were opened as the clouds spat out their beads of water. Puddles began plinking as the rainfall became heavier. Kelly stood there, allowing the rain to soak him.
A strong gust of wind blew against his face. Bright, flashing lightning lit up the sky like fireworks, banging, crashing thunder roaring furiously, sizzling, electrifying lightning zipping across the sky.
Boden happened to look out the window and saw Kelly standing motionless in the storm. "Severide, what the hell are you doing?" Boden asked as he pulled him back inside Med. "Are you trying to get struck by lightning?" He questioned him, looking at him like he was insane.
Kelly didn't respond or move; he just stood there. He looked so broken and lost.
Boden took a moment to observe him; he was drenched by the rain. His face was expressionless, but the heartbreak reflection in his eyes told Boden that something was wrong. "Severide, what is going on? Is Stella, okay? Is it the baby?"
It was then that the rest of the firehouse noticed Boden and Kelly standing by Med's entrance. They slowly walked over to them.
Kelly's eyes connected with Boden's; his voice is hoarse, but Boden and the rest of the firehouse heard him say "I'm going to lose my wife, and there is nothing I can do to save her." He had a lump in his throat and was blinking away the tears. He felt like someone had ripped his heart out and tossed it across the other side of the room. There was a burning, agonizing pain in his chest.
Stella played with her wedding band as she wondered where Kelly was. It's been an hour since he said he needed air. She knows he's angry, and he's hurting. She wants to comfort him. She wants to convince him that she is making the right choice. She has been crying non-stop since he walked away.
"Knock, knock," Brett said as she walked into the room. "Are you up for some visitors?"
"Of course." She says this as she clears her throat and wipes her tears. She gave them a fake smile. She watches as Brett, Violet, Casey, and Boden enter the room. She was hoping Kelly was behind them, but no such luck.
" Maggie said that you can receive visitors, but only four at a time. " Brett said as she looked down at the floor.
Stella watched her for a bit, then looked at Violet, who was also looking at the floor. Casey and Boden were both standing with their hands in their pockets; they both looked devastated. She sighed. "I take it you guys know about my situation." She said this, noticing how they were all acting.
"We do," Casey says. " Maggie filled us in. "
"Severide told her it was okay to tell us; I hope you're not upset that we know," Violet told her.
"Is Kelly still here?" she asked, looking at Casey.
"Of course, he is." Casey's eyes met hers surprisedly. "Where else will he be?" He asked as he watched her play with her ring. He looked over at Brett, who also had a confused look on her face.
"Girl, you know as long as you're in here, that man isn't going anywhere," Violet said.
" She's right; he wouldn't leave years ago when you were in here after that hotel fire, even after he was banned from the hospital. He stays outside, worried about you." Casey says she gave him a little smile.
"And that man lived in this hospital after the explosion; he never left your side," Brett added.
Stella closed her eyes as she remembered Kelly telling her. I'm not going anywhere. But she's afraid that this time he won't be back. He hates her too much.
"Stella, he's hurting and he's scared." Boden told her, "He'll come around; he just needs to process everything. That man loves you too damn much to just walk away."
"I know. I'm scared too." She tells them as a few tears fall. "This baby is a part of me; I can't..." She cries harder.
Brett walks over to her and hugs her. "Do you think I'm doing the right thing?" Stella asks, looking at Brett. Her eyes begged Brett to agree with her. She just needs someone on her side—someone to understand why she can't abort her baby. She needs some positive support. Support she's not getting from her husband and probably never will.
The four of them exchanged looks. "If I was in your situation. I would risk my life for my child too." Brett told her honestly. She cupped Stella's face, fighting back her tears. "The odds might not be in your favor, but I believe you can be that percent that beats this."
And for the first time since Stella was told the horrible news, she finally felt like a weight had been lifted off her. It meant so much to have someone on her side, someone who didn't think she was crazy. "You have no idea how much I needed to hear that, Brett." They hugged again. "I just wish Kelly understood where I was coming from and why I can't do what they are asking me to do."
"He will; give him time. Severide is a wise man." Violet told her.
Casey gave Brett a disturbed look. Clearly not believing she's supporting Stella's decision. "What the hell is wrong with you ladies?"
They all turned their attention to Casey, saying, "Severide and I can't be the only ones who think this decision is ridiculous." He asked in a frustrated voice.
"Casey..." Boden said.
"Are you telling me you support this decision, Chief? Do you think this is a smart decision?"
"It's not my decision to make or my place to say anything. I am choosing to stay positive, and I will support Stella's decision." Boden said, giving Stella a supportive smile.
"Thank you, Chief," Stella replied. Giving him an affectionate smile. back.
