Alexa's POV:
I chose to take the bus home that day as I needed time to myself. Time to think, and time to come to terms with the large possibility that my baby and I may not survive the war.
How could I have gone from finding out I'm pregnant to having to come to terms with us not surviving, in the space of a day?
My head knew if it meant saving the world, my life and my babies life was of no importance in comparison to the trillions of people we would be saving.
My heart on the other hand wanted me to run far enough away to protect my baby at all costs. Unfortunately, it wasn't that simple. I am a Luna now, and I wouldn't abandon my people or put Zander in the position to choose between us. I would live what remaining life I have left with the people I love most. I would keep this crippling secret, and spare Zander the pain of knowing, just as Alessia had tried to do for me.
The quiet bus ride soon came to an end. Stepping out into the crisp afternoon air I tried to push my thoughts and feeling to the back, and focus on my next task.
If I can do a little good to help out a friend before my time is up, then I can go peacefully and know I did my best to help those I love and care for.
I walked into the kitchen to find Jax and Ella sitting on the kitchen stools. She squealed approaching me and wrapped her warm arms around me excitedly.
"I hope you don't mind, Zander and Jax filled me in on this mornings events. I can't believe we're going to have a little nephew running around here! It's soo exciting! I'm going to be an aunty!
"A niece." Glimmer mumbled in our mind after hearing me say it was a girl enough times already. The most I could muster was a small smile before I walked over and flicked on the kettle.
I took out two tea bags, two tea cups and placed them on the kitchen bench. I saw Ella frown at my lack of response then look to the two cups in front of me.
I mind linked her; "I need to talk with Jax alone for a few minutes if that's okay?"
Ella smiled and nodded. "Well I have a lot of things to prepare for, so I'll leave you guys to it for a while." Ella said as she left the room.
Jax looked to be daydreaming, and not paying much attention. It was a perfect time for me to poor Alessia's potion into his tea cup. I approached him and slid him his tea.
"No thanks Alexa, I know you're up to something. I could tell by the way Ella left the room."
Well crap! He's on to me. "Jax do you trust me as your Luna?" I ask trying another approach.
"You already know the answer to that. What's in the tea?" Jax asked bringing his eyes up and away from the steaming cup to study me.
I gave him a small smile. "I do." I say ignoring his last question. "What you don't know is, how much I trust you. I wish to officially appoint you as my guardian. My protector."
His eyes widened in surprise. "Are you.. sure I would be the best fit?"
"I'm positive, but you are welcome to refuse of course. This position holds a lot of danger especially now that the war is soon upon us, and I am the main target." I reply sipping my tea.
"I would be honoured Luna." Jax used my title before bringing his right arm across his chest and bowing his head.
"There is something you should know before accepting, and it's a steep price to pay I'm afraid. I don't expect you to accept this." I had an idea that could go either way but knowing Jax I felt like it would work.
"Go on.." Jax says curiously.
"Since I am pregnant, I'm not willing to take any chances with my babies life. This is where the tea comes in. It's a potion that tethers another life force to that of my baby. It will only work if my baby is killed by force. Not if I miscarry or if the baby passes from natural causes."
"Wait, so if the baby dies during the war I can trade my life for his?"
"Or hers.. but yes. A life for a life. It is the first thing we learn when studying spells and witchcraft. Every spell has its price. Small spells use up energy, larger more complex spells, require grater sacrifice."
I smelt Zander's scent and knew he was listening in on our conversation. He was doing his best to stay hidden on the stairs, but I felt his shock and his pain at the thought of losing his brother before his walls came up. I was surprised that despite everything I said, he did not interrupt, he stayed hidden.
I watched as Jax lifted the tea cup. "If you drink this, it is you signing your life away. I need you to know the seriousness of this. This is you signing a contract. This is you consenting to trading your life for my baby's if the time came."
He brought the tea cup to his lips with a steady hand and took a large gulp. There was no hesitation in his movements. I watched his face scratch up as the bitter taste of herbs filled his mouth and throat as he swallowed the tea.
"Do I need to drink it all?" He asked cringing at the idea.
"No, just a sip would have sufficed." I said laughing. He gave me a look that said; 'now you tell me.'
"I would give my life for you and our future Alpha in a heart beat. This wasn't a hard decision, I'm just glad I could help." Zander approached Jax just as he finished talking and gave him a big emotional hug and thanked him for his possible sacrifice.
I could feel Zander's conflicting emotions causing my own guilt to consume me. Zander would have interpreted it as guilt for doing what I did without informing him first.
