-|| Shattered Reflections ||-
"Unveiling sorrow's veil, where shadows reside, a journey to unravel the depths where misery hides."
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Suthanu could feel the chill of the night in her bones. It seemed the longest night of her life contemplating where to begin this war of her life.She stared at the idol of Maha Gauri trying to get some sign.
Soon , the sound of the wild animals alarmed her. Post war , she could see a gradual rise in the scavengers owing to the blood that flowed in rivers.
" Please save me "
Suthanu stood up on her feet. Who could cry at this late hour ?
As she walked , she took a wooden stick lying on the ground. Her eyes widened finding a small boy set at the target of a hyena.
She rushed to stand beside the boy who quickly went behind her holding her drape tightly. Suthanu pushed the boy away as she sensed the animal was about to bounce.
She clenched her jaw as she fell on the ground with the animal on top of her as she tried defending with a stick pressed on the hyena's mouth.
She put her entire strength as she pushed the animal behind successfully within few moments.
' Being the princess of this land if I can't let an innocent forsake his life ' , Suthanu strengthened her will as she ran towards the animal as it jumped again but this time Suthanu attacked with the stick on its abdomen making it fall down with a bleed.
' Forgive me , Maata. I had no choice than this ' , Suthanu mentally seeked an apology to the fallen animal.
A lady who seemingly had to be the boy's grandmother rushed to his side as Suthanu smiled moving to them.
" Child , why did you come out in this night ? " , the lady scolded the boy next hugging him.
" He is fine , Kaki " , Suthanu uttered gently making the lady look at her for the first time.
" I don't know who you are , Vatse but you are a Devi in my eyes. My whole life is in debt to you " , the lady joined her palms as Suthanu held it in hers.
" Humanity owes no gratitude , Kaki. Any human in place would have done it " , Suthanu smiled gently.
" Not all , Vatse. Humanity is lost these days even royals don't have it " , the rage was clear to Suthanu's eyes whose face turned pale at the remark.
" Forgive me , Vatse. He is my sole reason for survival after losing both my son and daughter-in-law in this war. Please ask something from me to ease my own heart " , the lady's eyes now shined with warmth.
" If you insist , I require something Kaki. I have come from far lands of the south and I am looking for a work here. Please assist me to find a place here where I can live and look for a work " , Suthanu asked politely.
" Didi " , the boy rushed to Suthanu , " Pitamahi , let her stay in her house please. We would also get a companion ".
The lady looked at the boy for a few moments before breaking into a smile.
" Vatse , you can stay in our house. I will show you a place for work tomorrow ".
" Thank you , Kaki. I would stay if you permit me to pay you money for it " , Suthanu's words made the lady astonished. Who was this girl so unchararestic of common people ?
" You can if you wish too " , the lady said pushing away her suspicion , " What's your name ? ".
" Aarunya "
" Aaru didi " , the boy said as Suthanu lifted him up making him smile heartily.
' Mata Gauri , thank you showing me the way ' , Suthanu prayed as turned to look at the idol before following the lady.
It was a small yet beautiful home , noted Suthanu with a smile. Suthanu took the mat threaded by twigs that the lady handed , she also learned the lady's name was Narmada. Suthanu spread the matress as she laid down near the corner of the house. Though the absence of a pillow , made her uncomfortable but she preffered to ignore it focussing on what turn she can take to proceed with the task that she had taken. She also hoped in case she slept , she doesn't scream in the mid by her nightmares.
But before she could even drift to sleep , she heard soft sobs. The child whom she had saved namely Satyavan was crying in his sleep. Suthanu's heart tore apart as she woke up and went to his side patting his head gently.
The old lady was only at a little distance , poor young boy didn't want to ruin her sleep so he was soft.
The boy opened his tear - filled eyes as he wrapped his hand around Suthanu. In that weak moment , he yearned for only warmth and love of his mother. He happen to see in her the same.
" Maiya "
His soft , broken whisper pierced Suthanu's heart. She gently carried him towards the other side where she was to sleep as she sat by the wall making him sit on her lap.
The boy held her tightly. Suthanu held him as she gently patted his head ,wiping away his tears. It wasn't a voluntary act from both of them Suthanu knew but this boy somewhere reminded her of Anjanaparvan's loss.
Suthanu held back her tears as she patted him to sleep. She couldn't sleep after it , the war has truly made lives fall apart. Time was the only way the wounds could heal but people were the base of it. Support to heal was a major step first.
The last she knew , there was only one prahar left for the dawn. She woke up to the sight of Narmada covering her with blanket.
