~39~
*Warning-smut*
In simple words, I am fucked.
I was fucked the second I opened to door and Colby's lips stuck to mine like glue.
I was fucked when he pushed me against the wall and fiddled with the string on my corset until it came loose and my dress fell to the ground, accompanying his white button-up shirt I had tossed carelessly to the side.
I was fucked when I let him nibble the sweet spit on my neck; The one he's found times and times before. Knowing just where it was, above my collar bone. Sucking and biting away as though it would slip from his grasp.
I was fucked when I smirked into his skin and clawed at his back as he did his work on my skin, unable to keep the small gasps of pleasure from leaving my red-stained lips, the gloss smeared away from tonight's events.
This whole thing was fucked. But, it was the kind of fucked that made me needy. That made me crave into desire and let every emotion I was feeling take hold of my actions and allow instinct to consume my thoughts. It was the kind of fucked that affected both people. Colby and I. Because while I was enjoying it, Colby was loving it much more.
He, as I was, was giving in to temptation and letting his hands roam while he focused on leaving marks on my skin as he had done before. He twirled his fingers around the lace of the bra, bringing it out and snapping it against my skin, which caused the smallest of gasps of leave from within me. The stinging sensation giving me a rather unusual joy. His knee was pressed between my legs, the bulge in his pants pushing against my upper thigh. It was straining his pants, seeming as though it was fighting to escape.
I wanted to give it that escape but feared it wasn't the right time. But then again when was the right time? This was my first time going this far. And yes at the moment it was only a hardcore make-out, but, it was going to escalate. And I was prepared in some way. Don't get me wrong, I was still nervous. Who wouldn't be? But I was also clueless at the hands-on part. I've seen it, in what I watched earlier this morning, but seeing is a lot different than doing.
How fast, or how slow would we go? How long would it last? What happens after? To put it in simpler words, was I prepared?
No, I wouldn't get in my head. That never ends well for me.
I let every thought slip away and let whatever was happening now, at this moment, take its course. He would guide me I hope, seeing as he has more... experience, in this type of thing. He's also very patient, and kind while doing this, but also rough and careless. It was like there were two sides to this intimacy. Soft and rough. And both, I loved.
"Fuck." His voice pressed into me, a strain in his tone. I assume it's from the pressure in his pants. The thought made me giggle, at both that and his words. He reacted, "You find this funny?"
I bit my lip and looked up, holding back from laughing anymore. From experience, he didn't like being mocked. But I was too late. He scooped me up, wrapping my legs around him and slithering his arms around my lower back. I looked at him with a gasp, his quick moves causing some hair to fall over my face. He moved them away, walking us over to the bed and then dropping me onto the cushion. I bounced up and down a little before becoming steady, looking up as he towered over me dominantly.
I scooted back until I pressed my back against the bed frame, Colby crawling over me until his body hovered over mine. He guided his eyes up and down my body, inspecting the parts that were visible to him. When his eyes met mine again, he smirked. He brought his hand to my face and dragging my lip out from underneath my teeth, chuckling "Don't bite your lip darling, that's what I do." And then he crawled off of me, walking away. At first, I was confused, but then I noticed he was walking towards the lights.
Now I didn't know this, but the lights dimmed in this hotel. A little knob clicked as it spun until the lights were low, creating a much more inviting environment. I rolled my shoulders in anticipation, not entirely sure of what to come next. I never know with him.
But, I had high hopes.
He slowly walked back over, purposefully going slow to antagonize me.
"You just love doing that." I sigh.
He grinned, "Doing what."
"That. What you are doing. Do you enjoy seeing me annoyed?" I tilt my head. He chuckled and shrugged, walking around the bed until he was on the left side and looking down at me. His hand extended out and grazed my jawline, lifting my head ever so slightly; Gently.
"I don't mean to, probably instinct." I crack a smile, "I'm just thinking about how I can't have sex with you." And then my smile fell.
"What?" I wasn't meaning to sound like a brat. Anyone would have that reaction if you just did what we did and then the guy said something like that. Did it sound bad? Fuck, I don't want to be that kind of person. I should, am, okay with this. But I expect an explanation.
He didn't respond, just climbed behind me and let my back lay against his chest, my body sitting in between his legs. His hands dragged slowly up and down my arms, caressing them gently. His warm breath shivered down my skin and I awaited an explication.
"One, there are three buffoons next door who will have our heads if they heard whatever we do in here." One of his hands left my arms and slid down my torso towards my panties. He dragged it over them until they met where I was most sensitive now. He rubbed once, and I shivered and gasped, "And two." He kept rubbing, slowly, "The things I will do to you require much more attention than I am willing to give you in this hotel room."