"Wait.. you didn't know about this?" Jax stated to Zander while pushing him away slightly.
"No, I had no idea what Alexa was planning." Zander answered honestly, trying to see where Jax was going with this.
"Alexa wouldn't. Definitely not without.. you know what, never mind. I guess motherhood can change people. Anyway I'm feeling like taking my wolf out for a hunt, wanna come Zander?"
Zander looked shocked for some reason. "Jax, you never go for a run just for the fun of it. Ever since you found your ma-" Zander's words halted in the back of his throat as he coughed awkwardly. "What I mean is, I practically need to make up rogue sightings to get you running in wolf form. Why the sudden change of heart?" He asked.
"I knew some off them sounded too good to be true. I won't fall for it next time you know. It's funny though, I don't really have an answer for you. I just feel like.. I can breath again." Without another word Jax ran out the door and shifted into his large blonde wolf, he took off towards the forests edge letting a cheerful howl fill the air.
Zander's full attention turned to me. His eyes raked over my face and then moved to the tea. "Jax is right. You would never trade a life for a life, it's just not you. And I don't think you would have done this without talking to me first."
"I won't lie to you Zander, you deserve the truth, but you must keep it to yourself." Zander's subtle nod was all I needed to continue.
"The truth is I needed to say whatever necessary in order for Jax to drink that tea. I asked Alessia to make me a potion that will help Jax move forward. He is dying Zander, and I think deep down you already knew this. If I didn't do something to help him soon, he wasn't going to be here much longer."
My words struck a chord as the pain in my chest felt like my own. A part of it was. "What does it do?" Zander asked a little chocked up.
"It dulls the pain from his mate bond, just enough to help him move on and focus his attention on other things. Don't worry it doesn't change his memories. It will help him live Zander. I couldn't bare the thought of him dying from a broken heart."
"How did you know your cover story would work?" Zander asked shocked at the information I had passed on.
"I didn't know for sure, but my gut feeling was quite strong and it hasn't been wrong so far. I meant what I said though, I want Jax to be my official guardian. His proven his loyalties many times, but today was on a whole other level."
"Thank you darling. I don't know how it's possible for one heart to be so big and selfless but I'm lucky to call you mine. If you don't mind.. I've been waiting years to go for a run with Jax, I'm going to go catch up to him." Zander said while sliding me a sandwich he made earlier. A slither of his excitement warmed the earlier chill of my sadness that began surrounding my heart.
Zander had a huge grin on his face as he raced out the front door. It brought so much joy to my heart despite everything else going on. This is what I need to do. Help heal the pack as much as possible before it's my time to go. I knew then, that I would not allow myself to drown in my own self pity, but let it fuel me. If I die ridding the world of the evil witch then so be it.
I went up stairs and had a quick shower. I decided to go visit Ella in her lab as soon as I got dressed.
"Oh! I'm so glad your here! I've come up with a way to combine the wolfsbane liquid with the hard metals of the armour. It's all about melting it down to the perfect temperature before I can fuse it together as one." Ella said excitedly,
"I didn't even realise you had all this equipment down here. This place is huge." I said as my eyes wondered around the room.
"Yep, It's my favourite place to go when I just want to be on my own. I love this place and the challenge of making something new. Ben made fun of me at first, especially when I made him hold a bunch of the purple flowers."
"You didn't!" I gasped.
Ella shrugged her shoulders. "I need to make sure he was more human than not, that way he might be able to help me handle stuff around here without being affected. He really is the perfect lab partner you know." She said smiling at a chair in the corner.
"Remind me never to sit on that one." I said laughing.
"Remind me never to eat at the kitchen counter." She shot back making my eyes widen and face pale." Alessia messaged me saying how inspired she was after walking in on you too. She's my friend too you know.."
Just before my pale face turned bright red we recieved a mind link.
"Alpha, Luna, we need you to come to the garden right away with anyone else who is able to help! We have been attacked!"
Ed's voice flooded into the mink link connecting to Zander, Jax, Ella and I. We looked at each other and ran out the door. I was much faster than Ella so decided to run ahead. I knew she'd understand.
"Jax and I have an emergency of our own so we will be late, Alexa I know you can handle this." Zander's words made me pick up speed. Something was wrong and our pack needed me. I mind linked a handful of warriors to meet us there as we ran.
I skidded to a sudden stop when we saw forty rogues surrounding Ed and a handful of pack members that were tending to the garden. I stood frozen allowing Ella the few seconds she needed to catch up. It wasn't that we were outnumbered that made me gasp, but the scent of blood.