Lili Reinhart as Ashley. Enjoy♥️
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Yup, I screwed up. I screwed up big time. I should have talked to him or just ignored him completely but I should never have punched him. That was wrong of me. Even I knew that. I was just walking by the hallway with my friends when we saw Carter grabbing Leah to some place. We didn't mean to bother them until we heard Leah's voice, something like Carter using her. She ran away from him but Mia caught her and hugged her. She told us everything and I guess that's when I lost it. I didn't appreciate what Carter did but it was never my place to say anything to him. When I made my way to the Principal's office, my friends gave me a sympathetic look.
Both Carter and I got a day's suspension and even though my mother is chill about most of the things I do, I don't think she will support me on this, I thought. I knew I was right when I saw my mom standing on the door waiting for me, her hands on her waist.
"I got a call from your principal." She said.
"Yeah. I messed up."
"What did Carter do?"
"He screwed Leah, a girl in our school and she was crying."
"Do you think you should have punched him?" I thought about it for a while. He messed up but still, I went a bit overboard this time. I honestly have no clue what happened. I have been so stressed about breaking up with Taylor and I have no idea why I snapped when I saw Carter with Leah. I weakly shook my head. I was looking down when I heard her sigh.
"At least you know where you were wrong. You will cook dinner this week as punishment." She said. I looked up and smiled at her. It wasn't a huge punishment because this is the first time I got into this much trouble. When I was halfway up, I heard my mom.
"You have to apologize to Carter, of course." She said and I groaned. I heard her chuckle. I went upstairs and took a quick shower. I changed into black jeans and a v-neck red t-shirt all while thinking what will I say to him. As soon as I saw blood oozing out of his nose, my emotions changed from anger to guilt. I could see he was in a lot of pain. That was when a pain shot from my right knuckle to my whole body. I looked at my hand and saw bruises forming on them. That knocked me out of my thoughts and I wrapped a bandage around my right knuckle. It will be okay after a while, I thought.
Self note: ALWAYS think before acting.
I texted my girlfriends if they knew Carter's address. I can't possibly do this on the phone. I mean, what kind of a person would apologize over the phone for something like that. I had to meet him. Ashley said she will ask Noah. I raised my eyebrow at her text. When did she and Noah exchanged number? Damn, sounds like a juicy gossip but Ashley is my friend and well, she will let me know when she feels like it.
While waiting for her reply, I almost wrote a script on how I am going to apologize. He seemed chill when we first talked and honestly speaking I didn't think he would treat a girl like that. I heard about his past flings in his previous school. Call me a bad judge of character, but when I met him, I didn't get an asshole vibe from him. I thought he was the kind of person who would only sleep with a girl if he had feelings for her. Sure he would flirt a little but that would just be innocent and playful, not to get into a girl's pants. I cringed at that thought.
As soon as I got his address, I told my mom I am going to meet him and went out. Through the whole ride, I kept thinking why I lost it. I know I have the ability to stand up for myself but that doesn't mean I go around hitting people. When he said he doesn't care about Leah, something inside me snapped. I didn't even think it was Carter's fault in the first place. I was already upset about something else and I took all my emotions out on him.
When I reached the address, I gaped at the sight of his house. I didn't know he was rich but that word wasn't enough to suffice the mansion that stood in front of me. It was painted in white with plants that hung to the side. He had a proper garden in front and I saw two people working on the plants, one was trimming a hedge and the other was cleaning out dried old leaves. He even had a pool beside the garden. Who has a pool in their house!? I went inside the gate and stood in front of the door to his house fiddling with my thumb. I was sort of nervous but I couldn't think of a single reason why. I just had to apologize, listen to whatever crap he shouts at me, know when he crossed the line and leave. I texted him saying I was outside and waited by the garden. It took him ten minutes to come out and I stared at him for way too long than I should have.
He was wearing a black v-neck t-shirt and blue jeans. His dark chocolate hair was set and a strand came in front of his eyes. What is with him and his hair? I thought. My hand involuntarily went up but halfway through I realized what I was going to do and withdrew my hand. He had a bandage across his nose where I punched him today and a frown plastered on his face but I kept thinking how beautiful his face looks when he smiled at me the first time we met. His eyes were filled with adoration and proud and now they were just irritated.
"What?" Carter barked at me.
"Can we talk?" I asked nervously.
"We are talking. What is it?"