"This is pure bullshit!" Casey exclaimed. "I, for one, stand with Severide. I do not support it, and I will not support it."
"Matt," Brett said as Casey walked out the door. "I'm sorry, Stella, I don't know what came over him."
"It's fine. He's looking out for Kelly, so I understand where he's coming from. I know there will be a lot of people who will not understand my decision. But that's their right; I am not going to let it affect me."
"That's right because the last thing you need right now is stress," Violet says. "You need to be surrounded by love and supportive people."
Boden walked over to Stella. "Don't let them stress you out." He kissed the top of her head. "If you need anything, don't hesitate to call me or Donna; we support you and will be here for you."
Stella hugged him and whispered. "Thank you for the support."
She watches as Boden walks toward the door. "I appreciate you, ladies, I do. All I want is the support of my husband; I can't do this without him."
"Yes, you can," Violet tells her. "You are strong enough to get through this; it's Severide's loss."
Stella gave her an appreciative smile. "I do not doubt that if I am forced to do this alone, I can do it. But I want Kelly by my side; I don't want to go through this without him."
As Boden walks out the door, he sees Kelly and Casey leaning up against the wall. He held the door open just a tad so they could hear the conversation between the three women. Kelly hears Stella's words and closes his eyes. Boden shuts the door quietly. "Are you going to let her do this alone?" He questioned.
Kelly opened his eyes and asked, "Do you really support her decision?" He asked him bitterly. Avoiding his question.
Boden gave him a condoling look. "Yes, I do."
"Chief, she wants...
"Severide!" Boden exclaimed, interrupting him. Kelly stopped talking and gave him a sorrowful look. "This is a difficult decision: whose life should be prioritized? And whose life should be put at risk? where the primal choice to be made is between mother and child. Stella has been connected to this baby for twenty weeks. We as men will never understand the concept of carrying a child and what women go through."
"I can't lose her, chief." His voice is emotional.
Boden felt his pain. "I know. Maybe we need to start thinking like Brett."
"What do you mean?"
"Stella and your child could be the percentage that beats this. I'm not saying it won't be a battle, but miracles happen. We, as firefighters, see miracles all the time." He paused for a moment. "What your wife needs right now is support, even if we all don't agree with her decision." He looks at Casey, who was looking at him annoyingly. "She needs to know we are there for her, all of us, especially you, Severide."
"Stress is the last thing Stella needs right now, from anyone," Maggie said as she joined the men. " Kelly, when I was carrying my daughter, and if I had to choose to end my pregnancy or continue it, I would choose to continue my pregnancy. "
Kelly's eyes widen. "You agreed with Dr. Asher; now you're saying you don't agree with her?"
"Yes, I did agree with Dr. Asher. As a nurse, and knowing the risk Stella is facing, I have to say it would be in her best interest to abort the baby. Agreeing with Dr. Asher was the right thing to do. But as a woman who has experienced pregnancy, I know what Stella is going through. A mom would do anything, including risking their lives for their child. She already loves this baby so much; this baby is a part of her. She needs you more than she's ever needed you before. " Maggie said as she squeezed his shoulder.
Kelly watched as she walked into Stella's room. "Severide I am on your side completely. I don't understand the decision Stella has made or why Brett, Violet, and Maggie agree with her. But here's the thing: you and Stella have a unique connection, and one thing I know about your unique connection is the healing power you two share."
Kelly looks over at him. confusion planted on his face. "Living with you guys for as long as I did, I got to see all the ways you guys connect. And one of the things I've admired about you two is your power to heal each other." Casey gave him a look of understanding. "The only way you two are going to get through this is by leaning on each other; she is your comfort person, and you are hers. You guys need each other to get through this. Don't let her go through this alone, just because you're scared."
"Think about how scared you are, Severide," Violet said as she and Brett left Stella's room. "And multiply that by twenty; that's how scared your wife is, and then picture her crying herself to sleep because she thinks her husband hates her."
"Come on, Violet," Brett said, giving Kelly and Casey a disappointed look.
Casey and Boden watch as Kelly leans his head against the wall.
Maggie checked Stella's IV and her temperature and said, "Well your fever went down; that's good. Are you having any pain?"
"No, I'm good."
Maggie gave her a don't lie to me look. "Stella, please be honest with me; my job is to keep you out of pain and help you in any way possible. So, you lying to me won't help your situation."
"I swear I haven't had any pain, no headache, no vision issues, I'm not dizzy, I feel exhausted. But that's it."
"Do you feel the baby moving?" Maggie asked as she checked the baby's heartbeat.
"A little, not so much." Stella bit her lip. "Is that a bad thing?"