" Kaki " , Suthanu was soft realizing Satyavan was still asleep.
Narmada came to stand beside Suthanu as the latter made Satyavan lie down properly.
" I am sorry that you had to take so much trouble , Vatse " , Narmada looked at Suthanu.
" No kaki , please don't " , Suthanu was soft , " It has been no trouble to me. Children are dear to me. He reminds me of my own nephew like son".
Narmada noticed the pain in Suthanu's eyes that was quickly veiled with a smile. Understanding that it was a loss as well.
" We shall start living soon my child , we are all on the same boat. We will sail through this adversity with our own efforts rather than seeking help from the royalty " , Narmada placed her palm on Suthanu's shoulder.
" We will kaki , I have trust and faith " , Suthanu smiled back as she didn't want to argue. ' There will come a time when you see the royalty as a family , kaki. That your pain is not different from theirs ' , Suthanu thought within her mind.
" Why is that Bhadra that you think I cannot handle accounts? ".
The man was about to snap back when a little girl ran to him.
" Baba "
The said owner of the shop found himself smiling.
" Baba , can I ask you something? " , the little girl's twinkling eyes melted Suthanu's own heart.
" You had always told Didi that she must follow the footstep of Samragni Draupadi right ? You wanted me to walk on Didi's footsteps " , the little girl turned to point at Suthanu , " Then if this didi says she knows to handle accounts , why should she deprived of getting the work because she is a women? Isn't she also following Samragni? The one whom you reverred once , why has that empress earned hatred now ? ".
The men fell speechless, the question that the little girl of his hand asked him. Though Suthanu was curious to know the answer , what had changed over the years ?
" Don't take that name in front of me child " , the man spoke hardened.
" Baba , how do I not take the name that I have solely heard from you day and night through my life until now ? " , the girl was almost on the verge of tears.
The man's eyes softened as he gently pulled the girl towards him.
" It's my fear speaking than hatred my child " , the man accepted the truth closing his eyes , " People have grown to question Samragni's revenge for weighing over her duty towards the people given a bitterness has also extended towards royalty as a whole. I fear our support will cause us to be outcast from this community and that is why I don't want you to speak in favor of them".
' Is this central to majority? ' , Suthanu thought within the mind , ' Fearing each other , they are hiding themself but their belief has not completely lost. If this is the case , it also means that there is someone behind who is spreading the seed of such a thought. Who could it be? '.
" Samragni is the goddess I believe even now child but...", the man composed himself , " But people aren't wrong I feel , why wouldn't she care enough for us ? ".
" Your own thoughts are so conflicting , Baba " , the girl whispered with a frown , " I don't know but I can't lose my faith on the empress because that's the only thing that you have been repeating ".
" You won't listen right " , A angry women who possibly was the child's mother apperead. She caught the child's arm tightly that almost the girl winced in pain.
" Can't you see that we are starving ? People don't have enough food for their meal and what arrangements have the royal done ? You sit and praise them when all they deserve is our curse" , the lady grabbed the girl's hand taking her inside the house.
" Food not supplied ? " , Suthanu's brows curved ignoring the sting she felt in her heart. She remembered Bhanu himself looking after the arrangements and getting the approval of Yudhishthira. The ration not only had to have enough rice and grains but the citizens were to be provided with them without cost measures.
Where was it going then ? , wondered Suthanu. If the dots are joined , the one who is trying to defame her parents is the one behind theft as well. But how people easily fell into trap , was their belief in her parents ever strong in the first place ?
" Kumari "
Suthanu who still stood at the doorstep broke out of her thoughts.
" I am willing to employ you but with one condition,you will have to help me in transportation of my goods as well " , the man said in a quiet hard tone but Suthanu smiled.
" Thank you kaka , I won't disappoint you " , Suthanu knew it was a challenge but she wanted to do it. Carrying such load could form blisters on her back but she knew she had to pay a cost.
If it was only accounts , she wouldn't be able to monitor the livelihood of people but if it's transportation by its sake she would be able to understand her people.
Suthanu wiped away the sweat as she took the mud pot filled with water to store water in the house from the well nearby.
The well had almost depleted, Suthanu made a note of it in the back of her mind.
Suthanu placed her pot down as she found a lady on stumbling feet. She had a swollen womb indicating her pregnancy.
" Bhadra" , Suthanu held her from falling , " Careful ".
Suthanu made the lady sit down slowly as she quickly went to get water from her pot by filling it her water bag. She helped the lady drink water as she wiped away her sweat away.
" Relax Bhadra " , Suthanu whispered softly as the lady burst into tears.