"Alright. Um... Okay so, I wanted to apologize for today. I shouldn't have punched you. That was wrong and totally unjustified." I saw his eyes getting soft. He sighed and pulled his hair back in frustration.
"Then why did you do it?" I looked at him in surprise. I honestly didn't expect this. I thought he will call me names and won't forgive me and will throw a tantrum or something. God, he is so confusing.
"Well?" He said pulling me out of my thoughts.
"I tried thinking about it but honestly, I don't understand either. When I saw you talking to Leah like that, something just happened. I flipped." I said looking down.
He looked at me intently for a few minutes and sighed.
"How did you even know I live here?" He asked changing the subject.
"Oh, uh, I got it from Ashley who got it from Noah." I said and he smiled at that thought. He knows something. Great.
"Are you hungry? I feel like I could eat." He asked and before I could respond he started walking away from me towards his garage. I watch a whole lot of serial killer documentaries and most of the time, the murdered takes their victims in some place dark in their house like a storage space or a garage.
"I punched you so now you are gonna kill me!?" I asked and he turned around and gave me a pointed look.
"Just trying to lighten the mood, grumpy pants." I said and raised my hands in surrender.
"I should punch you and see how grumpy you get." He said. I thought I annoyed him more but just before he turned back I saw a small smile on his face. I jogged to catch up with him.
"So where are we going?" I asked when he ignited his bike. He just smirked at me and took off. I caught up with him pretty easily and we both drove side by side in silence. I tried guessing where he was taking me but he took me to an area I haven't explored yet. To be honest, I hardly travelled because I was busy with my academics and shop. My friends and I usually hung out at my house or to a close café. We never went far cause none of our parents were cool with it and that sounds fair to me at least. My mom gave me a hell lot of liberties so I tend to respect the restrictions she put on me. That's how we worked after dad left. An image of my dad popped in my head but I quickly shook it off. No need to remember him, I thought.
After a while, a small but elegant café came in the view and Carter started to slow down. When we came to halt, I noticed the café properly. It had wooden roofing and hanging plants attached to its side. "Coffee?" letter-by-letter hung on the other side giving it a unique look. Doors and floor had a wooden texture and more than half of the entrance was glass giving it a classy yet simple look. I saw a couple sitting on one of the table kept outside. When they saw me looking, I politely smiled at them and they smiled back. I saw Carter already making his way to the door. He went inside first and held the door open for me. I quickly walked up the steps towards the entrance smiling widely. I should have known he was being too good to the person who punched him few hours ago. As soon as I reached the door and started entering, he slammed it right on my face. I held my nose and groaned out loud while moving a few steps backward because of the impact. I totally forgot I walked up two to three stairs. You know those movies when the guy held the girl by her waist just as she was going to fall and they stare at each other for a while? Yeah well, Carter was not that kind of a guy. As soon as I took a step backward, I lost my balance and fell down, butt first. I groaned out load and heard Carter laughing his ass off. I was so embarrassed I probably looked like a tomato.
"You face looks like a tomato." He said between his laughs. Yup, thanks for the confirmation, I thought.
"Jerk." I muttered and followed him to our table. I kept one hand on my nose to lessen the pain. I wasn't bleeding so it was okay. After scanning the menu, I ordered a Devil's own frappé. Carter ordered a toffee frappé and by the time the waiter took our orders, the pain subsidised and I sighed in relief.
"Hurts doesn't it?" He asked while smirking.
"Yeah yeah I did wrong, I learned my lesson. And we are even now. But why'd you bring me here?"
"To understand why you hit me?" He said. Just then, a waiter came to us with our coffee. I noticed his name was Joe.
"Thank you Joe." I said being polite.
"My pleasure." He winked at me and left. I diverted my attention back to Carter but he was more focused on glaring at Joe. I cleared my throat and his eyes shifted to me, returning to its usual carefree sparkle.
"What is there to understand? You saw I punched Mark, why do you feel I can't punch you?" I said returning to our previous conversation.
"It was different. With Mark, you were amused by the whole incident. And you didn't initiate violence, he did. He came at you first. By the way, what kind of guy hits a girl?"
"The kind of guy that taught the girl how to fight in the first place?" I saw taking a sip of my frappé. It was pretty good.
"Mark taught you how to fight? When?"