"No, it is not; don't stress yourself out."
"I will be here till seven in the morning, so if you need anything, just press that button."
"Okay, thank you."
"Are you hungry?" Maggie asked, realizing she's been here all day and hasn't eaten anything.
"No, just sleepy."
"Stella, you have to eat."
"I'm not hungry; can I sleep for a bit and maybe eat when I wake up?"
Maggie sighed. " Fine." She tells her, but she isn't too happy about it.
"Maggie, can you tell my firehouse family that I'm not up for any more visitors? Just tell them, I've tried. They can come visit tomorrow."
"I sure will." She watches as Stella closes her eyes. "What should I tell your husband?"
Stella's eyes open, and she looks at Maggie and says, "He won't be visiting."
"I'm pretty sure he will."
Stella sighed. "Look, if by some miracle he does want to see me, you can let him come in."
"Good, I will because I know he is going to want to see you."
Stella rolled her eyes. "But I know he won't."
Maggie gave her a sympathetic smile. "Get some rest; I'll come check on you soon."
Stella watched as Maggie turned the light off and shut the door. She touched her tummy and whispered. " I love you." to her unborn daughter. She then cried herself to sleep.
The next morning Maggie smiled as she walked into Stella's hospital room. She touched Stella's head, making sure she wasn't hot and then started to write down her vital numbers.
"Is everything okay?" Stella asked as she woke up and saw Maggie writing something down on her clipboard.
Maggie smiled down at her and said, "Yes, ma'am, I'm just checking on you before I go home."
"What time is it?" She asked as she let out a yawn.
"Six twenty-three sweetheart, You slept all night."
"It's six thirty in the morning." Stella was surprised she slept that long. She sighed, as she wondered if Kelly ever left.
"Yes, I've been checking on you every few hours. Even though I knew you were in good hands. " Maggie said, giving her a wink.
Stella arched her eyebrow. "Good hands?" She asked in a confused tone.
Maggie realized she had no idea what she was talking about. "Yes, good hands; I knew as long as your husband was in here with you, you were good." She said this as she looked over to the side of the bed.
Stella followed her gaze; her eyes widened in surprise at seeing Kelly sleeping by the side of her bed. His head rested on her thigh. Her eyes immediately filled with tears. "He came back." She whispered in an astonished tone.
"Of course, he did; you are that man's world. He wasn't leaving you here."
Stella stared at his sleeping face. She reached down and caressed his face. "Was he in here all night?"
"When I did my rounds at midnight, he was sitting in that chair watching you sleep."
Stella smiled, but her smile faded as she asked. "Do you think he hates me?"
"I don't hate you." His voice is drowsy, and his eyes are still closed. Stella pulled her hand away from his face. His eyes instantly opened at the loss of contact. "I could never hate you, Stella; I love you too much." He sat up straight and grabbed her hand. "I'm sorry."
" What?" She wasn't expecting him to apologize.
"For the way I acted yesterday, I should have been more supportive."
"Kelly, you have every right to be upset with me.......
Kelly leaned up and kissed her, interrupting whatever she was going to say. "Stella, I will never fully understand your decision, but I promise to support you and be here for you."
Stella bit her lip, not believing what he was actually saying.
"I will leave you two to talk, and Dr. Asher will be in around eight or so to discuss what's next," Maggie tells them.
"Can I go home?" Stella asked in a hopeful tone.
Maggie gave her a commiserating look. She looked over at Kelly, who was giving her a hopeful look. "Unfortunately, no, honey, I'm sorry. I don't exactly know Dr. Asher's plan, but going home is definitely out of the question. At least for now."
Maggie watched as the hopefulness they both had reflecting on their faces turned to sorrow. "Remember, we are doing what's best for you and your baby. And right now, it's best to keep a close eye on you."
"I understand; thank you, Maggie." Stella said. " Can you bring me something to eat?"
Maggie smiled, " it's about time ." She tells her before walking out the door.
"We are going to do whatever they want us to do; if staying in the hospital for the rest of this pregnancy is what they want, we are doing it," Kelly tells her.
"We are?" Stella asked in a surprised but happy tone.
"Yes, we, you, our daughter, and me. We are going to battle this together."
Feeling a little emotional. "You're okay with my decision now."
"I'm scared; I'm scared more than I've ever been in my entire life. And I know you are scared too." He paused. "But I'd rather be scared together than scared alone. Just promise me that you won't keep anything else from me. When you are in pain, tell me, even if it's just a tiny bit of pain. Even if you feel it's nothing, tell me. Please don't cover up how you are feeling because you don't want me to worry. Because worrying is something I'm always going to do when it comes to you. I'm never going to stop worrying about you."