" After losing everyone , I don't want lose my child " , the lady cried covering her face. Suthanu felt sad , today she could help but what about tomorrow ?
She was only thinking when the words uttered by the lady further hurt her heart.
" How do those royals care if we suffer ? Do they even mind if we die of hunger ? They don't care about our food , our living then why did they snatch even the peace of our livelihood by waging a war ? Had they had such a women and she underwent such torment...wait , Karma never fails - their daughter-in-law has a painful life but they are there for her. But what about common people like us if at all Rajakumari Uttara..." , the lady was halted by Suthanu's scream.
" Wait " , Suthanu screamed and later tried to calm down herself. It took all her efforts to stop from bursting out realizing it was the grief of the lady speaking. Though her heart couldn't even let anything hamper Uttara's life.
" Please , even Rajakumari should be experiencing the pain that you do. People being their does help but it does not erase the truth of her life that has turned out this moment " , Suthanu was soft , " Bhadra , I know that it is difficult but please , why would you want to add more torment to someone's life who shares the same pain as you?".
The lady looked at Suthanu furiously though Suthanu took the ladies palm to her womb.
" Would you want your child to grow up around people who disregard others pain? " , Suthanu questioned softly and to her anticipation, the lady calmed down.
Though the lady rose to her feet and left as Suthanu looked on.
Such hatred ? , Suthanu sighed to herself. Today she had saved her bhabhi from a painful curse but such anger might blast towards any of their royalty. It could be anyone in the family.
Suthanu's hand went to her forehead as she collapsed on a nearby rock. It's not that her parents were negligent towards the citizens suffering or absorbed in their own grief, they were taking efforts to rebuild things after destruction.
But creation takes time and this disbalance in lives has created a surge of anger. But before this turned it into a storm , Suthanu knew noticeable actions were to be taken by the royalty.
For now , she sat thinking what could be done for such women. A smile bloomed as she found the way. They wouldn't accept direct help from the royalty even if they held out a hand and even if they did for the sake of their child - it won't be fruitful for both sides.
The men might get hurt by their cruel words and the women themselves won't ask for their needs properly.
Only way is for her to reach out to certain hermitage and request for the female rishis to extend their support to such females. But it has to be done immediately and she couldn't return to her camps.
When the thought struck her , a hand was placed on her shoulder.
Suthanu turned to face a disguised Neerja.
" Neer " , Suthanu got up and hugged Neerja with a smile. Though when they drew back , Neerja had tears taking in the sight of Suthanu.
" Hey , what happened Neer? " , Suthanu probed with concern.
" Look at you " , Neerja blinked back her tears as she pointed to Suthanu's palms , " What do you work ? That all your hands have bruises. You look so extremely drained and why are you sitting in this hot sun alone ? ".
" Neer , neer " , Suthanu smiled gently , " Calm down. I am fine , all this is okay. My parents lived in their forests for a huge part of their life and maybe I should learn to live as a commoner too. Any day what if fate pushes it to me ? ".
Suthanu's humor was met with Neerja 's worry.
" Shush Rajakumari, may such a day never come in your life " , Neerja 's words brought a gentle smile to Suthanu.
" I would love to know why you have come here but before that I have to convey something to my fathers " , Suthanu explained to Neerja the problem she had seen and what could be done , " Suggest the same to Pita and let him decide on it. Also , the well is being depleted in this region - push this as a concern too".
Suthanu stopped herself from conveying the message about food supplies.
" In my eyes , your solution is highly appreciable Rajakumari. I feel Samrat will proceed with it " , Neerja continued, " I came here to get a glimpse of you. I can't stay away from you ".
" Neer , you being over there I am sure you will do the best of what you can. To lessen your worry , ask Bhanu to send some trusted men daily to see me back here - I can pass on important messages as well as you will get to know about me. Return back - being assured that I am fine and will take care of myself " , Suthanu smiled as Neerja nodded.
Next few days had gone slow as a sloth , people's problems in their life was closely fading and they were wondering who was behind. Though they didn't dig deep , happy that life was becoming bearable.
Suthanu continued to help them in silence ever grateful to her parents who considered every message she passed with such sincerity. Though she bore the life of a commoner which was harder than she thought but there was no complains in her heart. There were times when despair would cloud her as well but the harsh penance of her parents made it easier for her as she sought strength from them.
Only that she was closer to the one who was spinning the webs of rivalry in the minds of people against royalty. And , she vowed to end it faster.
To be continued...
A/N:Because I wanted to give a peek of what the situations were in Hastinapura post war. It was quite a chapter detailing on the common people's grief.
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