_____
＠ ᥲᴛ᥉ᥙ᥆ιι᥉ ✧
₍ ₀₂ ₎
╽ ᴄ ᴀ ɴ ' ᴛ ʟ ᴇ ᴛ ɢ ᴏ ｡ ╿
ᥫ᭡
𝗬/𝗡 - 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝗇𝖺𝗆𝖾
𝗦/𝗡 - 𝗌𝗂𝗌𝗍𝖾𝗋'𝗌 𝗇𝖺𝗆𝖾
𝗛/𝗖 - 𝗁𝖺𝗂𝗋 𝖼𝗈𝗅𝗈𝗋
𝗙/𝗖 - 𝖿𝖺𝗏𝗈𝗋𝗂𝗍𝖾 𝖼𝗈𝗅𝗈𝗋
!!
𝗧𝗪 : mentions of suicide.
manipulation.
_____
↳ 𝐓he piano has always been known as a melancholic instrument. Songs played on the piano have sorrowful tunes, but they are played on this particular instrument because it produces sounds that perfectly capture the mood of such downhearted songs.
Each piano key has a crucial role to play in a song, but once you finish playing a specific note, its sound dies down until it's completely gone and you move on to play the next.
Similar to how easily someone can be replaced in a blink of an eye.
One moment, you're a significant piece of someone's life—you're their light, their inspiration, their motivation, their everything. The downside is you only ever serve a purpose in their life until you start to fade into a mere memory, and the one who once treated you as their source of happiness has now moved on to search for another.
Y/N often wondered if this was how their sister felt when Shu left her.
𓏭
Fragments of shattered glass and torn pieces of paper blanketed the wooden floors of Y/N's bedroom, acting as a shred of evidence to the aftermath of what happened two months ago. The locked windows of their room prevented any ray of sunlight from penetrating through and draining the darkness that drowned their home.
Bits of cold air coming from the air conditioner filled all the corners of Y/N's room, a light shiver crawling up their body once the breeze brushed against their skin. They couldn't help but squeeze their already closed eyes even more from the chilling feeling as they hugged their knees closer to their chest to produce even just a hint of warmth.
Just like every other day since their sister's funeral, Y/N's plan for today was to stay at home and continue to be trapped in their discouragement and fall deeper into the pit of depression, traces of anger, and hatred lingering in the remnants of their ruptured heart.
Their eyes gradually glossed up, rivaling the quality of a polished gem as droplets of tears started sliding down their cheeks, in sync with the clock's constant ticking. It was something they eventually got accustomed to doing during the rest of the days they endured without their sister.
Amidst their early morning breakdown, Y/N's phone started ringing. As soon as they heard the noise that came from their device, a groan broke out of their pale lips—their face wrinkling up as the sound interrupted their usually peaceful morning.
Y/N then brought both their arms to their sides, using them to help push themself up in a sitting position. A long yawn couldn't help but force itself out of Y/N's mouth as they rubbed their eyes in a circular motion with their fingertips.
They soon rose from the bed with their arms raised in the air to stretch their body and muscles while a few joints clicked here and there after staying in one sleeping position throughout the whole night.
Normally, Y/N would ignore the occasional calls they got, since they would stop ringing anyways. However, the person calling this time seemed like they weren't going to end the call that easily—unfortunately.
They shuffled on their house slippers and hesitantly headed over to the brown desk by their window, since that's where their phone laid and rang, as they lightly rubbed their lower back.
Eventually, their vision started to grasp the digital letters that were displayed on their phone's the caller ID. It took a while for their brain to process what it said as they were still half asleep—which was pretty evident as they squinted their eyes to get a better look at name of the person that was calling them.
ㅤHaving read the name, Y/N stumbled backwards, obviously not expecting who called them. They bit their lip with their hands shaking in utter anxiousness as they stared wide-eyed at the two options that their phone presented to deal with this call: accept and decline.
Y/N knew that simply sliding their index finger to the left or to the right portion of their phone screen would determine what they would be doing the rest of the day, so they had to choose wisely. They simply groaned and slid their face into the cold palms of their hands.
"The audacity this fucker has to call me," They mumbled lowly to themselves, folding their arms over their chest with a huff slipping out of their lips.
The call was unavoidable at this point, knowing that the person calling would do everything in their power just to have a talk with Y/N, so they really had no escape this time. Already aware of that, Y/N briefly inhaled some air and exhaled it, releasing their nerves to be able to pick up the call.
"Hey—"
"Y/N—JESUS CHRIST, FINALLY!" The H/C-ette abruptly tore their phone away from their ear due to how loud the voice was on the other end of the call.