"I thought you are here to understand why I punched you." I said. I didn't want to tell him much about me. I am not that comfortable around him yet. He squinted his eyes at me and sighed.
"Fair. So as I said, it was different with me. Plus you have been ignoring me since last week. What got up your ass?"
"If I tell you this, I will ask you a question and you have to answer me truthfully. Deal?" There was something that has been bothering me for a week now. I always pondered about it but never came to a good conclusion. It was true that I didn't trust him enough to tell him much about me but I guess one thing should be fine. He thought for a while and nodded.
"Okay so, I was in a relationship for past three years with this amazing sweet caring guy. He is a senior and he is already gone off to college. He is really smart and he respects me a lot." I said and stopped when Taylor's face popped in my head.
"But?"
"I am not ready for a permanent relationship yet. He is the kind of guy I want to spend the rest of my life with but right now, I am not looking for something like that. I want to make bad decisions and be crazy and stupid."
"So you punched me?"
"NO. I mean after I broke up with him, I was very afraid if I did the right thing and I was very guilty to break his heart and I have been bottling up those feelings for some time now. I might have channelled all those emotions into anger when I punched you and I am really sorry for that." I said.
He took my words in and stayed silent for a while. I kept drinking my frappé waiting for him to say something. When he didn't, I became impatient.
"Well?" I asked nudging him.
"I don't think that's all. I mean, you are smart so you must have taken into account a scenario when after like twelve to thirteen years, you haven't found a good person even remotely close to the one you left. And he might be with someone else by then who appreciates him. There must be something else." He said staring at me as if looking right at my soul. I gulped and shifted a bit backward feeling uncomfortable but he didn't budge.
"I feel like I was never in love with him." I said quietly. It surprised me how easy it was for me to admit it to a total stranger. I didn't want to accept it myself but when I said it out loud, it felt like a weight has been lifted off from my shoulder. I waited for him to say something but there was no reaction on his face. He just studied me intently.
After a while, he said, "Well that's a deal breaker. I bet that is the actual reason why you broke up with him."
"But I really feel like I should be in love with him." I whined. He chuckled and smiled at me.
"Claire, just because you see a guy who is much better than anyone you have ever dated doesn't mean you will have to fall for him. It doesn't mean he is the one. Plus the whole concept of the one is stupid. Fredrick Backman said everyone in this world is a little weird. And the world is a little weird and when we meet someone who matches our level of weirdness, we call it love." I gaped at him. Okay, he just got a lot sexier.
"You read Backman?"
"Just....a lot."
"I have read Anxious People and A Man Called Ove. I loved him after those books." I said and he smiled at me. I looked out the window at that couple I passed by when I came in this café. They were smiling and chatting at each other and they seemed happy. It reminded me of the time Taylor first asked me to be his girlfriend. I did say yes but looking back, I knew I wasn't sure. I knew I was not ready for a guy like Taylor but I said yes anyway because I just wanted to be with someone who is mature and calm and rational about stuff.
"So you think I did the right thing?"
"I do" He said and smiled at me.
"So you think I am innocent in this?" I asked biting my lip. His eyes trailed to my lips but he quickly looked at my eyes again clearing his throat.
"Oh no. Not at all. You have been with him for three years. You should have figured this out long ago. You are an ass for making him believe you are in love with him for so long but still better late than never." He said and winked at me. He took a sip of his drink and a foam formed above his lips.
"You look particularly handsome right now." I said and laughed pointing at his foam moustache. He gave me a bored look and wiped it with the napkin.
"So, my turn. Why are you an ass?" I asked.
"You have to be more specific."
"Hm true. Why do you have one night stands with girls and then basically tell them to fuck off?" His posture stiffened and he looked as if he would literally be anywhere else than here. He scratched his neck, a habit I noticed he has whenever he is uncomfortable. I gave him time to form his words.
I looked outside and saw this beautiful family walking together in a park. It reminded me of the time when I, mom, dad and sis used to go out on trips. We would go with all these preparations like meals and drinks that I and my mom made. My dad and my sister used to pack all the clothes and essentials that we would need on the trip. The best part was never the destination, in fact we hardly cared about where we were going. It was the journey that was perfect. We used to sing, click photos with silly faces, eat like a pig without any care about anything. My mom and dad used to bitch about their work and how annoying it is to grow old while we just used to laugh at their stories without understanding much. Life was good and I miss that. But some things just can never go back to the way they were, I thought.
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