He robbed in slow motions, up and down, in circles, side to side. With every movement, my body adjusted. I hummed, whined, rolled my hips, anything so I could get the slightest relief. But the only relief I was getting was every time Colby teased me.
He continued, "I want to make you scream my name." He put more pressure, enough to want my panties to melt away so he could touch me without it the cloth barrier.
"I want you to be begging for more, because I'll be going at a pace that makes your back ache and yearn for more than what I'll be giving you right away." His lips were up to my ear, his breath providing more chills than what he was already giving me. My legs were spread out, his wrapped above them and slowly spreading them open. My inability to squeeze my legs together for relief only grew the sensitivity in my spot, but that was what he was aiming for.
"You're dripping." He whispered, earning the smallest of moans to seep from my shut lips. It was fighting to escape, but I had to keep in mind that this was a hotel and I wasn't quite sure how thin the walls were. I wasn't taking any chances but I also couldn't control myself. The need to express my pleasure was intense, and this was hard.
"Imagine how wet you'd be without these." He drew out the lace and let it snap back.
"Please." I breathe out quickly, trying to squirm but his legs not allowing me to. So I only rolled my hips into him.
"Oh? You want them off?" I nodded rapidly, needing it. Want wasn't even a word in my vocabulary anymore. Need, desire, lust, crave, require, wish, demand, and yearn were all there in replacement. Those, and a few others if I think hard enough.
"You know I can't do that just yet darling, where's the fun in that?" The smirk on his lip made me want to kill him. It angered me he wouldn't go further just yet, making me wait. "I go slow, because once I start... I go hard, and I want this to be memorable for you."
"Shit." I moan, my hands itching to aid my throbbing clit. I held back, knowing he would simply move them back and make me suffer. He noticed this.
"Are your hands causing a problem?" He asked, "Let's fix that."
His spare hand reached down to his belt, effortlessly taking it off and bringing it in front of us. "Wrists?" He asked invitingly, and I obliged, putting my wrists together in front of me. He wrapped the belt around them and tightened them tight, kissing my knuckles before putting them behind his neck so his head kept my hands behind me.
The immobility only made the fire inside me rise, and my need to be touched grow.
His hands returned to their rubbing motion, only this time it was directed in one spot and the pace was much faster. The small circular motion made my breathing speed up, my chest pulsating. I was fighting not to make too much noise, but it was difficult. I wanted to release everything in me but had to keep it down to gasps and winces.
But if I had the freedom my voice would fill this room like a flood. Colby would enjoy that I bet, he loved the sound of my voice. To know how I was feeling.
How was I to express that if I couldn't tell him how he's making me feel without actually saying how he was making me feel?
"I can feel your wetness through the lace." He whispers, speeding up the pace, then going slow, then speeding it up again. The inconsistency of it making my breathing hitch and move with the motions.
The heat in my gut grew as it speeds up, and I could only wonder what it'd feel like without the lace barrier.
"Then take it off." I gasp, begging at this point, "Remove the lace and feel me freely. Please?"
He grinned, "Are you begging?" He said, almost impressed by my submissive words. I was just as surprised, but not entirely.
I wince, tensing my legs and releasing them, "Yes." I moan.
He took a second, "Let me hear it again. Tell me how much you want it."
I groan internally, "I want you to touch me. To violate me, if you want. Just make me feel good."
"What, no please?"
Fuck.
"Please!" I pretty much yell.
"Shh." He hushed, and to my surprise, his hand left my heated spot and moved upwards until they met the elastic part of my panties, "But because you said please." He dragged them down, finally letting cool air reach the heat trapped. It felt freeing without the lace, the air giving me a sense of enjoyment. He tossed them to the ground.
He didn't hold back, resuming rubbing my throbbing vagina. Only this time it was without the panties, and this opened up a new gate of reactions.
It was harder to hold in my whines.
The overbearing tingling sensation that grew every time he moved my folds around made my back arch. My shoulders tended and my hands clamped together behind his neck.
"You're practically dripping." He continued to rub, using his thumb to rub my clit in circular motions. I rolled my hips into his hand, asking for more. Wanting his fingers to penetrate me. "Didn't know I had this kind of effect on you."
"You suck." I groan.
"Oh do I?" He stopped rubbing and immediately I regretted my words. His free hand spring to my neck and he roughly lifted my head until I was looking up at him, our faces close. He kept it there with a firm grip, "I have the control here remember? And I don't stand for brats." He seethed.