The feeling of apprehension started bubbling up in the pits of Y/N's stomach. After not interacting with anyone for two months straight, it was hard for Y/N to formulate what to say—especially to Wakiya, who was one of the few people Y/N was close to. All they could do was bite their lower lip, afraid of what would roll out of their own mouth.
"...Thanks for that warm, welcoming greeting, Goldilocks. I don't wanna talk to anyone today, so make this quick."
Wakiya's lips unstuck to let a long sigh flow out. He expected that reply from Y/N, and it was the one time he wished he were wrong.
"You haven't talked in two months, two months straight, Y/N. I've had enough silence from you," He clicked his tongue with his fingers pinching his temples, eyes closed to revel in what was left of his calmness, "Look, I know you're depressed about S/N dying, but Jesus Y/N, we've all been worrying about you. The least you could've done was give us even just a small sign that you were still living and breathing!"
Y/N started to feel the guilt settle in them, however they knew better than to let it take over them. Their ears started blocking out Wakiya's words bit by bit; their mind was more focused on how they would reply rather than listening to what their friend tried to point out.
"...And another thing—"
"Shut up," In a split-second, Wakiya's words were silenced completely. He didn't know what suddenly got into Y/N, but with a tone like that, it'd be best not to question their motives. Not yet, at least, "I get that you're worried, Wakiya. But just in case you've forgotten, I'm not obliged to tell you everything, even if we're close. Don't fucking expect me to get through this situation that quick."
ㅤ"...Y/N—"
"Let's talk some other time. I need to get ready for work. Bye."
Not bothering to wait for Wakiya's response, Y/N smashed the "end call" button the moment they finished their statement. They let out a shaky sigh with their eyes blinking ever so often to stop the tears as their back rested against the cold, F/C colored wall.
They didn't know why they said such things to Wakiya, nor do they even remember wanting to say anything at all.
'Why did I do that? Why did I say that? What am I gonna do now?'
Everything started to become a blur to Y/N once again. Their hands started shaking, followed by the feeling of their head spinning. They hated it. They hated feeling this way. They hated feeling anything at all.
Their fists clenched, hard enough that they could've sworn their nails would eventually draw blood from their palms.
'I can't go to work.'
𓏭
"What'cha working on?" The brown eyed male quipped and looked over the contents of his friend's laptop out of curiousity.
"Just the list of bladers wanting to train here next year," The albino answered back gladly, a smile on his face at his friend's eagerness to know, "I have 30 people wanting to join at the moment, but I really only need about 15."
"That's great, Shu," The blue-haired male praised, "You've been pretty busy with that stuff lately, huh?"
Shu chuckled lightly at Valt's comment as his hair swayed a little. He was starting to work too much again and he was glad Valt was there to constantly remind him to take breaks, or else he would've burnt himself out over work more than usual.
"I mean, I am the manager of the team. I'm just doing what I have to. Not that I don't like it, of course."
"Beyblade sure means a lot to you."
As if a bullet had just made its way through his body, Shu's eyes widened at Valt's remark and his body froze in its position.
'That sentence...'
𓍼
"Beyblade sure means a lot to you, huh?" S/N pointed out, but received nothing ecxept a mere glare from her boyfriend, Shu. She laughed at that reaction, contradicting to the tears in her eyes that dribbled down her cheek, eventually reaching her trembling smile, "WHAT ABOUT ME?! WHERE AM I IN YOUR FUCKING SCHEDULE?!—"
"YOU'RE EVERYWHERE, S/N. I DEDICATE HALF THE TIME OF MY DAY FOR YOU. WHY IS THAT NOT ENOUGH?!"
"Half? Only half?! IS THAT HOW MUCH I MEAN TO YOU, SHU?!"
That question alone hit Shu hard. Likean arrow had just been shot straight to his heart.
He watched as S/N dropped down to her knees and cried endlessly. His body couldn't be brought to move, it stood there stiff, yet shaky. S/N's breakdown started reflecting onto Shu as he cried his own tears.
He didn't know what he was doing wrong. He did everything he could in his power to make S/N feel loved, accepted, respected, and special. Hell, his own friends started leaving him because he was too occupied with S/N.
But why wasn't it enough? What was he missing?
'Nothing.'
With whatever confidence and self-respect he had left in his body, he composed himself and let his thoughts do the talking.
"S/N, I've given you everything. I've given you my time, my efforts, my love, what else could you possibly want?" His voice was equally unsteady as his body and he was unsure if this argument would be worth it in the end, but he had to say something, "If anything, I'm giving you too much. What about me? What's left for me? Have you ever thought that even I need—"
"Get out," S/N grumbled lowly, but surely, "Get out you selfish piece of shit."
...
'Selfish?'
𓍼
"...Shu? You okay?"
The albino blinked and turned to Valt, quickly scanning his room in the process as if he had just woken up from a trance.
