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It's hard to fill the shoes that have walked this earth before you. When your parent leave a big mark on the world after you, you're followed by it. The pressure of filling their shoes or doing better is always there.
To my luck my mother is Valeria Salvatore, one of the most powerful supernatural beings to walk this earth. Being the original heretic leader of a heretic coven was a big deal. She was obviously talked about a lot and being her daughter was an even bigger deal.
I tried not to bring too much attention to it, everyone already knew who my parents were. If being daughter of the most powerful heretic wasn't enough my dad was the headmaster of one of the best schools for supernaturals. Being funded by the original family theirselves and the gemini coven which was all now filled with heretics.
My twin sister and I are part of it.
I think these are things you're supposed to be proud of and want to show it off to everyone else but it's nothing like that. I'm instead haunted by it every second. Everyone expects me to step in my mother's shoes as well as the rest of the people that came before me.
My sister Josie was always better at it, everyone else believed so she was so well put together and everyone loves her. I learned really early on not to compete she had one she was the one that stepped up filled in our perfect mother shoes.
I still wanted to be respected like her and maybe I could've been if I wasn't given the defects our family carry's.
I carry the burden of having problems, little outburst with the magic I can't control. I am emotion driven and I feel a lot. Every little comment affects me.
I try to put up a front to prove people wrong. I want them to believe I'm okay and I can carry the weight of who I am just as my sister can but I chose the wrong route.
As I grew up I noticed showing your emotions to people makes you weak. That's what drove me to be the way I am. When I was the weak little girl that had her outburst in front of people then broke down at the mean comments I noticed how everyone believed that was who I was a weak little girl that didn't know how to control herself.
It didn't take long for me to realize when people feared you they respected you as well. I'm not saying I like it but it was better than being seen like I was by everyone else. I took it as an advantage. I was never really noticed if I hadn't had an outburst recently.
Everyone ignored me. I was quick to learn everyone's deep darkest secrets. That's the thing about secrets they can be used against you and that's exactly what I did.
I wanted everyone to feel as humiliated as I was when they judged me every time I was vulnerable. I hated them all so much that I didn't hold back quickly making each and every student respect me not because they wanted to but because they had to or else they would end up humiliated in front of everyone.
I started to use everything they used against me to my advantage. My dad being headmaster and threatening them on how quick I could have them kicked out or how they couldn't snitch on me because it was no use
The biggest advantage of them all was also having one of the Mikaelsons on my side. Everyone knew who my mother had married.
Kol wasn't the most known Mikaelson or most feared like Hope's dad was but he was the last man of them standing and they knew he didn't hold back no matter who it was, not even his family.
I knew he would. I knew my mother had changed him but he knew who to show that side of him. I knew him as the kind person that was always there for me, Josie and Hope but to the rest of the world he was the reckless vampire that couldn't even be controlled by his family.
He came around once in a while to check we were doing good and he worked as a good way to threaten others even if I knew he would never do anything to them the rest of them didn't and that worked in my favor.
Quickly everyone started to respect me. Maybe they continued to make fun of the outburst I still had but it wasn't as humiliating as it was before.
For a while k finally felt free of being the joke of the school being the girl everyone made fun of and it felt good but it didn't last long. I thought that what I was living now was what I wanted all along but it wasn't.
I started to understand the talks Kol had with me. He told me how yes his family was respected but not for the right reasons. None of them could show the world who they truly were. Loving compassionate souls that looked out for their family but even then the world used that against them.
I was no different. I cared a lot about what others thought about me. Even if they didn't notice, the lightest thing made me self conscious. A slight change in tone, a weird look or even a small comment made me spiral into thinking on how I could do better.
Being a people pleaser had to be my biggest flaw. I couldn't feel whole if the people around me weren't okay. I wanted to please each one of them even if it meant I had to destroy myself to do so.
Maybe it would be a good trait if others appreciated it if they could see the effort I put into changing myself to fit their wants.
Slowly I started to realize that what I was doing wasn't how I wanted to be. I wanted to be loved the way Josie was, be respected in the way she was and be seen as something else as the mean defected twin.
My dad and sister were not oblivious to what I was doing. They tried to tell me it was wrong and as much as I agreed with them in my head I just couldn't do it. I had already messed it up too much for myself.
I had already hurt too many people to try and fix me and in the end I hadn't fixed myself I had broken myself even more. Made myself even weaker.
I began to try and redeem myself when new people came into the school. I helped with the help of Josie to tour new students around the school and help them get adjusted.
I never told them who I was and tried my best to keep others quiet on who I was as well. It was like a clean slate but it rarely worked. The act I put engraved too well into my head I always ruined the friendships I created once I felt too vulnerable around them.
It was just an instinct I was too afraid of letting them see who I really was.
Eventually I learned why love was a feeling I craved so much and I showed too hard. One day the new kid that walked through those doors of the school happened to make me fall deeply in love.
He wasn't too well mentally and he made me believe I was the first person he felt comfortable with sharing his story and that made my act fall completely.
Once I got a hint of the feeling I felt when being loved made me fall. It was hard for others to break it but once it was broken it was there forever.
Even if there were so many signs trying to tell me I had to move myself from the situation I couldn't. I was so determined to make it work to the point where it destroyed me even more.
I realized that as hard as I tried to better myself I was never going to get to that point. I disappointed everyone. I was lucky my mother wasn't alive to see this. I knew she wasn't going to be proud.
I spiraled with that thought a lot. I was never going to be good enough to be loved to make others proud and definitely not good enough to carry my mothers and family's legacy on.
A/ n- ok I want to give a bit of an explanation for this book as best as I can.
It won't follow the legacies plot a lot it will be more focused on the twins and their emotions and how their similar to Val and their family. The original characters will be mentioned more and will be around as well.
I'm still debating on having the whole Malivore plot I'm still not sure or I will just do something to kinda make it similar I'm still not sure.
I want this book to be very different than legacies i honestly don't like the monsters and I know that's definitely something I won't have it will revolve more on Val's story.
I want you to take in mind that Lily might be annoying at times but she truly is trying to find herself just as Valeria was before but without all the help she had and how different things are in this time that is modernized.
There will be a lot of flashbacks of times I left out in the original books that I want to share that will fit into the twins lives now.
I've put so much detail into this book so please be patient i think you all know how much these series mean to me and I want to make it perfect.
If there's still questions feel free to ask I will answer them the best I can without spoiling!
I'm so excited to write this book but I also have poisonous love that I will prioritize but I promise I will not forget about this book because it is fun to write!