I breathed heavily, finding the dominance arousing. It sparked butterflies in my gut and my stomach churned with need.
Then, unexpectedly, his finger entered me. The surprise of it made my back arch and a loud moan leave my lips unapologetically. A fiery chill crawled up my body and euphoric dizziness clouded my mind. Pressure was applied to my neck, where Colby's hand kept my head lifted. It didn't choke me, rather blocked blood from completely flowing to my brain and making me feel slightly lightheaded.
But that only made it better.
"I don't like it when girls talk back." He growled into my ear, curling his finger within me. I struggled to hold in my moans of pleasure. From both his fingers and the way he was handling me. Roughly, as though he owned me. I let him, because I wanted it. To be dominated.
The power he had over me was arousing and I couldn't get enough of it.
"Fuck." I groan, moving my hips along with his movements.
He added another finger, and I just about screamed his name. "Apologize." He demanded. I didn't speak, only focused on every sensation burning throughout my body.
"Now." He seethed, picking you the pace of his movements, his thumb rubbing my clit.
"Sorry," I whine, biting my tongue as to not scream. His hand pushed my neck away, my head falling back against his shoulder. The hand moved to my breasts, where he squeezed them. I moaned again, if being almost impossible to hold them in anymore.
With every curve of his finger, I found the struggle to hold in a whine or groan harder and harder. The feeling of him inside of me was amazing. I wanted to express it, but couldn't.
I was biting back the moans.
"Thank you for apologizing." He whispered, and I hummed, "And I'm sorry for not letting you use your words to express how I'm making you feel." He rubbed my collarbone, "I promise next time you can yell my name all you want. But, for now, you need to stay as quiet as you can."
The pace of his two fingers sped up, "Though it must be hard."
I whine again, my voice unusually high.
"All I want to do is hear you moaning my name."
My body jerks.
"To listen to your sweet voice lose control."
My body could barely handle what it was given. A heat rose from deep inside of me and I struggled to keep it contained.
The speed up his fingers increased significantly. Moving inside of me so fast I began to lose control. My legs fought against his, my back struggled to keep straight, I couldn't keep my mouth shut and my noises contained, and the ringing in my ears grew.
"Don't stop," I whine, screwing my eyes shut and letting out deathly breaths.
"Are you close darling?"
If being "close" meant I was reaching my point, then yes, I was close.
"Fuck." I moaned, "Fuck fuck fuck fuck-"
"Shh."
"Fuck that. I-I'm gonna-" I groaned, my head pressing so hard against his shoulder I thought I was going to break my neck. My arms squeezing around him. His fingers were igniting a fire from inside me, and I've just about had it.
His fingers jerked inside me "Cum for me baby."
And that was it.
Everything in me stopped.
My rapid breathing, my hectic motions, the chill in my spine, my struggling legs.
Everything went quiet and the ringing in my ears replaced my sounds of pleasure. My brain short-circuited and my senses stopped functioning. I shut up and focused all my attention on the feeling of climax. The eruption of pleasure in me that cause my arching back to freeze and my knees to buckle, my eyes rolling back to the back of my head if felt like. My mouth was open, but no noise came out. Everything was within me.
The feeling of every nerve in me exploding.
The tingling feeling in my thighs reaching its height.
The heat rushing out from between my legs into Colby's hand.
Finally, I wasn't able to hold it in anymore, and released everything in me onto him without shame.
"Shit." I breathe out, the euphoric feeling slowly falling. My body still twitched with feeling, intense feeling, but I was able to breathe again. Even if it wasn't proper breaths.
Colby's hand left from between my legs and he brought it to his mouth, sucking on his fingers one by one and consuming everything I let out. With sweat dripping on my forehead, I breathed out in relief. Not that it was over, but that it happened.
I just orgasmed.
It was a whole new experience, once I'm more than happy to go through it again.
But this was only fingering, what would it be like during real sex? I shook the question away and only thought about what was happening at the moment.
"You taste so good, darling." Colby praises sweetly, kissing my sweat coated cheek, "Sweet, like the fruit you always eat"
I laugh lightly out of exhaustion, finding his words funny. "Oh fuck." I breathe out, only starting to catch my breath. He noticed and rubbed my shoulders with ease, causing my neck to roll and stretch itself out. It felt good, the tension releasing from within me.
"You did good." His voice was calm, smooth.
"Thanks," I mumble, feeling tired after everything that's gone down.
There was some comfortable silence, "How was your first orgasm?"
The blatancy of question made me smile, "Amazing."