"I promise to tell you everything. I love you." She says she pulls him toward her.
He kisses her gently and caresses her cheek. "I love you too."
"Can you do me a favor?" Stella asks as she moves over a tad.
Kelly gives her a questionable look. "Anything, babe, what do you need?"
"I need you to lay down beside me and hold me; that's what's going to fix us." She told him as she rubbed her tummy. "You make your daughter and I feel safe and content when we are in your arms."
Your daughter echos through his mind; he's going to have a daughter. "Of course, beautiful." He whispered as he kicked off his shoes and climbed into the bed with her, wrapping his arms around her. He kissed her a few times; a few moments later she fell asleep. Kelly lay there holding her as he silently prayed that whatever Dr. Asher's plan was, they would get through it and he won't lose his wife or his daughter.
Dr. Asher walked into the room a couple of hours later. She and Maggie looked at the couple snuggling in the hospital bed. "Good morning, guys." Dr. Asher said as she walked closer to the bed.
Stella looked over at her, and Kelly got up and out of bed. "Morning," Stella said as she sat up. "Maggie, I thought your shift was over."
"Dr. Asher asked me to stay over so we four can discuss what's next since I will be your main nurse," Maggie told her with a comfortable smile.
"So, what's the plan?" Kelly blurted out; he couldn't wait any longer. Stella grabbed his hand and squeezed it. He gave her a little smile.
Dr. Asher sat down on the stool. "So, Maggie and I, as your medical team, support your decision. And we are going to do everything to help you through this. But first, we need to be completely honest with each other, Stella. When you are in pain, we need to know. I don't care if you wake up with a little headache and it goes away an hour later; I want to know about that headache. I don't care if you have a slight discomfort in your stomach or your back—any part of your body, even your little toe. We need to know everything. For us to help you continue with this pregnancy, we need to know everything. You can call me twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week. I will be available for you all the time. That's my promise to you. So can you promise me to be honest with us?"
"I promise, you three will know every pain, headache, blurry vision, hot flash, cold sweat, nausea, or whatever I experience from this day forward." She gave the three a stern look. "I will do whatever I can to keep my baby safe."
"And to keep you safe," Kelly added, looking at her.
"Yes, and to keep me safe." She said it in a sincere tone.
"Good communication is the key, so don't forget that," Maggie told her.
"So, I know you don't want to stay here; no one wants to spend time in the hospital. But for now, I think it's best to keep you here for a week or two. I'm going to start you on some blood pressure medication and see how you react. We are concerned about your blood pressure."
"Is it still high?" Kelly asked.
"Yes, it's not going down as we hoped, but it's only been one day. On a good note, she hasn't had any more seizures, and she doesn't have a fever, her heart rate, and the baby's heart rate is good. The baby is doing well; My main concern is the high blood pressure. And right now, she's at stroke-level high blood pressure levels."
Stella's eyes widened. "Is it that bad?" She asked, giving Dr. Asher and Maggie a horrified look.
Kelly leans down and kisses her forehead, sensing her fear. He stroked her hair with one hand and held her hand tight with the other.
"Yes, it's that high and, like I said, very concerning."
Maggie could tell Stella was starting to stress out. "But we are not going to stress about this; we are going to stay stress-free. The last thing you need is stress."
Stella bit her lip. "I won't stress; I know you guys know what you're doing. Will I have to be hospitalized for the rest of my pregnancy?"
"I can't answer that yet; it depends on how your body reacts to the medicines and how the baby reacts. Now, Stella, I know you want to carry this baby to full term, but in your case, that's not going to happen." Dr. Asher told her in a soft heart tone.
"We can't deliver her yet; it's too soon," Stella exclaimed in a panicked tone.
"Calm down, babe," Kelly whispered as he kissed the top of her head. He knew he had to remain strong for the three of them. He couldn't let his guard down; he needed to be the strongest one, even though his fear was growing more and more intense at the thought of losing her.
"Stella, I'm not talking about delivery now. I want to hold off as long as possible. When a woman has severe preeclampsia, it's best to keep them monitored continuously, and it's recommended to deliver as soon as medically possible. I hope to wait till you're closer to 34 weeks...
"But that's like three months away." Kelly interrupted her. "Can she hold on that long?"
Dr. Asher and Maggie exchange looks. "Some women in Stella's condition have held up that long, some even 36 weeks. I'm prescribing corticosteroids to help speed up the maturation of the fetal lungs before attempting delivery. I'm also going to start you on magnesium sulfate to treat active seizures and prevent future seizures. And antihypertensive to lower the blood pressure."
