A/N: Happy Independence Day to all the Indians!!!!
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"We wish you a merry Christmas," Sirius sang quietly, rocking Siria in his arms. He looked expectantly at Regulus, who rolled his eyes.
"We wish you a merry Christmas," the young man sang, threading more popcorn on a string.
"We wish you a merry Christmas," Remus continued, hanging up a wreath. He turned to Severus, smirking.
"No," Severus said, glaring as he pulled apart some more tinsel to hang on the tree. "For a second year in a row, I somehow was convinced to take part in a sleepover to enhance teacher-student relations. I refuse to do anything cheerier than drink eggnog."
"Don't forget firewhisky," Dora said, holding up a bottle and smiling.
"Ooh, give me!" Hermione said, quickly doubling, then tripling it.
Severus glared at Sirius. "You had to teach her that spell."
"I don't think we'll ever have to buy alcohol again, so you should be thanking me," Sirius replied, rolling his eyes. Siria was finally asleep, so he placed her down in her bassinet. "I think I finally have this parenting thing down."
"I think you're full of it." The headmaster shook his head. "But that's neither here nor there. Can anyone recall how we ended up with another 'sleepover'?"
"Luna threatened to filibuster, I believe," Remus said, stretching. "She got the idea from Hermione. She had a few stories that included some details no one wanted aired out, so we all agreed."
"We need to find every single one of her hiding spots and place hexes on them," Regulus said, shaking his head.
"I dare you to try and find them all," Luna said, eyes shining.
Dora turned to her fiance. "I used to babysit that girl. She frightens me. How did I do it?"
"Dora, until a few years ago, you frightened me," Severus said with a shrug. "People change."
The metamorphmagus crossed her arms. "Are you saying I'm no longer fun?"
"Not one of those words came out of my mouth."
"Admit it: the only reason I frightened you was because I knew how to have fun."
"I never said that."
"Admit it. That's what you thought
The Potions Master threw his hands in the air in exasperation. "You knew how to blow up a potions classroom on a semi-regular basis. I wouldn't think anyone would find that fun."
"It is when you bet Charlie Weasley fifty knuts that you could get Professor Snape to stop droning on for five seconds," Dora said, smirking.
"I knew you did that on purpose!" Severus glared. "No one is so inept to trip while sitting still."
Sirius turned to his cousin. "Dumbledore bought that?"
"Dumbledore bought it, a metamorphmagus shaped like Dumbledore bought it..." Dora bobbed her head back and forth. "Something to that degree."
"Wait, where was Dumbledore?" Remus asked, brow furrowed.
"I had just told Charlie the story of Romeo and Juliet, and he was very intrigued with this one Slytherin girl, and they agreed to reenact the death scene in the courtyard..." Dora shrugged. "Apparently, Dumbledore was too impressed by their acting skills to care about the Draught of the Living Death they stole..."
"I knew it!" Severus yelled, throwing his hands in the air. "I knew you stole that Draught of the Living Death!"
"I said they stole it..."
"And these two are getting married in a month?" Narcissa asked, turning to McGonagall. The older woman shrugged.
"I just am interested...because I was in the meeting with Severus and Dumbledore. I don't recall wondering why Nymphadora wasn't in the meeting, as well." The Scot furrowed her brow. "I mean, it was about her. Why didn't I wonder where she was?"
"Minerva, we all agree you have not been in your right mind the past twenty plus years of teaching," Severus said, patting her on the shoulder.
Dora shrugged. "Or I stole a Confundus potion."
"So, you not only impersonated one teacher, you drugged another?"
Regulus's quirked a brow. "And now you're an auror?"
"You have to live a little," the metamorphmagus said, smirking.
"Besides, she's getting a taste of her own medicine with the Trio and Luna," Sirius said, smiling. "Oh, by the way, statute of limitations on wormholes happens to be a week according to bylaws."
"A week?" Narcissa asked, eyes narrowing.
"I think that was written under the impression the week was part of the wormhole...It really should be longer." The animagus walked over to his desk. "I'm adding it to the next staff meeting discussion."
"I'm just surprised it's in there at all," Regulus said.
"Considering all the stuff the Marauders did, I wouldn't be surprised if that was added during our reign of terror," Remus said, opening the door expectantly. Annie waddled in.
"Wait, are all significant other invited to this sleepover?" Narcissa asked, crossing her arms.
"Not death eater ones," Regulus said, glaring.
"Except for last year," Luna pointed out, smirking. "I play a mean Goyle."
Narcissa looked at the young girl for a moment. "Do I want to know?"
"Probably not," Severus said, handing her some punch.
