Finn
*
"Hey," Elliot pulled me aside, sending weary glances at Amanda who was stood in the crowd, a lopsided grin on her face while she spoke with Dominic. Why was he always around her? They must've met at the wedding and hence shouldn't be more than mere acquaintances, but she appeared to enjoy his company a lot.
"Nat and I are worried about her," he said as we both watched her. "I think it's best you take her home. I'm not sure she can keep this up any longer."
I eyed him suspiciously. Was this some sort of scheme he and his wife had concocted behind my back? "Why are you telling me to do this?"
He scoffed. "Are you really asking that right now? You're the only person here fit for it. Would you prefer I ask Dominic to do it? He gladly would, I'm sure."
I grit my teeth at the thought of him alone with her. He was no sleazeball, I knew, perhaps even a hopeless romantic at heart if you dug deep enough, but that was exactly the problem. And if he got to know about my past with Amanda, it would make the situation even worse.
"I don't know where she lives."
"Nat does," he stuck his hand into the inner pocket of his jacket and got out a folded piece of paper. "Here."
He made to walk away but I held him back. "Elliot. I'm returning to Zürich tomorrow morning, so I guess this is goodbye."
His eyebrows formed a knot and I saw his disposition plummet. "What? Please tell me you're kidding." He waved his hand in Natalie's direction. "She is so excited that you came. How do you expect me to tell her you're leaving so soon?"
Fuck. Don't do this to me Elli. Don't make this harder than it already is for me.
"I did come for the wedding, didn't I?"
That seemed to only piss him off more. "Right. I guess having my best friend back is too much to ask for," he seethed. His body had began to tremble, and I felt guilty for making him feel this way. Why did I have a penchant for hurting those I loved most? He hid his face behind his hand and let out a heavy breath. "Do you remember the first time we met? At the dorm?" I couldn't bring myself to nod. I counted it as one of my luckiest days. "I was eighteen in my first year, and you were a seventeen year old final year. You acted like nobody existed or mattered, and I thought you were some privileged snob and made it my mission to always piss you off. But you always ignored me.
"We could go a week without talking to each other and you were so fucking melancholic that I wanted to apply for a room change. I hated your guts. Deeply. Then one day I found out my girlfriend was cheating on me and I became a fucking mess. I didn't leave the room for days. I stopped eating or going to classes or meeting up with friends. It felt like the end of my life. Until one night you found me slumped on the floor."
I blinked. I remembered.
"Hey," I nudged him with my foot. He was lying right next to my bed- very far from his- dressed in the same shirt he'd had on for over a week now. He didn't move. I wasn't sure if he was asleep or in a daze. I kicked him a little harder. He jolted awake. "You're in my way."
His eyes batted slowly. His red hair looked greasy and matted all over the place from lying in the same spots for too long. "What? Can't you go around?"
"You also smell like crap, and I'd prefer not to have that around me," I retorted. At that he would be snapping back at me, but he just shut his eyes and resumed his wallow in self pity. I sighed and walked to my table, dropped a pile of books and cracked my neck. Lately, I'd been spending my nights at the library because of him. Simply being in the same room with him made life more depressing than it already was.
Wasn't he worried about failing his classes? I couldn't imagine being miserable and unproductive over a person, a woman for that matter. I knew he cared about her. They made long late night calls and hung out a lot. He needed to understand that people could fuck up and simply leave, and love wasn't a real thing either.
I glanced at the bag of takeout I had gotten on my way back. Elliot was still quiet. I never saw him eat anything. Who knew what I might walk in to one of these days?
He awoke when I dropped the bag by his side. "Eat that. Then you have to get up and go take a fucking shower for at least an hour. After, revise your notes because you're going to class in the morning." My voice was surprising even to myself. Why was I doing this? I should just ignore him. That always worked.
"No," he began in a slur.
"What if you fail? Yes, she's gone. Why do you want to fuck up your education because of what she did? Ask yourself this: is she currently in a rut in her dorm right now? I bet not. But she's the one who deserves this, not you. Now stop with the self sabotage or I'm calling your parents." Using, my foot, I nudged the bag closer. "Eat."
I left the room for the showers and spent twice the time I usually did washing up. I couldn't believe I let myself interfere. He wasn't even going to listen to me, and now I was going to go to bed starving. When I got back, he walked past me out the door, a towel around his waist and the empty takeout in the trash.
"You can be angry and filled with pain sometimes, Finn. I've known you for twelve years now. And I know you can be kind. Very kind. You're like I was then, stuck in a loop of so many negative emotions, but I just want to remind you to be kind to yourself. And be kind to Amanda, too. Please."
He let go and I watched him walk away. I wanted to go after him, but what would I say? I looked at the piece of paper with an address scribbled on it and slipped it into my pocket. I started my walk to Amanda. She was handing her phone to Dominic, and by the time I got to her, she had gotten it back. I fought to keep my face blank. I had already displayed too many emotions tonight. I needed to get a grip.
"Let's go, I'm taking you home."
She stared wide eyed at me, which made her look younger and more vulnerable than she actually was. "What? You're taking me home?"
Dominic looked displeased. I grinned at him. "Yes. Elliot asked me to," I said pointedly at him.
"But the party isn't over," she sulked.
"For you it is."
"But I can go home myself."
"Did you drive here?"
"Y-yes," she hung her head, realization dawning on her.
"And you think you can drive in this state?" I cocked an eyebrow at her. She averted her gaze with a scowl. The only effect it had was make her prettier than she already was. God, I hated to admit it.
"You don't have to go with him if you don't want to." Dominic gently held on to her shoulder. She looked up at him and shook her head.