I finally opened my eyes to look at him, seeing a smile on his pink lips. I lifted my chin and kissed them, slowly and softly. When I pulled back I smiled, staring into his sparkling blue eyes which lit up with color. Their signature blue which has grown brighter over the night. They were so pretty, beautiful even. Even in the dim lighting, they glowed with life.
But, there was always darkness in them. Deep in his mind, he wasn't always happy, I knew this. It was a feeling I had, and tonight made me realize that I may know why.
Ana lee.
The girl he supposedly loved, who died. Doesn't matter how or who, but it hurt him, it did. Even if he won't talk about it, even if he didn't know I knew, it caused pain in him.
And I only wish to relieve that pain.
I didn't realize my smile fell until Colby pointed it out.
"What?"
I grew back the smile, "Nothing, just," I was quick to make up a lie, "Hoping the guys didn't hear anything." Okay so maybe it wasn't a complete lie..
He laughed softly, also tired, "I doubt it. But, if they did, they wouldn't dare bring it up in front of me. Unless they're asking for a death wish." His hands wrapped around my waist and he held me close, his cheek pressed into my hair. I took in his warmth, cuddling into his bare chest, my eyes traveling over all his tattoos.
He had so many.
"Do they hurt to get?" I ask out of the blue.
His eyes fall to his skin, "Some do, but, it's a good kind of pain."
I furrow my brows, "A good pain? I don't see how pain can be good."
He shrugged, "It isn't always. But sometimes the pain makes us stronger, resilient. It shows just how strong we are."
"Sounds a little cliche to me." I look down.
"Oh it is, but it's always proven correct for me. With every needle poked into my skin, every scar I've earned, every... tear I've shed." I look up, "I've grown.. y'know?"
I nod, "Yeah." I breathe out, "I do know."
Not really. I don't see how anything that has caused me pain has made me stronger. If anything, it's made me weaker. I'm scared of the dark for god's sake, how stupid is that? Pain hasn't done anything good for me, only bad.
But I wouldn't admit it out loud.
He may know I'm scared of the dark, but he doesn't know why. He doesn't know my past, and I don't know if he ever will.
But, it didn't matter right now. I wasn't going to dwell on anything bad right now.
I was in Virginia after all. The place where I attended a banquet, danced in my dream location with the man who would later show me what it was like to have an orgasm. Not my ideal vision of a vacation, but it worked.
It was memorable, and I was grateful for that.
"I should probably head back to my room." Colby said, and suddenly I felt uncomfortable. I looked at him with furrowed brows, and he smirked cheekily, "Just kidding. But, I do need to use the restroom."
I smirk at his cruel joke and scoot up, letting him leave from behind me and get off the bed. I pulled the covers over my chest and watched him walk towards the bathroom, glancing over at me with a warm smile before shutting the door and disappearing.
My eyes widened and I inaudibly yelled into the blanket, shock filling my mind at what we've done. I laughed quietly into the sheets and then lifted my head back up, mouthing "Holy shit." Before leaving the bed and tiptoeing over to my bags, stepping over Colby and I'd discarded pieces of clothing, and taking out a large T-shirt. I slipped it over my body and grabbed a new pair of panties, slipping those on as well.
I then rushed back over to the bed and jumped in, cuddling under the comforters and snuggling into its warmth. I sighed, contently.
Then the restroom door opened again and Colby emerged, wearing only his briefs. He smiled at my position and laughed to himself, walking over and getting in next to me.
I didn't take him as the kind of person to cuddle, so I was surprised when he pulled me close to him and wrapped his strong arm around me, his other one resting under his head.
He smiled, looking at my features and seeming to fond over me, "It's strange," he began, "When I first met you I didn't think it'd lead to here."
I smiled too, "...When you first met me you drugged and kidnapped me."
He sighed and shut his eyes, "way to kill the mood."
I laughed, "Sorry, I had to."
"Yeah yeah."
I give a crooked smirk, "I know what you mean though. I didn't think we'd be here either."
There was some silence.
"What happens from here?" I ask.
"What do you mean?"
"Well.. I don't know, just what happens? Between us."
He paused in thought, and I almost thought he wasn't going to respond. But then he did, and it melted my heart. "I don't think I'll be able to resist showing you my affection after this..."
***
A/n:
*Sighs in loneliness*
Hee Hee, this took while to write and now it's 3 a.m 😀
Honestly this Harry Styles fic I'm reading has me fucked up. Want a good recommendation? Duplicity! FUCK IT'S SO GOOD!
Okay, Night :)