"Oh, come on, Uncle Sev," Draco said, closing the door behind him. He was loaded down with bags. "I think mother would enjoy hearing the tale of how five death eaters invaded Hogwarts and bested an auror, an ex-auror, a death eater, and a werewolf."
"Where were the three of you?" Dora asked, arms crossed. She held out one hand. "All polyjuice and death eater hairs better be in my hand in the next five seconds."
"See, she'll make a great mum one day!" Harry said, fishing out his supply of polyjuice.
Luna walked over, producing five test tubes of different colored hair. "She really does know us well."
Dora's face fell. "I was joking." She shrugged. "But okay!"
"As to where we were," Draco sighed, dropping his bags. "Last-minute shopping."
"I thought you did that a few weeks ago," Professor McGonagall said, brow quirked.
"You can never shop too much."
"Especially when you have fourteen people to shop for," Harry muttered.
"I know this seems a bit off-topic," Dora said, setting down her drink, "but are we ever going to let Bellatrix out?"
"We could do it as a Christmas present," Luna said, shrugging.
"To whom?" Narcissa and Regulus asked.
"For who?" Sirius said simultaneously.
"Not even Voldemort would want her," Severus said, sneering.
"Well, what do you suppose we do with her?" Dora asked. "Because Shacklebolt is asking a lot of awkward questions."
"Wait, isn't that the man you have tied up in the blonde's office?" Annie asked, brow furrowed. She turned to Remus. "I thought you said you found the locket and he wasn't possessed anymore."
"Oh, well, he isn't." Remus stared up at the ceiling. "However, he isn't a big fan of anarchy and he's a policeman, so we couldn't let him go."
"So, he is currently tied to my homicidal aunt," Dora finished for the wolf.
Annie's mouth dropped. "You let an innocent man be tied to a maniac?"
"I didn't have much say in the matter." The lycanthrope rubbed his face.
"That being said," Regulus rolled his eyes at the drama and continued, "it would be a good idea to decide what to do with her."
"We could send her through the veil," Harry offered, taking some punch and a seat. "It would be poetic justice."
"We could Obliviate her and send her into the muggle world." Sirius smirked. "That would also be poetic justice."
"We could always kill her," Severus suggested, sipping his wine. Everyone stared at him, some with wide eyes. "What? She's killed countless people, tortured others to insanity, and would love to do all of that again. She would get the kiss in a court of law. Why don't we just hurry along the process?"
"I second that option," Neville said, shutting the door behind him. "Sorry I'm late. Lavender Brown needed advice on how to revive her Mimbulus Mibletonia."
"Do you even know what we're talking about?" Dora asked, brow furrowed.
"Killing Bellatrix as punishment for her crimes against humanity."
"I'd say he got the gist," Regulus said, smirking.
"We can't just go around killing whoever we feel deserves it!" Hermione threw her hands in the air in frustration. "That is what leads to dictators like Hitler and Grindelwald."
"It also creates vigilantes like Batman and Spiderman," Draco pointed out. "So, I mean, it can't always be bad."
"Spiderman never killed anyone," Harry said, eyes narrowing.
"I'm taking a liberal interpretation here."
"That's just because they're the only two superheroes you know."
"Enough fighting over comic book characters," Severus said, rubbing his eyes. He sighed. "Fine. We won't kill the mass-murderer. This will surely end fine." His eyes narrowed. "But Dora goes nowhere near her from this moment on."
"Whyever not?" Dora huffed. "Don't you trust me? I'm not going to hurt her."
"That's not what I said."
"He probably just wants to protect you from nepicide," Hermione said, shrugging.'
"Wait, what?" Dora said, brow furrowed.
Severus ran a hand through his hair. "They informed me that last time, you were killed by Bellatrix."
"Rabastan killed me after your death distracted me, apparently," Remus said, raising his hand. He slowly lowered it at the number of glares. "Not that anyone asked...or cared."
Annie frowned. "Why would her death distract you?"
Remus averted his eyes, clamping his mouth shut.
"Because they were a couple," Luna said, popping some chips into her mouth. "Truthfully, the baby inside of you should be inside of her."
"Who gave Luna firewhiskey?" Harry asked, putting a hand over her mouth. "She didn't mean it." He glanced over to the potions master. "Uncle Sev, put your wand down. Annie, the death glare won't stop an alternate timeline from having already happened."
"We should get to bed," Sirius said, jumping in-between Severus and Luna.
"But the party just started," Luna said, swaying.
"It is ten at night, young lady, and I think it best to have all my students alive and well tomorrow to open presents."
Remus turned to Regulus. "Did you ever think those words would come out of Sirius's mouth?"
The younger Black shook his head. "If you listened carefully, they almost sounded...responsible."
"Bed. Now." Sirius growled, pointing to his brother. "You, shut up, or no babysitting privileges for a week."