"No, it's fine. I'll go with him." She moved closer to me and I felt a little triumphant in the moment.
"Well, call me if you need any assistance," Dominic mumbled sourly. Was it his number he took her phone for?
"Thank you for keeping me company today," she beamed at him and he returned the gesture with a smile of his own. I felt a rush of annoyance numb my senses and began to walk away. "Hey!" She called after me, but I kept walking until a hand held on to me.
I turned around and found her, face flushed, catching her breath.
"Why are you in a hurry? Slow down." She stood upright and held out the flower bouquet and her purse. "Help me hold those."
I noticed a cup in her other hand. Had she been holding that all along?
"Why don't you leave that behind?" I asked, staring at the cup.
"Because it's not finished? Duh."
She was a lot drunker than I had thought. She wasn't her reserved self anymore, and was very daring with her remarks.
"It's just water. I'm sure you have plenty at home."
"It's not water-" she stopped and her eyes went wide when she realized her slip-up.
"What?"
"Nothing. Just water."
I grabbed the cub from her and brought it up to my nose. The dehydrated smell of alcohol packed a punch. I fought the urge to clench my fists in anger. She would freak out if the glass broke and I cut myself. Quietly, I stormed back to the reception and handed the cup to the nearest waiter. When I got back to the hallway, she was still standing where I'd left her, visibly struggling to stand straight.
"You're swaying like a fucking leaf on a tree branch," I hissed as I walked past her to the elevator. She joined me, an unrepentant grin on her face.
She giggled. "That's funny."
We got into the elevator. "You're acting like a child, Amanda. Why did you drink so much? You know how bad you are with alcohol but you went and overdid it."
"It wasn't on purpose," she said in a voice so low I barely caught it.
"Then why did you drink so much?"
"It's sorta like... like a coping mechanism."
I frowned and looked at her. She was focused on the doors of the elevator, swaying a little more, though it looked like her conscious doing this time.
"Coping mechanism?"
"Yeah? You know, when you have this act or thing-"
"I know what it means, Amanda. What are you coping with?"
"That's easy. I'm coping with the fact that I-" she stopped midway and slapped her hand over her mouth.
"That you what?" She shook her head. "Come on, tell me." She shook her head again and brought up the items in her hand.
"My hands are tired," she whined. Reluctantly, I took the purse and flowers from her. Something about refusing felt near impossible for me. What a fucking sight we must have been, a drunk woman wobbling on her heels and a very sober man holding her flowers and bag for her. Not like I remotely cared what other people thought.
The valet brought her car up front and the sight of her Porsche brought back a wave of memories. They held the door open for her but I waved them off from doing the same for me. When I got into the driver's seat, she had her head resting against the windshield. I pulled out my phone and dialed Parker.
"Hey. I've got something I have to do tonight. Go on ahead to the hotel without me."
"Alright, sir."
After ending the call I looked up her address and during the drive, she didn't stir or utter a word. At a red light, I gently called her name, but she didn't respond. She was asleep, so I drove with more care. When we finally arrived at her apartment complex, I tapped her awake.
Bleary eyed, she looked at me.
"What's your apartment number?"
"Huh?"
"Your apartment number? Elliot didn't specify."
She made a few mumbling sounds and leaned back against the windshield and went back to sleep.
"Amanda? Oh my God." I got out my phone and dialed Natalie.
"Finn?" She answered amidst noisy chatter.
"What's her apartment number?"
"Oh, I forgot to write it down. I'm so sorry, give me a sec," she fumbled for a while. "Okay, apartment twenty-four on the fourth floor."
"Thanks."
I got out and rounded the car to the passenger door. I pulled it open slowly, and used my other hand to support her head up. She awoke and pushed the door completely open.
"Sure," I mumbled. I grabbed her things and looped our arms together to guide her. When she stopped walking, I did too. She looked down at her shoes and struggled to take them off.
"They... hurt," she whined.
I leant down and steadied her. "Let me help you." With nimble fingers, I undid the hooks and pulled them off. She didn't look like she wanted to hold them, so I added them to my growing inventory of her stuff. When we got into the elevator, she leaned against the surface. I tapped on the fourth floor. I stole a glance at her. Her eyes were shut, and it made me wonder what she was coping with that pushed her to this point. Something she would rather escape than be sober.
After the doors parted open I lead her into the lobby. She rushed ahead, hand running through her dark hair. She stopped at a door, inputed a code and turned the door knob. The door didn't budge. She repeated the action- code, then knob. Same thing.
I paled when I noticed the number on the door. "Amanda, this is number twenty-three. You're at the wrong door."
She looked confused. Then her mouth made a small "o" as she spun around for the opposite door. Twenty-four.
"What would the person living there think?"
"No one lives there yet. It's a pretty new building." She said in a low tone and lazily punched in her code. The door gave way. She threw herself in and nearly stumbled to the ground if I wasn't so fast to catch her.
"Hey, you should be more careful," I started, but was blindsided when she crouched down and hurled out her insides. I stared wide-eyed at the mess she'd created on the floor and some of it that had gotten on my shoes.
"I just bought these last week!"
"I'm sorry," she brought her hand up to her mouth, eyes brimming with tears. Before I could respond she puked again, and this time her dress got some of the heat.
"I want you to swear never to drink again," I growled, setting aside her things while I wracked my brain for a way to clean this mess. And the smell... it was fucking awful. I didn't know where to start from, but I had to take my shoes off first. I crouched down and undid the laces before sliding them off. When I got up, Amanda had somehow undid the zip of her dress herself and now had it pulled off completely, revealing more of her flawless skin and lacy underwear.
*
*
*
please click the star button if you enjoyed the chapter!