Shu roughly shook his head and gripped onto the arm rests of his swivel chair. His breath grew heavy after reminiscing an unwanted memory with S/N.
"I'm fine."
Valt could only frown at that. If anything, it meant the complete opposite. Nevertheless, to prove that response, Shu immediately went back to working. But that didn't convince Valt. He maintained a stern look and sighed.
"Are you ever gonna talk to Y/N?"
At that question, Shu abruptly stopped typing on his laptop, his red blood eyes staring right into Valt. His body tensed up, and anxiety started piling up in his gut. He obviously didn't feel like talking about the matter, and he knew that Valt knew that. However, his blue-haired friend was always too stubborn towards these things and would pester the albino anyway.
He simply sighed and rose up from his seat as his gaze didn't dare cut the connection it had with Valt's.
"Don't know," His back was slumped against the glass window of his office, tapping his thumbs together out of habit while he spoke. As much as possible, he wanted to avoid this conversation, before it could prompt him to say something he didn't mean, "Anyways, I'm pretty hungry, let's go eat somewhere."
Valt parted his lips for a moment, but nothing came out. Yet. He wanted to say more. He wanted to get something, anything, out of his friend. All this unresolved anger inside of both Shu and Y/N was bound to explode at any moment, possibly causing an even bigger problem for everyone and Valt needed to do something to prevent it.
"No," Valt replied, "Shu, I know you don't like talking about this, but are you really okay?" His voice started to crack. He didn't want to make the same mistake he did back then that resulted to Shu becoming Red Eye. He was not going to ignore Shu's issues this time. Never again, "I know you're not over the whole issue with S/N and Y/N, so if you can, just please tell me, what's going on?"
The albino turned away from his friend and stared out the window instead. He knew Valt was right, and he ought to put an end to the undeserved guilt that remained in his fragmented heart. But who in the right mind would want to listen to him defending himself over S/N's death?
"It's no use talking about it, stop asking me," He retorted, which Valt didn't expect, resulting to his eyes widening and his mouth to zipping shut for the moment, "Just let me deal with it. Talking about it to someone else doesn't change anything, so let me handle it."
"...I know, but—"
"Valt, please," Shu started feeling anger bubble up deep inside him like hot, molten lava ready to burst out any minute. He didn't want to do something he'd regret, so he bottled up his stress like he always did and dragged himself to sit back down on his seat to finish what he was doing, "I don't wanna talk about it. Just come back another time, I have to work."
Valt has experienced Shu talk like this, but this conversation in specific was one he wished had never happened.
His usual smile died down and turned into a flat line that rested on his face. He didn't want to leave and that was clear enough to realize, since his walk towards Shu's office's door was slow and hesitant. One last sigh managed to push out of his lips, twisting the door knob and eventually exiting the office.
Valt was about to head down and out of the Raging Bulls headquarters when he felt his phone vibrate in one of his pockets. Slightly started by that feeling and to find out who was notifying him, he dug into the pockets of his pants and took out his phone. His brows knit together once he saw that Wakiya was the one who left the message.
Unable to wait until he got outside, Valt clicked on the notification, which led him to Discord, where Wakiya sent his message.
𓏭
ㅤ
ㅤ
𝗪𝗔𝗞𝗜𝗬𝗔ㅤ𝗍𝗈𝖽𝖺𝗒 𝖺𝗍 𝟩:𝟢𝟫 𝖠𝖬
called Y/N today
they blew up on me
there is no way through them
I'm telling you
they said they were gonna get
back to work though
finally, after 2 months
ㅤ
ㅤ
𝗩𝗔𝗟𝗧ㅤ𝗍𝗈𝖽𝖺𝗒 𝖺𝗍 𝟩:𝟣𝟢 𝖠𝖬
yikes
where r u headed now?
ㅤ
ㅤ
𝗪𝗔𝗞𝗜𝗬𝗔ㅤ𝗍𝗈𝖽𝖺𝗒 𝖺𝗍 𝟩:𝟣𝟢 𝖠𝖬
home, I'm too tired to deal with this
I haven't even eaten breakfast
ㅤ
ㅤ
𝗩𝗔𝗟𝗧ㅤ𝗍𝗈𝖽𝖺𝗒 𝖺𝗍 𝟩:𝟣𝟣 𝖠𝖬
alrighty take care
AND EAT MF
ㅤ
ㅤ
𝗪𝗔𝗞𝗜𝗬𝗔ㅤ𝗍𝗈𝖽𝖺𝗒 𝖺𝗍 𝟩:𝟣𝟣 𝖠𝖬
I WILL
CHRIST
ㅤ
ㅤ
𝗩𝗔𝗟𝗧ㅤ𝗍𝗈𝖽𝖺𝗒 𝖺𝗍 𝟩:𝟣𝟣 𝖠𝖬
yay
ㅤ
ㅤ
𝗪𝗔𝗞𝗜𝗬𝗔ㅤ𝗍𝗈𝖽𝖺𝗒 𝖺𝗍 𝟩:𝟣𝟤 𝖠𝖬
what about you?
any luck with Shu?