"We are going to start the antihypertensive today and see how your body reacts, and then tomorrow, if there are no complications, I will start you on the magnesium sulfate, and then we will go from there. It's all pretty much a waiting game now, guys. If your condition gets worse, which we hope it doesn't, then we will have to deliver as soon as possible. I'm going to manage the condition until the best time to deliver the baby."
" Okay." That was all Stella said as she rubbed her stomach.
Kelly watched her for a few minutes, knowing she was worried. "Are you going to start the medication now?"
"I'm going to first run some tests."
"More tests?" Stella said, giving Dr. Asher a confused look.
Dr. Asher sighed. "I know it stinks, but I need to make sure everything is good before I start the medication. Maggie is going to hook up the ultrasound, and we're going to take a little look at your daughter to make sure everything is good with her." Hannah paused. As she looked at her chart. "Then I'm going to do a non-stress test. This test checks your baby's heart rate. And a biophysical profile. This test combines the non-stress test with an ultrasound. And lastly, I will do a Doppler analysis. This is a sonographic test to evaluate the blood flow through the baby's umbilical cord. It can provide information as to how the blood flow, which carries oxygen, is getting to your baby. Baby-wise all our questions will be answered after these tests."
Stella pulled up her hospital gown so Maggie could put the gel on her stomach, and Kelly kissed the top of her head. Maggie takes the wand and moves it around her stomach. "Okay, there is your beautiful little girl."
Kelly watched as Stella's eyes lit up and her smile was infectious. He loves seeing her so happy. He looks at the screen, his heart melting at the image of his daughter, and his eyes tear up as he hears his baby's heartbeat.
"She's got a strong heartbeat." Dr. Asher said as she squeezed Stella's leg. "She's a fighter like her mom."
Stella smiled up at her and then looked over at Kelly, whose eyes were fixed on the screen. The smile that graced his face sort of curled up on one end. She loved watching him smile. His soulful eyes capture so much emotion that she always knows exactly how he's feeling just by meeting his gaze. She squeezed his hand, and he looked at her with so much love and happiness reflecting in his eyes. He leans down and kisses her sweetly. "I love you." He whispered against her lips.
She felt so relaxed and at ease knowing Kelly was by her side. His support is what she needed to help her get through this scary time. "I love you too." She whispered against his lips. They share another kiss, and he rests his head against her forehead as they gaze into each other's eyes. But their happy bubble popped moments later.
"Dr. Asher, can you come closer?" Maggie asked as she stared at the screen.
Dr. Asher got closer to the monitor. "What do you see?"
Maggie's eyes widened in surprise. "Do you see what I see?"
"I do," Hannah said as she got as close as possible. "How did we not see this yesterday?"
"I don't know; I did four ultrasounds yesterday on her, and I never noticed. Her OB must not have noticed it either. " Maggie said as she continued to move the wand around her stomach.
"What's wrong?" Stella asked, her voice laced with so much worry.
"Is the baby, okay?" Kelly asked
Dr. Asher looks at Maggie before turning her attention to the couple. "Well, I'm not sure how we missed this yesterday. We did an extremely detailed ultrasound yesterday, and we didn't see this till now."
" What? Didn't see what?" Stella asked as she stared at Maggie and Hannah, desperately seeking an answer. "What do you see? Is my baby, okay?"
Kelly wrapped his arm around Stella's shoulders. "Whatever it is, we can handle it." He tells them, he holds his wife close.
"Maggie is our little girl okay?" Stella cried.
" Things just got a little more complicated.." Maggie tells her with tears in her eyes.
" What just got complicated?" Kelly asked in an irritated tone. " Just tell us, point blank."
" You're carrying twins......
" Twins?" Stella questioned. "That's not bad, that's good news right?" She's asked studying Hannah's and Maggie's face expressions.
Kelly was surprised he definitely wasn't predicting twins. But he couldn't understand why this was a bad thing.
Dr. Asher took a deep breath. " Normally yes it's a great thing, happy news, two babies is always better than one. " She paused as she looked back at the screen. She sees the little baby hiding behind it's sister. " But in your condition carrying twins is not an ideal choice. We definitely won't be able to wait that long to deliver. "
" What happens if we wait till 34 weeks?" Stella asked.
" If we wait that long, chances are we could lose both babies."
Stella leans her head into Kelly's chest and cries. Kelly strokes her back as she cries into his chest. " How early are we talking?"
" I'm not sure, but probably within the next few weeks, or sooner."
Kelly's furrowed his eyes as he continues to hold his crying wife. " What's the chance of losing the babies if we deliver in the next few weeks?"
"Honestly, the odds are stacked against us no matter which way we go."