"You don't need me to babysit for a week. It's Christmas Eve."
"You don't know me. You don't know my life."
"Oh, yes, you plan on going out to get another girl pregnant," Severus muttered. "Just what we need."
"Bed. Everyone."
"How is this going to work?" Neville asked, looking around the crowded room.
Remus rolled out a parchment map of Sirius's chambers. "Boys in Sirius's room. Girls in Siria's room. Teachers in here. Non-teachers in my room."
"Uhm," Dora raised her hand, "that's just Annie, Regulus, and me."
"Fine. Couples in here, singles in my room."
"Wait! That's just me, Regulus, Narcissa, and Minnie," Sirius pointed out.
"Fine!" Remus threw his hands in the air. "If you are unhappy with the sleeping arrangements, figure them out for yourself! This is the second year in a row you invite people and don't tell me, so I figure out a sleeping plan and you end up screwing it up!"
"Wait, that means you planned on it just being Regulus and me?" Dora asked, glaring.
"And Sirius, Severus, and me in the living room."
"You didn't know Annie was coming?" Narcissa asked, frowning.
"Not until an hour before we began decorating."
"I don't know about any of you," Harry said, smirking, "but we know where we're sleeping, so we're going to bed."
"Wait," Regulus raised a hand, "aren't we forgetting my room?"
Sirius and Remus stared at each other for a moment. "Severus and Dora in Reg's room. Remus and Annie in Remus's room. The rest of us are out here."
The others nodded in agreement and set off to bed.
The next morning, the entirety of the DADA professor's quarters awoke to Regulus bouncing up and down on beds with Harry.
"Wake up!" Harry called out. "It's Christmas!"
"It's time for Siria to open her presents!" Regulus added.
Severus slowly slid out of his room. He glared at Sirius. "I'm going to kill him."
Sirius furrowed his brow. "Which one?"
"All of them." Severus looked back, watching Luna jump on his bed with Dora trying to pull the covers over her head.
"Regulus Arcturus Black," Narcissa called out. "It is six o'clock in the morning. It is not decent to wake up a lady of the house before eight."
"Oh, shove it," Regulus said, running to the girl's room.
Narcissa glared over at Sirius. "I liked you two better when you had your parents to control you."
"You're saying you liked us?" Sirius frowned.
"It's a relative term."
"Well," Remus said, yawning. "Since we're all awake anyway, why don't we open presents?"
"That would be letting the terrorists win," Severus mumbled.
Hermione popped into the living room, scowling. "Who taught Regulus about the Tennis Court Oath? Because he and Harry have made a pact that they will not shut up until we are all around the tree, and he is citing the French Revolution as a precedent that it will work."
"He likes to read," Sirius threw his hands in the air, "and you can't stop him once he's got a book in his hands. He's like Remus."
"And to think, I used to appreciate that of him," Severus said, glaring.
Professor McGonagall flopped onto the couch. "Why did I agree to this again?"
"Because you agreed the student-teacher relationships are important," Sirius said, frowning.
"But shouldn't we be focusing on the ones that actually need the better student-teacher interactions?"
"True, but most of them would require parental consent, and I didn't feel like drafting up the forms."
"And truthfully," Narcissa added, "relationship building between houses needs more work."
"Well, I see here two former heads of Slytherin and Gryffindor, the current heads of Slytherin and Gryffindor, several Gryffindors, a Ravenclaw, and even a muggle," Harry said, smiling. "I'd say that's great relationship-building between houses."
"We're missing Hufflepuff representation," Neville said, walking in from the kitchen.
"Former Hufflepuff here," Dora mumbled as she left the bedroom. "I'll be your representation."
"Good. Now that we have that settled," Harry said, running in carrying Siria, "Present time!"
"What about Draco?" Remus asked, brow furrowed.
"Oh, Regulus is trying to wake him up."
"He slept through all that noise?"
Narcissa shook her head. "The world could be ending and Draco would sleep through it."
A blond head appeared through the doorway. "I will kill him."
The crew all looked over to see Regulus coming in, smirking. "To the world, I'm already dead, so..."
"Let's get this infernal present-opening business over with," Severus said, grabbing coffee. "Then we can all go back to sleep."
"But then it's daytime!" Luna said, frowning. "The sun is shining, the birds are chirping..."
"Miss Lovegood, if you do not stop this inane chattering..."
Minerva turned Dora. "I don't see this improving teacher-student relations."
"It never does," the metamorphmagus said, shaking her head. "At least we finally convinced her to stop sneaking into his room while he's sleeping."
"What is that child's problem?"
"She claims she was protecting him from nargles while he slept..."
CHAPTER END
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LOVE, ESHA❤