ㅤ
ㅤ
𓏭
It took Valt a second or so to decide how to reply to that. He bit his lip and gripped his phone tighter as he remembered the little argument he just had with Shu and deeply wished he never started such a conversation.
𓏭
ㅤ
ㅤ
𝗩𝗔𝗟𝗧ㅤ𝗍𝗈𝖽𝖺𝗒 𝖺𝗍 𝟩:𝟣𝟤 𝖠𝖬
no luck w him either
hopefully ur boyfriend has
better impact on both of
them 🚶♂️
ㅤ
ㅤ
𝗪𝗔𝗞𝗜𝗬𝗔ㅤ𝗍𝗈𝖽𝖺𝗒 𝖺𝗍 𝟩:𝟣𝟥 𝖠𝖬
he better 💀
he can finally be annoying for
a valid reason /j
anyway I gtg see you later
ㅤ
ㅤ
𝗩𝗔𝗟𝗧ㅤ𝗍𝗈𝖽𝖺𝗒 𝖺𝗍 𝟩:𝟣𝟦 𝖠𝖬
okok byee
ㅤ
ㅤ
𓏭
As Valt sent his final message, he released a deep exhale, relieved that the conversation finished, but worried about what could happen next. He tried to shake away those thoughts—quite literally—from his head and once again placed his phone in the pocket of his pants to secure it as he walked home.
While he strolled home, a specific sentence replayed in his mind endlessly.
'I'm sorry, Shu.'
𓏭
The rain poured down heavily on the earth's surface, covering up all the roads and streets with multiple puddles that reflected the beatiful buildings and other builds in the city.
Y/N, although liking this kind of weather, had no idea it would rain this hard, since the sun shined as bright as ever a few hours ago. So here they were, depending on their jacket as their only sheild from the rain and anything that could possibly get them sick with this kind of climate.
The H/C-ette started running for their dear life when they glanced at their watch and found the clock strike eight. Their shift started at 8:40 AM, and being already, purely aware of that, Y/N didn't waste time and tried their best to make it in time.
Their body started to ache and tremble and they were sure that at any moment, they would crumble to the ground. Their pants grew faster and shakier followed by the beating of their heart at an increasing speed the farther they went. And to make things even worse, the rain kept gradually pouring harder for what seemed like every minute.
As they ran, different thoughts and questions started invading Y/N's mind, making them even less focused on getting to work.
Before they even knew it, tears were streaming down her cheeks, completely in sync with the sound of millions of rain drops crashing onto the ground.
Everything was so hard without S/N.
Simply going to work made Y/N breakdown; how were they supposed to live the rest of their life if all it's filled with is absolute anxiety and endless fear that they can't seem to ever get rid of?
'I hate this. I hate myself. Why do I cry? What am I feeling? Who am I to have the right to feel this way??'
They knew forcing themself to suck up and bottle in these emotions, thoughts and feelings and overwork themself to avoid suffering from constant depression was the worst coping mechanism they could think of and use.
As long as they didn't have to think of S/N, everything was okay; everything was fine.
'Everything is alright. I just have to survive.'
10 minutes before their shift, Y/N finally arrived at her workplace—the center for piano tutorial.
Briefly, they shut their eyes tightly and placed their hands on their knees to support their exhausted upper body. They kept uncontrollably panting and shaking because of all that running in such a cold weather.
Y/N took a slow scan at the building where they worked.
It still hasn't changed even after two months.
Just like them.
They fidgeted with their fingers out of habit and bit their lip as a follow up action to stop their nerves from bursting out into an anxiety attack.
'No turning back.'
After doing a few breathing exercises to calm themself, Y/N unsurely approached the door, delicately running their fingers over the doorknob and taking their sweet time before going in and returning to their normal life before all of these terrible events started falling into place.
Once they were ready to open the door, however, someone from the inside opened it, in hopes of getting outside.
This made Y/N take a few steps back to give way for the person to exit, but as their eyes cautiously traveled up to meet the other person's gaze, their body stiffened and just for a split-second, their breath hitched.
"...Niko?"
The rather taller male whipped around to the familiar voice and was equally shocked to have met Y/N's face.
"HEY! Y/N! YOU'RE BACK—"
"SINCE WHEN DO YOU WORK HERE?!"
⌕ 𝙴𝙽𝙳 .